How much arguing it too much for kids?

[sopra]

I come from a very toxic household. My parents fought all the time. Screaming / occasional violence / horrible name calling/ threats of divorce / leaving my mum on the street with nothing/ telling her she's worthless etc etc. you name it, I heard it.

I remember feeling very anxious and scared when I would see / hear these arguments. My parents never even tried to hide this ( it feels like )..

Anyhow. I am married now. I have little kids. Life is stressful. I can't work out how much arguing is normal ? How about shouting ?

You could argue that the fact I ask this question means it's too much. But I didn't have a normal experience.

How often do normal people shout at each other or fight in front of their kids ? How will it affect them in later life ? My kids are 3 and 1.

Mine see conflict (ie disagreements), but not shouting/arguing.

My parents used to scream at eachother and I was terrified.
I never shout in front of the kids, or apart from them if I'm honest. We can argue while still showing respect for each other.

@Hailtheteam conflict doesn't (and shouldn't have to be) about shouting.

We don't argue in front of them. We do furiously text at times, but generally we agree to always put a pin in it until they are in bed. I grew up with lots of shouting and I hated it.

We sometimes disagree, but we don’t shout, use aggressive/unpleasant language and we always resolve anything we disagree about in front of the children if they have witnessed any of it.