AIBU for hoping my husband would do something nice for my birthday?

7 replies

Usercmee · 26/03/2023 23:43

I’m not really a huge birthday person and every year my husband puts in minimal effort for my birthday. He always seems to work late on my actual birthday so we’ll often get a takeaway or go out for a meal the weekend after. This is often planned,
arranged and ordered by me.

This year I have a big birthday and was hoping he might do something nice. I’m not looking for a big gesture or anything expensive more him putting a bit of thought into planning something for me like arranging a meal out. My mum wants to take me out for lunch on my birthday and ran the plans past DH who basically said he wasn’t planning on doing anything.

I should also add I had my first Mother’s Day this year and although he got me a nice gift I spent the day alone with our son as he was hungover so feeling generally happy undervalued from him.

Am I wrong for feeling upset about this?
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Allmyplantsdie · 26/03/2023 23:46

You are not being unreasonable, and you know that you aren’t.

what happens in his birthday?

Mammyloveswine · 26/03/2023 23:50

Ffs sick of seeing posts With pathetic men making zero effort...

What has he actually got you/done for your birthday?

Hope you had a nice lunch with your DM.

Happy birthday from me

llamazoo2 · 27/03/2023 00:00

Happy birthday OP. Not unreasonable x

Thedogscollar · 27/03/2023 00:04

Honestly if you're young get out. So fed up of posts like this. You making all the effort him making none.

PousseyNotMoira · 27/03/2023 00:20

Have you told him how you feel?

Strainzer · 27/03/2023 00:23

Stop making any efforts for his birthday or Father's day. Organise him to care for your baby on mother's day and have a spa day and take yourself out for lunch (you can do a special mother-child day on another day you have care of your child). Plan a night out with your friends and let him babysit on your birthday. He may get the picture and up his game but if he doesn't at least you won't need to look back and regret the birthdays/mother's days that weren't fun, or the effort you wasted trying to convince him to treat you nicely on special days.

Fraaahnces · 27/03/2023 00:28

Why don’t you spell it out? I expect you to organize something nice for me this year. It is a special birthday for me. I want you to put some effort into this please. It’s easy for partners to slip between the cracks and honestly, this is where I feel I am. Please do this for me.

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