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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Calling a woman 'Teeny Tiny'

18 replies

MissTesseract · 25/03/2023 21:02

It's condescending, passive aggressive and rude. Surely I'm not being unreasonable to feel uncomfortable with it?
We're all a mixed bag of sizes and weights, and I should imagine, and quite rightly, that 'fatty watty' wouldn't pass muster at all.

We are supposed to help each other up here, not reduce those who have a bare smidgen of privilege. We all know thin privilege exists, along with every other mindless, ignorant societal division, often egged on by the media and the bitter twist of life on tis earth. But should we encourage it?

Tis expression reduces any woman to insignificance. It's infantilising and unpleasant. Some people are, by nature, fucking small. And as far as I am aware, there is a genetic component to obesity, or at least being on the larger side of the scale.
For centuries we have been pitted agains tone another, as women, in an effort to fit societies standards. I don't blame men, they are unwittingly born into the same system; but we can learn. And we ought to be the ones bestowing dignity and respect on one another, in an effort to screw this impossible, arbitrary system.

If a woman is slender, she isn't a threat to you, to us, or anyone. If a woman is large, same thing.

Let's not turn ourselves into puppets of a rancid patriarchy, internalising standards set by such random and shifting trends. Power lies in acceptance, and looking beyond the surface. A thin woman is a fat woman's ally. And vice versa. At least we ought to be.

OP posts:
MissTesseract · 25/03/2023 21:03

No idea what's a goin' on with my 'H' key, lol.

OP posts:
EggyBreads · 25/03/2023 21:03

You sound like you're writing an article.

mynameiscalypso · 25/03/2023 21:05

My colleague describes herself as teeny tiny. She is. She's an intellectual powerhouse though.

Albiboba · 25/03/2023 21:07

Have a drink or something.

AllOfThemWitches · 25/03/2023 21:07

Lol I've literally seen mumsnetters describe themselves as 'teeny tiny.' Anyway, men get loads more shit for being small.

LuciferRising · 25/03/2023 21:08

The phrase is ridiculous. Regarding thin privilege, i'm slender / athletic due to martial arts but am below 5 feet. So I don't have height privilege. Anyone who uses teeny tiny is insecure. It tells you everything you need to know about the person.

Riverlee · 25/03/2023 21:10

Are you teeney tiny by any chance? I don’t see it as condescending or passive aggressive. It’s just a way of describing someone who is alot smaller than average. There may be better phrases, but it’s not offensive

Riverlee · 25/03/2023 21:11

@LuciferRising i don’t quite get what you mean when you say it tells you everything you need to ‘now about that person. Why are they insecure?

RatesWillRise · 25/03/2023 21:12

I don’t love being called tiny. My personality is big and I am as assertive as they come. My brother does it to wind me up.

My friends have a short adult daughter who always calls herself ‘petite’. She mentions it a lot. For some reason my kids find this really annoying.

AllOfThemWitches · 25/03/2023 21:13

RatesWillRise · 25/03/2023 21:12

I don’t love being called tiny. My personality is big and I am as assertive as they come. My brother does it to wind me up.

My friends have a short adult daughter who always calls herself ‘petite’. She mentions it a lot. For some reason my kids find this really annoying.

Your kids probably think she's a bit 'pick me.'

RatesWillRise · 25/03/2023 21:17

AllOfThemWitches · 25/03/2023 21:13

Your kids probably think she's a bit 'pick me.'

Ha I will Google that phenomenon. Not heard of it!

Nottodaysausage · 25/03/2023 21:19

I get you OP, the only person who calls me this is a colleague who is hell bent on giving me at least 5 back handed compliments a day.
There is no need to comment on a person's appearance whatsoever

MissTesseract · 25/03/2023 21:27

yes i should have a drink and write an article. Ignore what im saying if it suits you.

OP posts:
MissTesseract · 25/03/2023 21:28

im saying there's a lot of faux feminism about!

OP posts:
AllOfThemWitches · 25/03/2023 21:30

RatesWillRise · 25/03/2023 21:17

Ha I will Google that phenomenon. Not heard of it!

It's a youth thing (17yo daughter here).

MissBattleaxe · 25/03/2023 21:32

I can't get worked up about this at all. Some people are teeny tiny and some are tall. Are we not allowed to observe height any more? Ridiculous.

Iyjd · 25/03/2023 21:41

MissBattleaxe · 25/03/2023 21:32

I can't get worked up about this at all. Some people are teeny tiny and some are tall. Are we not allowed to observe height any more? Ridiculous.

I’m short and I hate people commenting on it. A woman at work uses the phrase teeny tiny to patronise me. Things like you won’t be able to lead that meeting, you are too teeny tiny for them to take you seriously, let’s send ???(someone less senior/experienced). I wouldn’t dream of commenting on her appearance even though there’s loads she can ‘improve’ but I can’t change my height.

LuciferRising · 25/03/2023 21:48

Riverlee · 25/03/2023 21:11

@LuciferRising i don’t quite get what you mean when you say it tells you everything you need to ‘now about that person. Why are they insecure?

Go look at the other site where they rip to pieces people on here for being normal. Teeny Tiny is most certainly an insult.

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