Should I be doing more? (Work/terminal parent)

[FoolsOld]

So as not to drip feed - DF end stage bowel cancer. In hospital with a severe infection. Travelled 400 miles to be here leaving DH with the kids (both primary school age) since Monday. DM died of cancer seven years ago. DSis in Dubai trying to get back. Started new job four months ago. On Tuesday, hospital were talking about end of life treatment, palliative care. Today DF has rallied slightly post some very strong antibiotics but there's no saying he'll get better. It's been a horrible stressful rollercoaster week with all of the care and decision making on me. Alongside that I've been working from home (Dads, not mine) trying to stay on top of a demanding workload. Boss is aware of situation re: Dad. But I have a huge meeting with the Exec board on Monday. I need to give a presentation and I'm just not prepared. I'm going to try and travel home tomorrow if DF is stable so I can relieve DH of childcare duties. If I work tomorrow night, then Saturday and Sunday I might be ok, but I'm absolutely exhausted. Should I push myself and get it done (as someone still quite new to the company) or should I be honest with my boss and ask for another week to get it done?

Ask for another week. Can’t the company give you some time off?

I would be honest with your boss - you're not slacking off with the sniffles.
You need to be there for your dad and make sure you are taking care of yourself as well. This must be exhausting for you as it is without adding work pressure on top.

If you make it home, use that time to recharge. I'm sure your DH doesn't expect to be relieved of looking after his own children at a time like this.

Be honest with your boss. You only have this once.

They could but I've been very much 'I'll soldier on and work as much as I can'. But I wasn't expecting talk of palliative care and end of life. Even DF was telling me he was too tired and ready to go.

The situation has changed and worsened now. Let your company know. If they are a decent company, they will want to support you.

Take time off. My brother did what you're doing when our dad was dying. He prioritised work and imo was weirdly beholden to his bosses. He was there when dad died but hadn't been there for all the weeks leading up to it. It haunts him to this day. He literally cannot get past it. It's a huge source of pain for him.

Thank you. I'm happy to keep working as and when - it's the only thing keeping my racing mind busy! And I promise I'm not being a martyr. I've just spoken to the head of HR and she's advised me to push the meeting, take today off and will explain to the rest of the Exec what my situation is. I feel better that at least someone in the company knows how dire the situation is.