Devastated over friendship ending

[cadburyegg]

I've posted a few threads about this friend but basically we had a conversation tonight and realised we both want different things from the friendship that we aren't able to give the other.

I'm absolutely devastated, this person has helped me through lockdown, my marriage breaking down, my dad dying... big stuff.

She is still living with me as well although I have told her she needs to move out by summer, so we have to live together til then.

I'm so sad 😭😭😭😭
Please tell me I will get through this

I had a friendship that ended at the end of last year. I sometimes mourn the loss of what I thought was one of the best friends I could have. However, I don't really miss them. It turns out they were making my life a misery. You never know, you might find your future brighter without them 💐

I had a friendship that lasted years. It was an odd one because we didn't 'do' much together and we had different values and interests....but I liked her and enjoyed her company. I watched useless partners come and go, inwardly groaned when she announced her 3rd child to yet another unsuitable dad. She was in poverty and debt since having children aggravated by drug use.
There was a disturbing incident with her last partner (not one of the dads) and I tried to speak to her and give her a wake up call. Social Services became involved. In the end I wrote a letter which unfortunately enraged her. l knew she wouldn't like it but I was shocked at her reaction. She completely turned and blamed and accused me of hoping behind her back to undermine her. That really hurt and I grieved the loss for s long time. Its been a few years now and I still miss her and it hurts that she would think such things of me. I carry her secrets with me now. But as much as I miss her we were not compatible. As adults, we never were. Personalities and interests can be very different but when push comes to shove if your values misalign the relationship will crumble. I think this is true of all 'serious' relationships.
I imagine it's going to be very hard for you both and I don't think you'll properly process this until she's truly out of your life. It took me a good 2 years to not 'feel' the hurt.