Playing & reading

[Drinkinginthemorningsun]

How often do you read to your dc?
Do you play with them, properly play?

My Dd, 4, is happiest just playing at home with us, I do it, but find it so hard to actually *Want to 🙈
I’m great with the crafts, cooking, days out etc but I know actually playing is her absolutely favourite

I read to them every night as part of a bedtime routine, but play, not very much. I find it boring. I will do about 30 minutes a day maybe, a puzzle, a bit with trains.

@pjani It’s so hard 🙈but I know how much she loves it.
We read at night also, a couple of books, that I love, the playing, not so much

I read to them every night. I can't stand playing. I do board games or craft but not pretend games. My two are close in age and this kind of play they do together, I stay out of it.

It's a lot easier to play with a 2 year old than a 4 year old though.

2 year olds are happy to share a train or follow directed play and you have the nappies and naps to break it up.

4 year olds are much more independent and want to play imagination things like mums and dads and hide and seek and its relentless. Particularly if they dont want to play with proper toys like puzzles and games.

Imaginative play is extremely important but it doesn't have to be difficult.

A few of my fav games;

• Being a patient in hospital - Get the play drs kit out. Lay down. Go to sleep while the Dr/nurse gets to work. (If you don't have a drs kit, then get one. It's a life-saver!).

• Hair dressers - You sit down while they put a zillion ribbons, clips, accessories etc in your hair. You'll look like a clown, but it's definitely relaxing!

• Jigsaw puzzles

@CheersForThatEh Exactly! It was so much easier when Dd was younger. Now she wants me to be to Anna and she’s Elsa etc. I don’t mind puzzles & board games, but she’s not that fussed about them, it’s allll about imaginative play for her at the moment and I do it all, but also sometimes feel like biting my own arm off! 😂

I read every night now she is older, but i don't really 'play' play. I used to do puzzles etc or when she was playing with her kitchen i'd take the food she handed me etc, i'll set up drawing/painting/play doh etc and chat to her while she does it but thats about it.

She has learned to play very happily by herself/friends, and has a great imagination, which is what i hoped she would have in case she was an only child.

I have family members who play/entertain theit kids all the time and the result is kids with little imagination who refuse to play by themselves

Of course independent play should be encouraged too, but this doesn’t mean just leaving them with a load of toys and telling them to get on with it.

Why doesn't it? That's exactly what independent play is and children have done it since time began.

OP, I used to read to/with mine every night and like you, I'd do the crafts/puzzles/board games etc but not the imaginative play so much.

Once they start nursery/school they tend to do lots of that with friends anyway.

I used to invent games which required me to do the minimum amount of interacting whilst giving the semblance that I was fully involved.

I think restaurants was my favourite. You can order an increasingly long list of unlikely dishes; the DC have to go and make them, and then you can spend ages pretending to eat them. Then when you're bored with the game you can get food poisoning and have to go and lie down or need urgent first aid. Or if you want to get them out the house, the restaurant suddenly catches fire requiring immediate evacuation.

Lots of 'play specialists' actually say that independent play or play with peers is more important than playing with an adult though.

When they play independently, they have more freedom and creativity to develop skills and imagination rather than it being steered by an adult.

My two are 6 (nearly 7) and 5 and obviously at school a lot of the time. They also get on really well (most of the time!!) and play amazingly together so most of the time, I don't get involved. We however all play board/card play games together.

I played more with them when they were younger, particularly with my eldest as she obviously didn't then have a built in playmate. Not surprisingly though, my youngest is far better at playing independently and keeping himself occupied than my oldest!

They both are read to (and read to us) at bed time.

Mine are older now but I always found this type of imaginary/pretend play very difficult. It’s tedious, no way around it.

I sometimes did it, sometimes didn’t and now I’ve just filed it under the list of things that you “should” do for your children but didn’t and thus feel a bit guilty and worried about.

It’s a long list.

With my eldest (8) well play on the evening maybe half an hour together-he likes drawing competitions at the moment. He loves making little film sets/ scenes up in his bedroom and making movies with his little figures...I would love to be involved but apparently im a terrible at making sets😆

My middle enjoys more physical games so we play floor is lava, ninja moves, dance offs - don't mind these games I kinda enjoy them!

My youngest (3) loves dolly house, being a dog and playing shops. The dog one I find tedious - I basically pretend to tqke my child for a walk, pick up poop, say come along doggy and we play fetch over and over. Shes quite particular on how I play and directs me a lot so I do find playing with my youngest more of a chore than my older two. I do think it gets easier though OP so hang in there! 😅

Reading yes, every day. DH and I read to one of them every night, then the next night we swap. DD gets a couple of chapters of her book, DS gets two stories. And we read to them in the day if they want, more so when they were younger. DD is 9 and can go off and read by herself, DS is 4 and is picking it up quickly but still likes us to read to him.

Playing, not so much! I'll play endless board, card and video games. I'll bake, do crafts, colour, paint, take them to the park, watch them jump on the trampoline, etc. But I don't do imaginary play! If they give me a pretend cup of tea I'll go along with it obviously, but I'm useless at playing schools or mermaids or Spiderman or whatever. They play those sorts of games together or with their friends at school.

It’s terminally dull, but has to be done!