Mother's Day vs Father's Day

[nc13467]

For those lucky enough to have 2 parents with them, and still together, what do you do in Mother's Day?

I have one dsis, no other siblings and one Dd of my own. Always tend to have a girlie lunch/spa/meal just the 4 of us. I'm married, dsis is single (not sure if that's relevant).

On Mother's Day my dad usually stays at home or does his hobby and my DH does his own thing for a couple of hours while we're out (his own mum has passed and he'd understandably rather forget it's Mother's Day).

Anyway, my dad joked the other night about not being invited and being "left out" (confident it was a genuine joke, not a hint. He's been invited other times and said to go ahead and have a girly day).

However, in response I said "don't worry, me and dsis will take you out on Father's Day and mum can stay at home". Again this was tongue in cheek as my mums always there on Father's Day.

However I could tell she was slightly put out at the suggestion and I know if we were actually to do this it would be an issue.

Why is that? Is it because all my mum & dads children are girls and it's a girly day for Mother's Day, yet a family affair for Father's Day?

Anyone take their dad out alone on Father's Day and leave their mum at home? If not, why is it acceptable the other way round?

Not something I'm overly worried about but just trying to reconcile the difference in my own mind

I treat both days as family days - noo one gets left out. Whatever suits you all is fine though - it sounds as if you're all happy with the current arrangements?

Usually go out for a meal with the whole family (mum, dad, dh, kids, sis, bro in law, their kids). Fathers day we'd be more likely to have a bbq as it's in June so not roast dinner weather. We'd just do an open invitation or my parents would host. Wouldn't exclude anyone, it's nice to have time together.

I'm now feeling really guilty about excluding my dad. I guess it's because he's the only male that it's easier to have a girly day out. Didn't realise how much he might've felt excluded until I thought how it would be if I left my mum out

Mother's Day we're all together, father's, son, mums and daughters. Ditto on father's Day

We have the same set up as you, parents still together and there's me and my sister. We usually go out with just my mum for mother's Day - lunch usually, maybe shopping, that sort of thing. And we go out with just my dad for father's Day - a long walk usually, often followed by lunch at a pub, my mum sometimes joins us for the lunch though.

All of us are all together on both days.

It wouldn't feel fair to leave my Dad out on Mother's Day but include my DM on Father's Day.

Family days here too

Really don't feel guilty. It's accepted that family members of the same sex will do things together occasionally. My DH and DS play golf together and they love it. I love seeing them bonding together and don't feel left out at all. Your dad won't mind a bit.

My parents are still alive and together. Mother's Day and Father's Day are the same, treated as family day, but only one of them gets a card and a small gift.