To do few activities with my 1 year old?

[daisydot22]

On maternity leave we did a few classes. Music, singing, play groups, library sessions and so on. Now she goes to nursery two days a week and on my days off we tend not to do a great deal. I have to catch up on housework and do the food shop. We walk a lot and go to the park. Now and then I'll meet friends for lunch or a coffee and she'll sit in a high chair. We sometimes go swimming or have a walk to the museum or art gallery but that's fairly rare. I sometimes worry that I'm not doing enough for her development.

At home she is a whirlwind and still too little to 'play' properly so she'll happily crawl about and look at toys but not do much with them. Likewise with books, she'll listen nicely for a minute then wants to be off.

I guess I'm wondering what you do with yours? Should I be doing more than taking her to Asda and Costa?!

I think you need to realise that this is a very temporary stage, once she is more mobile there’ll not be a lot of catching up on housework etc. So I think it’s fine while it lasts (I’d get bored and want to do a bit more though, personally)

I think you're probably right. Is there anything you could recommend to do with a 1 year old?

It's absolutely fine
Maybe the odd soft play visit thrown in there too. Love a soft play. Otherwise you're doing great- most kids just want to go to the park so if you go there a lot then that's good. Soon you'll be chasing round a bigger toddler and you'll probably do less housework and that's ok too.

Don’t forget that shopping is an experience if you are talking to your child about what’s doing on. Great opportunity to learn words.

Also throw in a bus trip or train ride once a week even if you drive. Great experience for children to learn about the world.

We were never off public transport- no car. Always took DS out of pram for that so he could see at window etc. Soft play, the local children’s centre had some good classes and a lovely little sensory room. Church playgroup was great. Liked having a bit of structure to the day but we mostly did naps at home unless it was a big day out somewhere. Ooh, the garden centre was a hit too.

Shopping is wildly stimulating for them at that age! Can you make swimming a weekly thing? I love taking mine swimming - it's fun bonding, it takes up a good chunk of time and they usually nap incredibly well afterwards!

My 18 month old goes to gymnastics, toddler sense, stay and play, rhythm time and little movers every week in term time. Gymnastics and toddler sense are the only ones that are still on through school holidays. We also go to soft play, other play areas, the library, swimming and the park. We’ve been busy doing classes most days since he was 3 weeks old though as I can’t just stay in all day 🤷‍♀️

It’s totally fine. She just needs you. She’s quite happy and you have things to do. At this age they are a bit like handbags - you can bring them most places.

I think it really depends on the child.

Mine would get really bored not doing a lot. We go to three or four classes a week, swimming, cooking, shopping, the library, soft play a LOT. We go for a walk most days, and usually the park and a coffee shop. We read books, and he likes to play - finding 'games' that keep his attention at any given moment can be a challenge but there's usually something. Right now he loves to mix things, last week he loved building things, we've had a "find the x" phase too.

Go with it if you're both happy for now. I suspect you may find you've got less time for housework soon though, and your highchair days may come to an end!

It's easier when the weather cheers up and you can take her to the park, playground, farm etc. It's much harder in the winter when everything indoors is expensive and not necessarily suitable for a 1yo

I think keeping things on the downlow is quite sensible.

With my first, I only ever did things in the morning - usually children’s centre groups. With my second, her nanny does quite a lot with her but, on my days, I don’t do much - housework, walks in the garden, a croissant in the cafe.

Lockdown changed my perspective, I think. My ds was so happy at home - it really was just proximity to his parents that he needed.

Totally fine. Pootling around pulling every tissue out of the box is just as stimulating an experience for them at that age as going to a museum

I do exactly the same as you when my child isn't at nursery.

The food shop, strolls to the shops and park. TV. Playing. Journeys to and from school to pick up older siblings. Just normal life.

I did the classes with my first and I don't miss them 😂 tbh I don't think young toddlers even care anyway, they really just want their family at that age. Personally I think they're more about meeting other mums and money making for the businesses.

Nursery will be giving her all the socialisation she needs.

I’ll add that we live in a flat, smallish, no garden. People tend to forget about that scenario when they say things like ‘oh we were so happy just staying at home…’ because they probably do not live in a flat sand garden with a small but lively child.

• SANS

I have a 1 year old who goes to nursery three days while I work, so I have him at home the other two.

We’re quite similar to you. We’ll go to Tesco, Starbucks, Pets at Home etc. I get shopping done and he seems to really enjoy the crowds, noises, colours etc.

We go to soft play too, while the weather is as bad as it’s been. If the weather is ok we’ll go to the park to feed the ducks.

I hate being stuck at home so getting out at some point every day is essential. I think we both need it.

I think there's so much pressure to join organised clubs and groups that we forget how stimulating everyday activities are. Things don't need to be expensive or structured for them to learn and grow. Walks in nature, shopping, trips to the park, singing songs and dancing, ridings scooters, playing in the garden, public transport, seeing new places, these are all extremely stimulating for a 1-2 year old.

I'm not bothered with structured groups until the free things get boring. Surely this is the age when we DONT need to go crazy with various expensive clubs?!

I have a 1.5 year old and a 4 year old. I agree with the others... to be honest, I found that attending groups etc. was mostly for my own sanity (to talk to another adult during the day) than for the child(ren). Soft plays and groups are great, but so are shopping trips, "helping" in the house or garden, etc. A trip to the garden centre can last hours, especially if there's a pet shop/aquatic centre or cafe (or all of the above)! Shopping or outings to the park is all stimulating.... meeting other people, counting trees, collecting leaves (bonus points for leaf painting afterwards), looking at the wildlife, etc.

My 1yo DS's week goes like this:
Mondays - with DH and our DD4 whilst I work (usually from home). This is a recent change. So far they've been to the 'gymnastics' group at the trampoline park, and a children's centre group which did songs, free play and craft, or just pottered about at home and went food shopping/done errands etc.
Tuesdays - nursery whilst me and DH both work.
Wednesdays - as above.
Thursdays - I'm off with the kids. We usually go to a church playgroup in the morning. Come home and have lunch. Sometimes we visit my DPs in the afternoons, or pop to local shops for food shopping/errands, or just potter around at home. We will start going the park a lot when the weather improves.
Fridays - again I'm off with the kids. We go to a different church playgroup in the morning. And then afternoons as above again. Occasionally we go to a cafe for lunch or cake with friends with similar aged kids.

Weekends are usually spent as a family. We potter at home, go food shopping/run errands, visit family on both sides at their houses or they come to us. When the weather improves we will spend a lot of time in parks. Occasionally go out for lunch to a cafe or Macdonald's or for cake. Occasionally do soft play or go in to town for the museum/art/gallery/library. Sometimes go to local library.

I think what you do is fine but personally I don't enjoy being home much with my kids, we all prefer to be out as much as poss!

Depends on the child but I'm like pp, I like to get out and about every day with my toddler. I prefer weekly organised classes as it's a good routine - we do swimming classes, gymnastics, gymboree, messy play and a music class. Other things we do include soft play, parks, library and city farms. Means she's tired in the afternoon and has a nice long nap when I get chores and errands done. The problem with taking her shopping or taking her along to cafes is that she can't explore freely and I'd have to keep her strapped in her buggy, so she wouldn't burn off any energy.

I think it’s more about language than anything else. So you could learn more in costa than you might at some of these all singing all dancing baby classes. I go to a pay as you go toddler class now every odd Wednesday and it makes me feel a bit better! We go swimming maybe once a month or something and go to visit family. He does get fed up now (18m) just milling about the house all day. I can tell the longer I leave him the more trouble he seems to find to get up to! I think if she’s going to nursery she’ll be covering loads of stuff that he isn’t

I look back at our swimming pool visits with DD fondly, she LOVED the water. Library, church playgroup, park, wander around museums and galleries more for me to than her. Nice times.

With my first I felt the need to do a thousand organised activities and keep busy all the time.

With my second I still did a few and she attended some with the older one.

With my 3rd we do as little as possible on the days she's not at the childminder. We're both very happy pottering around the house, popping to the shops etc. That desire to be out and about constantly having organised fun has totally disappeared.

Talk talk and more talk - language acquisition is SO important important.
It will help her greatly when she starts school.