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Original poster

Parents of university age children never got ANY free childcare

378 replies

Cliff1975 · 15/03/2023 08:05

Whilst it is great that the government has finally realised that free childcare is needed those of us with university age children did not benefit from this and we are now supporting them through uni at great expense. Maybe once these kids who are getting free childcare get to uni that will be free too? Just can't help feeling that we are missing out from all angles?

OP posts:
CandlelightGlow · 15/03/2023 10:10

Cliff1975 · 15/03/2023 08:05

Whilst it is great that the government has finally realised that free childcare is needed those of us with university age children did not benefit from this and we are now supporting them through uni at great expense. Maybe once these kids who are getting free childcare get to uni that will be free too? Just can't help feeling that we are missing out from all angles?

Is this even accurate? I grew up on a council estate and I know that me and all my siblings went to the onsite school nursery for free! For the year or so before school start age.

Also, economic climates change. Even 20 years ago it was more possible for families to get by on one salary. Social housing was more available. The desperate need for affordable childcare is symptomatic of a society where general life is simply less affordable.

Also also, affordable childcare goes towards modelling societies that have stronger work forces and overall happier citizens. Why wouldn't we aim for that? No one is seriously going to justify resistance to improvement based on the fact that those changes didn't materially benefit them, surely? Oh wait, I guess we do have a tory government..

girlswillbegirls · 15/03/2023 10:11

I don't understand your way of thinking OP.

I struggled (like you) without free childcare. Its great that the next generation won't have to struggle. Great for all young women. And also grate for OUR own children, they won't have to put up with what we did.

It's good for everyone.

FVFrog · 15/03/2023 10:11

Yes OP is incorrect, my 3 year old (now 24!) got 15 free hours. And as a society we should all be supporting affordable childcare, it benefits everyone!

MarshaBradyo · 15/03/2023 10:11

Cliff1975 · 15/03/2023 09:40

Yes i got free university which I am grateful for. I don't begrudge this help with childcare to others at all. Just pondering really. Expectations in life have certainly changed, my parents generation had cheaper housing but they saved for things and didn't expect things straightaway. They were married a few years before they had a washing machine. Now we have a generation where phones, foreign holidays, meals out etc are all seen as necessities.

Free university was pretty good

Ds is going to university next year and I think he did get 15 hours

30 hours recently for age 3 has been great for us with dd

I did have a lurch back to crazy costs over £100 day, presenteeism so no wfh and barely any flexibility but overall swings and roundabouts

Other things are harder now than they were a decade or so ago - housing / energy etc

PuddlesPityParty · 15/03/2023 10:12

OP I don’t get attitudes like this. It probs will benefit your kids when they they have children. Equally, you got free university education. Those with young children now probs did not.

Why is it a bad thing for society to improve and get better? Be grateful the future is somewhat improving for your children.

prescribingmum · 15/03/2023 10:14

Squamata · 15/03/2023 10:07

They were married a few years before they had a washing machine. Now we have a generation where phones, foreign holidays, meals out etc are all seen as necessities.

I get really pissed off when I hear this kind of thing. It's always focused on younger generations. What are you OP, 50s? Guess what - you probably expect to have a phone, holidays and meals out where people your age a generation or two ago wouldn't have had them.

You also benefit from advances in medical science which mean life span has been lengthened considerably. My grandfather died in his 50s back in the 1970s, he had cancer and the treatment then was basically to sit you on a ward and give you a bit of morphine at the end. People in their 50s today expect more and would have a much better chance of survival but you don't hear people whinging on about that, do you?

So yes, youth is in many ways better (not financial stability, environment etc) and middle age and old age are also in many ways better. That's fucking progress. Be glad of it.

This hits the nail on the head!

OP why don't you voluntarily give up everything you have that is better than your parents generation?! Seeing as they apparently had their priorities straight compared to those that followed🙄

PuddlesPityParty · 15/03/2023 10:14

You also need to remember your generation were much luckier in terms of getting on the housing ladder and what not. Something needed to change for current generations to have even a chance.

Blossomtoes · 15/03/2023 10:14

Free university - from which I benefited - wasn’t an unmitigated social benefit. It meant that only 5% or so of the population had access to it.

x2boys · 15/03/2023 10:14

eyeslikebutterflies · 15/03/2023 10:09

This is absolutely true. I'm probs the same age as you, OP. I paid/worked my way through Uni (I was the first year the grants stopped, though no tuition fees), but then benefitted from incredibly low living costs, being able to buy a house in my early 20s, a student loan I was able to pay back in my early 30s, and relatively low childcare costs when my kids were little (plus some free provision).

Today, people are hammered by insane living costs, much, much higher childcare costs, a level of university debt I find staggering, and as for getting on the housing ladder....

I agree that university education should be free, but if there's money swilling about I'd rather it be spent on the young, than on 'repaying' the costs I paid when I was younger.

Show quote history

But when university education was free there were considerably less students going to university,there are over 50% of post 18 year olds attending university now who do you think should pay for it?

Iamsodonewith2020 · 15/03/2023 10:15

I am going to got shot down for this but I think it’s a bad idea and typical of what is expected of a generation who think that having children shouldn’t mean a sacrifice for your current lifestyle. We only had the 15 hours free childcare that had to be taken either 9-12 or 12.30-3.30. We didn’t get to choose either, we just got whicheverslot was available. We sacrificed holidays, second car, take always, meals out and expensive day trips were for birthdays and special occasions. If you want to have children then I am afraid their will be sacrifices to be made! My sons female friend was annoyed the other day as her parents won’t look after her baby 4 days a week (for nothing!) and she had banked on it when she planned her return to work whilst pregnant! Strangely enough they want to enjoy their retirement and spend time with their grandchild because they want to not because their daughter expects it!!

savethewales · 15/03/2023 10:15

Cliff1975 · 15/03/2023 09:40

Yes i got free university which I am grateful for. I don't begrudge this help with childcare to others at all. Just pondering really. Expectations in life have certainly changed, my parents generation had cheaper housing but they saved for things and didn't expect things straightaway. They were married a few years before they had a washing machine. Now we have a generation where phones, foreign holidays, meals out etc are all seen as necessities.

So you’ve had benefits others don’t. You’ll also have benefitted from cheaper housing than those with nursery age children, as well as cheaper education to put you in better stead to get a higher paying job.

Equimum · 15/03/2023 10:16

Personally, I suspect university fees will continue to rise, and so what people with small children are gaining at present, will be paid back in fees at a later stage.

Owlatnight · 15/03/2023 10:17

Housing was generally less expensive and took up less income. Also the retirement age for women was still 60 so it was easier to get help from grannies

savethewales · 15/03/2023 10:17

Iamsodonewith2020 · 15/03/2023 10:15

I am going to got shot down for this but I think it’s a bad idea and typical of what is expected of a generation who think that having children shouldn’t mean a sacrifice for your current lifestyle. We only had the 15 hours free childcare that had to be taken either 9-12 or 12.30-3.30. We didn’t get to choose either, we just got whicheverslot was available. We sacrificed holidays, second car, take always, meals out and expensive day trips were for birthdays and special occasions. If you want to have children then I am afraid their will be sacrifices to be made! My sons female friend was annoyed the other day as her parents won’t look after her baby 4 days a week (for nothing!) and she had banked on it when she planned her return to work whilst pregnant! Strangely enough they want to enjoy their retirement and spend time with their grandchild because they want to not because their daughter expects it!!

Oh fuck off. Typical of a generation who are expected to fund the higher cost of living, higher cost of housing, higher cost of childcare and save for a pension every month as the chances of a state pension being available are slim to none.
I’ve a two year old and I’m expected to raise a family like I don’t have work and work like I don’t have a family. We are making more than our fair share of sacrifices.

Fifi0000 · 15/03/2023 10:18

Politics of envy, they could equally say you will be getting a pension many of the young now won't get as good pension or they will be expected to work until they drop.

ReneBumsWombats · 15/03/2023 10:19

Iamsodonewith2020 · 15/03/2023 10:15

I am going to got shot down for this but I think it’s a bad idea and typical of what is expected of a generation who think that having children shouldn’t mean a sacrifice for your current lifestyle. We only had the 15 hours free childcare that had to be taken either 9-12 or 12.30-3.30. We didn’t get to choose either, we just got whicheverslot was available. We sacrificed holidays, second car, take always, meals out and expensive day trips were for birthdays and special occasions. If you want to have children then I am afraid their will be sacrifices to be made! My sons female friend was annoyed the other day as her parents won’t look after her baby 4 days a week (for nothing!) and she had banked on it when she planned her return to work whilst pregnant! Strangely enough they want to enjoy their retirement and spend time with their grandchild because they want to not because their daughter expects it!!

Why do you think that free childcare to enable people to work will mean parents never making any sacrifices for their children? Is that the extent of lifestyle change in parenthood in your experience?

Why should parents make sacrifices that aren't necessary?

Your post really reads like the standard "I had to so everyone else in future should always have to" stuff, masquerading as selfless parenting.

Whichwhatnow · 15/03/2023 10:20

I hate this race to the bottom/'doesn't benefit me so why should I pay' shit.

I don't have (and will never have) kids. I'm a higher rate taxpayer and use minimal public services. I could be bitter that 'my' tax money is being spent on childcare, and schooling, and NHS resources, and benefits. But I'm not, because I want to live in a society that helps those who need it. I would happily pay more tax if it meant we got improved public services!

Tbh I'm more likely to be a bit bitter that the previous generation had it so much easier with housing and free university 😆 (I'm not btw, increased social mobility has meant that I have a job that most people from my background couldn't even dream of in my parents' generation - as others have said, it's swings and roundabouts!).

Blossomtoes · 15/03/2023 10:20

Equimum · 15/03/2023 10:16

Personally, I suspect university fees will continue to rise, and so what people with small children are gaining at present, will be paid back in fees at a later stage.

If that’s the case the graduate population will fall dramatically. Already kids approaching the end of secondary education are beginning to question the value of a degree that potentially leaves them £50k in debt. It’s already eroded social mobility.

Bunnycat101 · 15/03/2023 10:22

I have a 4yo. I absolutely do not get free childcare. I get subsidised hours for 38 weeks of the year. My daily rate without the subsidy is £84 a day.

Students are adults who ultimately can get jobs to support themselves. I don’t agree with the levels of debt or the way interest is applied it is arguably more affordable whereas childcare for under 5s is quite clearly needed to enable parents to work and to keep a roof over their heads.

Keepupandout · 15/03/2023 10:22

I don't begrudge anyone free childcare, even if I didn't benefit from it myself. And I hope that university charges will be done away with, as well.

I have no idea how this will be resourced, anyway. There will be a rise in demand for nursery places for 1 year olds, and who is going to fill those jobs?

Hope it works out, but don't expect anyone in the Tory government has figured out how to make it work in practice.

Throwncrumbs · 15/03/2023 10:23

LiftyLift · 15/03/2023 08:13

It’s not a race to the bottom.

You would have benefited from cheaper house prices than people getting on the ladder now as they have young kids.

We didn’t benefit from cheaper houses, our salaries were lower, we had to pay for child care, we didn’t get UC to top up our money, so stop with that crap!

NewNovember · 15/03/2023 10:25

gemloving · 15/03/2023 08:11

I don't understand the negativity around it. Positive change for the future.

Why can same sex couples now be married? Because we fought for their right. Positive change, people were imprisoned until 1968.

Why can women vote? Because others sacrificed themselves for that right.

Why do most women have the rights they have now, because us women didn't and they fought for it and I will always thank the previous generations for their hard work.

It's not personal, it's about the bigger picture and positive change for future generations and especially working women.

You can't see anything negative anount one year olds being away from their primary care giver for long periods of time? Being a sahm will no becaome a luxury of the very wealthy. House prices will further rise as more women will be expected in the work force. There are so many negatives this government wants children away from families as young an age as possible.

passmethedettol · 15/03/2023 10:26

I hear you OP it leaves a sting for us too having just missed out and with the cost of living hammering us. No cheap houses, gold plated pensions or free uni for us either! Life is not fair but remember its only an extension of the 30 free hours term time - if you work full time that’s only approx 22 hours a week (and we had to subsidise those since the government funding per hour was less than the nursery cost!). So parents will still be left with a massive bill sadly - at our nursery it only took a quarter off.

Squamata · 15/03/2023 10:28

Iamsodonewith2020 · 15/03/2023 10:15

I am going to got shot down for this but I think it’s a bad idea and typical of what is expected of a generation who think that having children shouldn’t mean a sacrifice for your current lifestyle. We only had the 15 hours free childcare that had to be taken either 9-12 or 12.30-3.30. We didn’t get to choose either, we just got whicheverslot was available. We sacrificed holidays, second car, take always, meals out and expensive day trips were for birthdays and special occasions. If you want to have children then I am afraid their will be sacrifices to be made! My sons female friend was annoyed the other day as her parents won’t look after her baby 4 days a week (for nothing!) and she had banked on it when she planned her return to work whilst pregnant! Strangely enough they want to enjoy their retirement and spend time with their grandchild because they want to not because their daughter expects it!!

@Iamsodonewith2020 By 'a sacrifice of your current lifestyle' do you mean continuing to go out to work in a job that just about keeps you out of the food bank? Because that's why people need childcare, they're not using it to cover them while they go out drinking cocktails on roof terraces.

I don't think anyone has children without it changing their lifestyle (maybe unless they're rich enough to afford to get a nanny to do everything).

Having a SAHM is increasingly impossible because it's much harder to live as a single income household now - prices have outstripped wages, it's as simple as that. If you had 15 hours free childcare, I'd imagine you were a SAHM so you weren't working in those 15 hours, unless you had younger children.

Childcare is available to those who are working - so you take care of kids in the morning, drop at childcare so you can work, resume childcare straight after work. Whereas it sounds like you had chunks of government-funded time to yourself to do the washing and have a coffee? Sounds like a nice lifestyle to me!

Abra1t · 15/03/2023 10:28

It's not crap: house price to salary ratio was lower in the early 2000s. In the UK it was about 3.75 on average then and now it's about 4.7. In London it was about 6.5 and now it's 11. Here are the graphs.

www.economicshelp.org/blog/5568/housing/uk-house-price-affordability/