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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

I'm not ready to finish with my counsellor

2 replies

pinkorangegreen · 14/03/2023 19:02

The counsellor I have been going to for over a year recently unexpectedly told me she's taking an extended break from work, possibly for the rest of the year. I really like her and we'd been working through some deep childhood trauma.

Obviously I knew we'd have to end at some point, but I thought it would be when I was ready and at a point in therapy where I felt I'd come to some sort of conclusion with my issues. I'm really sad about it all and I'm a bit shaken because I felt that having my counsellor gave me some consistency and grounded me in the middle of working through a lot of painful stuff. I understand my counsellor's reasons but it's still really hard for me. At work I was thinking about how I'm not ready to finish with her yet and I got quite tearful just thinking about it. I know I could go to a different therapist but I can't really contemplate that right now. I would have to go through everything again, plus explain to the new counsellor what I'd done with the old one, plus it wouldn't be my counsellor.

I'm not ready and it feels unfair that the decision has been taken out of my hands. I'm not angry with her and I like her a lot but it's hard.

OP posts:
Corcomroe · 14/03/2023 19:04

I can imagine it’s hard, but obviously there are two people in the therapist’s room, and both have needs. In your shoes I would address it in your last sessions with her, and also ask for recommendations for someone who works similarly, to whom you might go.

Dontforgetaboutit · 14/03/2023 19:29

I feel for you. I see my counsellor every week and have only been going for the last 5 months but the thought of stopping terrifies me so can only imagine how hard it is for you having been given that news. I totally understand how it would be hard to start with someone else. Maybe you could think of it in terms of someone new could bring you some new ideas/ a different point of view?
Sending you best wishes.

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