Handed in my notice at a job I'm miserable in, so why do I feel so sad and anxious?

[resignationblues]

I handed in my notice today at a job that isn't a good fit for me, I've pushed through it for over a year and it's not got any better and I finally plucked up the courage to hand in my notice after the last few weeks have made me realise I don't have a future there.

I told my manager in a call, and he was really surprised and taken aback. He's not been my manager for long, but seemed sad and I felt so guilty even though I know this must happen all the time. I've followed it up in writing but not had a response to the email yet. I'm not sure who has been told that I'm leaving, so I'm on edge whilst I wait for them to announce it and feel guilty and awkward when colleagues make references to deadlines or events that will happen once I've left as they don't know I'll not be there for them.

I thought I'd feel peace and relief, but I feel anxious and like I've made a mistake, even though logically I know I haven't. I also feel awkward as my notice period is shorter than my manager was expecting, I don't know if it's a mistake in my contract but I don't want to make things difficult

Not sure what I'm even asking for here, but AIBU to feel sad and anxious resigning even though I know it's the right decision?

Very normal to feel like this. Make a bulleted list of all the reasons why you're resigning then you can look at it each time you start feeling sad/guilty. You feel sad/guilty because you are a nice person, not necessarily because the people you work with are nice - remember that!

Maybe you are anxious because you haven’t got a new job yet? Normally, when you leave a job it’s because of an exciting new thing that’s about to happen such as new job, moving away etc and you don’t have that. You might be sad because you had high hopes for this job and it’s not turned out that way.

Is it worth talking to your manager about why you aren’t happy and asking if any changes could be made so you would be happier and stay?

I never anticipated how stressful handing in my notice would be. I thought I'd feel relived afterwards but I feel even worse, my stomach is in a constant ball of knots as I've been waiting for my department head to contact me about it, and waiting for it to be announced that I'm leaving and all the ripples out that will cause.

I think this is a sign that you made the right decision to leave. Every single interaction in this place is giving you anxiety. Plus women are conditioned to feel guilty for prioritising their own needs over others.

Your colleagues are randoms who you never have to see again. Onwards and upwards.

I felt the same as you when I recently handed in my notice for a company that I was at for over a year, I was overworked underpaid and most definitely taken the piss out of. I wasn’t seeing my dc and was just plain ole miserable waking up in the morning, when I handed my notice in I cried my eyes out, but knew I done the right thing.

I didn’t have another job to go to so was very worried about that, however 3 weeks later I’ve left there and have started a new job, which is only temporary but it gives me time to relax and look for something that I really want to do and I am much happier, as are my dc who actually get to see me rather than being like ships passing in the night.

You will find something else, forget it and move on. Good luck.

I think it's normal to feel that way. I left a job that was soul destroying...it was so bad that I left without another job offer. Luckily I found a much better job a few weeks after my last day.