DS had a go at me about something fairly minor recently, she pretty regularly does this. I love her to pieces but she’s very certain of her convictions and isn’t opposed to expressing them. Nothing major, just a minor character flaw that’s a tad tedious and irritating. But, as above, I love her to pieces and she has a whole range of wonderful aspects to her personality so I tend to just nod politely and pretend to agree with her comments. DM does not usually nod politely so that is why they frequently butt heads. The only other issue in our relationship is that I tend to have to initiate all contact and she only reaches out if she wants something.
Recently, DSis “called me out” again on something that had nothing to do with her and I wasn’t in the best place to nod politely (I’m undergoing a cancer investigation and had a colonoscopy booked that day). I responded saying that I thought she was being hypocritical because she’s previously not done the thing she was telling me to do, and listed examples. She responded ignoring all the examples where I had witnessed it first hand and denied the one where my DH had witnessed and told me (essentially accusing my DH of lying). I usually initiate all communication (between me and her but also more widely in the family) so I haven’t had any communication from her since and there haven’t been any group calls either. She called me out in the group chat and, as yet, no one has responded to her but my DM told her that she thinks she was in the wrong and other family members I’ve spoken to have all said to me they don’t think I was wrong (obviously, I don’t know what anyone has said to her). Regardless, she hasn’t spoken to me since.
DN’s birthday is coming up and DSis is having a party. I know he’s having a party because DM told me DSis was planning to have one. I asked DSis when I next spoke to her (back before we stopped talking - when she’d called me to ask if I could dog sit for her) and she confirmed that she was planning a party but no details were given. The next I hear about it is from DM who is telling me that my DSis is upset because I’ve not responded to her invite to DN’s party and I’m the bad guy! She’s not even invited me - there’s been no invite for me to respond to!!
I know it’s petty and I’ve already bought DN a gift and I know that I’ll end up going (because I’m sure DM will share the details) but AIBU to just be a little bit peeved that I’m the bad guy again when all I’ve done is not initiate contact?