My 3 year old's tantrums are really really really testing my patience.
Almost any time he does not get his own way, a massive tantrum ensues.
I try to stay calm, but after an entire day of it, I'm starting to really struggle to stay calm.
Getting him ready for preschool is difficult. He's not happy to get ready and cries and screams while we are getting ready. He's happy once he's there.
Every day he comes home and he's unhappy and grumpy as soon as we get in. It's always something, for example he gets out of the car and decides he wants to get back in and pretend to drive / or he wants to walk around outside the house of whatever it may be. By the time he's inside, he's always having a tantrum.
He's then ok for a bit and the throws another tantrum if he wants to do something in the kitchen he's not allowed to do. For example he wants to ' help ' while I'm cooking. So I let him have a look and maybe stir a couple of things. I sometimes let him put ingredients in while we cook. But then we just need to leave the food alone to cook and he wants to carry on and has a tantrum about that.
He then often gets upset and has a tantrum about getting ready for bed/ brushing teeth / bath time. He doesn't want to do that.
When we go to the playground and have to leave, more often than not, he goes completely nuts because he wants to keep playing.
It's better some days, but some days it's really relentless.
I think he is tired sometimes. But he does have quite a solid routine. Occasionally he wakes up early or he may wake up in the night and that can result in more tantrums the next day.
He loves to just say no to everything at the moment.
How can I get through to him ? I am so extremely patient. I validate his feelings. ' I know you're sad because you want to keep playing ' etc etc. but when will this get easier ? His language has improved so much and he's able to tell me why he's upset. But he still just finds it so hard when he can't do what he wants.
Can anyone help ?
He has no tantrums at preschool and they have no concerns. He follows instructions / boundaries etc there. But I really struggle with him at home some days.
My husband says I'm not strict enough and need to tell him to stop more. Whenever I do tell him to stop, things just escalate. I usually try to distract him and or label his feelings but sometimes nothing helps at all. It's really sad because I feel like he's sad a lot and I don't know how to help him. It's made me really sad today and I just feel broken and like a really bad mum.