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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To not like my new manager?

4 replies

dntt · 10/03/2023 19:18

I've been at my company for 2 years and recently got a new manager, and I find them really patronising and difficult. I was talking to them about an online training I have been doing recently which is technically for the role above mine, but my previous manager had told me to do it as it would be useful. As I was speaking about it, my manager interrupted and said 'I don't think you should be doing this yet, I mean we haven't promoted you!' and then started talking about why I haven't been promoted and how I have a 'big gap' in my skills if I do want to be promoted. I get where they are coming from, but I found myself feeling really embarrassed.

Another example is I had a week of holiday booked. I had gone through all the processes for it to be approved, had put it on my colleagues calendars and regularly reminded my colleagues as it approached. It should have been factored into deadlines already, and if it wasn't I would just hand over my tasks to another colleague. I was in a team meeting and mentioned my holiday and my manager came off mute and in front of the whole team went on and one about how I need to be proactive about telling colleagues when I'm off, and how my projects are my own responsibility and I need to communicate more with my team about my annual leave. I don't know what more I could have done, and I don't know why they spoke to me like that in the middle of a team meeting.

I don't know if I'm being overly sensitive, they seem likeable at first and are well-liked by my other colleagues but I find them really difficult to work with.

OP posts:
RoseslnTheHospital · 10/03/2023 19:20

Had you told your manager about your holiday as well as your colleagues? I would presume you had, as they would have to be involved in authorising it?

dntt · 10/03/2023 19:22

RoseslnTheHospital · 10/03/2023 19:20

Had you told your manager about your holiday as well as your colleagues? I would presume you had, as they would have to be involved in authorising it?

Yeah, it had been authorised by them as well as the senior members of the team

OP posts:
RoseslnTheHospital · 10/03/2023 19:23

Did you manage to interrupt your manager and point out that you had been proactive in informing people of your holiday and that this was simply another reminder, not the first time you'd mentioned it?

Yazo · 10/03/2023 19:27

They sound very annoying! I've had managers like that, some always try to keep you down or belittle you. Keep your chin up, do the training, go for a promotion..you don't need the permission (even if technically you do i.e to apply internally there's nothing to stop you hopping into a new job somewhere else)

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