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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not walk my dog at the minute?

115 replies

BourbonBon · 08/03/2023 08:34

I really want to but she’s in season. She’s already a very reactive dog so I don’t think I should? But she’s desperate to go for a walk 😞 it’s snowing and I so want to take her out in it 😭

YABU - walk her
YANBU - you can’t

OP posts:
Original poster
BourbonBon · 08/03/2023 14:39

Sassyfox · 08/03/2023 14:36

I agree with @KarmaStar about pyometra.

I know 3 dogs who have died from it and it’s not a pain free experience.
2 of them got to the vet and were treated but still died and 1 had to be put to sleep immediately because of how much pain she was in.

I’d spend some time getting her used to a muzzle and then once she’s comfortable with it then book her in to have it done.
They’re under anaesthetic most of the time anyway.

She is already muzzle trained, no way we’d get through a vet appointment without it

I will get her spayed after this season, as long as I can get sedation before we go in

OP posts:
Clymene · 08/03/2023 14:42

I wonder if you could get the vet to come out to your car and give her light sedation and then wheel her in to sedate her fully?

I think it's so wet at the moment that any scent won't linger long.

WiddlinDiddlin · 08/03/2023 14:44

KarmaStar · 08/03/2023 14:23

Hi op
Put a covering on her for bitches in season put her on a lead and go out.Is there somewhere quiet locally?
About the speying,please do it.
I had a a dog,a rescue so I don't know his history,but he was very very anti vet.
But required check ups and treatment so he went in having had a slight sedative from the vet first which I collected the previous day.
you dog,if not neutered,can get
Pyometra
.This can lead to kidney failure and if not found and treated,is fatal.
Have a lovely walk in the snow and please consider speying.🐾🐾🌈

How does her bitch pee/poo with a nappy on?

Are you aware that putting pants on bitches in-season may increase the risk of infection?

Unless these pants form some sort of cast iron chastity belt, they will not prevent a keen dog from doing the deed, if she is willing...

Pyometra is an infection of the womb - an open pyo can potentially be cured with antibiotics (though you'd still be wise to spay the bitch once sorted), a closed pyo can be fatal within a few days for a variety of reasons (ruptured uterus, sepsis) I wouldn't get hung up on kidney failure.

Berating the OP about her bitch not yet being spayed when at the minute, it would be really unwise to spay (again, spay 3 months after the start of the season to catch her mid cycle when hormones are 'normal', you'd only spay mid season in a dire emergency!) is not useful, and pretty unkind.

There are good reasons for not spaying until a bitch is mature, and it is possible to have an entire bitch and still be a responsible owner, which it sounds as though the OP is.

LosingMyPancakes · 08/03/2023 14:58

Which rescue did you get her from? If aggression is a problem they should absolutely be supporting you - especially if they've not done her before adopting out, which is highly unusual!

gogohmm · 08/03/2023 15:13

Keep her on a lead and avoid places where dogs are off lead eg parks and fields. Choose a quiet time of day.

Boohisspiss · 08/03/2023 15:24

Bonk it in the head, drive at high speed to the vets and get its bits sorted.

CrotchetyCrocheting · 08/03/2023 15:28

noimaginationforausername · 08/03/2023 11:12

I was just thinking this, why are so many dogs at the moment "reactive" or aggressive? Who the fuck wants these dogs in their house? It must be exhausting.

My friends dog hates all other dogs and can be aggressive, it's miserable and she's not mine but I fine walking with them really stressful.

Show quote history

My dog is reactive. She's an anxious rescue. All she does at the vets is shake uncontrollably with fear, at home she is just like any other dog. She isn't reactive with us. The only thing that she is reactive to is big dogs and all that means is that she barks. She's a lovely wee dog who is just really scared sometimes, I can't imagine her not in my house.

ItsCalledAConversation · 08/03/2023 15:30

SnowLemons · 08/03/2023 08:43

Is this a thing? If a dog has a season (is that a period?!) They can't go out? Seems cruel.

I love these kind of posts. “Seems cruel”. What an informed viewpoint.

OP, you can take your dog out, either choose a remote path you 100% won’t see anyone else, or keep her firmly on lead and don’t let her within a sniff of any other dogs. She can’t get pregnant via thought rays, droplets or osmosis, she had to actually get shagged by another dog in broad daylight…it sounds a bit like you might not be able to handle her. So when you say she is “reactive”, do you mean she is out of control?

longtompot · 08/03/2023 15:53

I don't know if it's the same for dogs but our cat was given Gabapentin by her vets to calm her down before even trying to put her in a cat basket. Currently we have to use our dogs medium sized crate! Our issue is she isn't a cat who you can give treats to so trying to disguise her meds is very difficult.

I hope you find a solution for your dogs fear @BourbonBon My dog, cocker spaniel, is fearful of the vets but not to the point she attacks, she just shakes and tries to find a way out. Her current vet just picks her up when she comes out to get her. We have had nurses at other vet practises suggest she wear a muzzle, and this was when she was 9 or so months old. We moved her to a different vets at that point as I didn't have faith in them.

Lavender14 · 08/03/2023 16:04

Unless you can rent a space and guarantee she won't be around other dogs then you can't walk her, dogs will literally jump fences out of their back gardens to get to her so don't put them or her in that position. Lots of puzzle games in the house for stimulation will help.

Mumofone2021 · 08/03/2023 16:16

My dog is in season, she was actually booked in to be spayed in a couple of weeks but came into season really early.
i am an experienced dog owner. Please, if you can exercise your bitch in the garden or home then do so. You may find she actually doesn’t even want to go out too much. It’s dangerous for male dogs if you go out as they will bolt off lead to get to her.
I have let the dog owners in our village know (we have a Facebook group) as she will be in the garden. It affects other dogs a lot more than you could ever realise.

CountryParsonPetal · 08/03/2023 16:31

As the owner of male dogs, I feel pretty pissed off when people walk their bitches whilst in season. My very sensible and calm boy loses all his common sense when there is a female dog on heat within a quarter mile radius! One of my regular afternoon dog walking companions had a very near miss recently when her dog ran across a dual carriageway to follow a bitch on heat.

Your dog won't miss out on a few walks, just plan some enrichment activities to occupy her instead.

I can't imagine it would be much fun for you or your dog to be fighting off or worrying about unwanted attention.

MavisMcMinty · 08/03/2023 16:45

Bitches are most receptive to dogs on days 9 and 10 of their season, day 1 being the first day you notice blood spotting. For the other days, they are very unlikely to allow a random dog mount them in minutes, she’s likely to keep moving her back end away from him. But dogs will be able to smell her up to 3 miles away, and may be going insane with lust for her.

MavisMcMinty · 08/03/2023 16:46

…mad with lust for the full 3 weeks, I mean.

worried4698643 · 08/03/2023 16:46

I've seen a couple of PP saying 'hire a field' is this actually a thing ?

sunsetskys · 08/03/2023 16:50

I always walk my dogs in heat, it would be cruel not to. Never had a male dog mating with my female, at worst they get in their space and dance around them but you'd have to be blind and incapacitated to allow a dog to successfully tie with your female while she's right next to you. If people don't want their male dogs running off because they smell a bitch, perhaps they should neuter them 😇
To the spay crew, mine aren't done because they're gundogs and I don't want them getting fat and lazy without their sex hormones. Have had one case of pyometra after having dogs (mainly females) for 20 years and she was operated on and survived.

user1477249785 · 08/03/2023 16:51

OP I really feel for you. I have a fear reactive dog and it is hugely isolating and stressful. We have done everything recommended and spent thousands on behaviouralists. It's just the way he is.

Our vet has given us tablets that we give him in the three days before an appointment. They just about get him to the point that, alongside the muzzle, we can get him onto the vets table. So it is possible. Hang in there.

Justmeandthedog1 · 08/03/2023 16:56

BourbonBon · 08/03/2023 10:52

I decided against it, better safe than sorry.

for those who were asking, she isn’t spayed yet as she’s EXTREMELY vet fear aggressive. Just going in that place sends her loopy to the point where she wants to attack everyone in sight and pisses herself. It’s horrendous and traumatising for her (and everyone else). I’m looking into sedation that can be given at home so I can get her done but the vet is reluctant. I’m also concerned that having her spayed will make her even more aggressive.

I don’t think being spayed will make her more aggressive.
Re sedation, vets worry about giving you stuff to give them at home because their blood pressure can drop. Suggest you agree spaying with your vet, arrive with your dog. If vet can give you something by mouth for the dog you give this in the car, then carry dog in. It might be possible to initially sedate your dog in the car by injection as it’s in a muscle so a quick jab. I’ve seen a vet sedate feral cats going hammer and tongs through the wire of a cat trap. So quick to get the needle in and out without being attacked.
Spaying will reduce the risk of her getting pregnant, the hassle of coping with their season and also the risk of pyometra which can be horrendous ( and fatal)

ItWillWash · 08/03/2023 17:07

If people don't want their male dogs running off because they smell a bitch, perhaps they should neuter them

I have two neutered males and one entire bitch. We kept her entire as the breeder asked us to consider breeding her as her bitch was retiring.

She's in season currently and cannot be downstairs with the boys as one of them is driven to distraction by her. We've actually had to barricade the living room door to stop him from opening the door to get to her. If he can't see her/get to her he can settle but if she's around him he becomes very distressed.

Neutering takes away their ability but it can take months for it to take away the urge and even after years they can still smell and react to a bitch in season.

ProbablyDogNappersHunX · 08/03/2023 17:12

If people don't want their male dogs running off because they smell a bitch, perhaps they should neuter them

Mine was neutered about 5 years ago (before I got him). He remains very interested in bitches in heat.

It doesn't remove all the urges, it just removes the ability to impregnate.

019203847user · 08/03/2023 17:42

Hire a secure field

Is this a thing? How do you go about finding a secure field for hire for dog walking?

ItsCalledAConversation · 08/03/2023 18:05

019203847user · 08/03/2023 17:42

Hire a secure field

Is this a thing? How do you go about finding a secure field for hire for dog walking?

There’s this amazing website on the internet where you can find things that are local to you…have you heard of google?

Whammyyammy · 08/03/2023 18:12

TheFlis12345 · 08/03/2023 08:49

Please don’t do it. I would be less worried about your dog and more concerned about off lead male dogs in the area. My friends lovely dog was killed running across a road by a park to get to a bitch in season. He was normally exceptionally well behaved with perfect recall but the scent can drive them crazy.

Surely that's on your friend for nit having an obviously unpredictable dog off lead.

ItWillWash · 08/03/2023 18:17

@Whammyyammy You are underestimating the effect the scent of a bitch in season has on a dog. No dog can be trained not to run after bitches on heat. No matter how predictable or well-behaved they normally are.

ItWillWash · 08/03/2023 18:20

Also, you really don't expect to meet an in-season bitch while you're out. It's generally accepted by most dog owners that bitches will be kept inside until their season is finished. It's not fair on the dogs or the bitch to do otherwise.

I wouldn't even use a secure field. A very determined dog will not be put off or stopped by a fence if he picks up the scent of a bitch on heat. And if that doesn't happen the scent will linger in the field for hours. It wouldn't be fair to the next people to use the field.