Religious talk in school

[AnD4D]

I'm really sorry if this isn't the right place for this discussion. I only came here after writing and subsequently deleting an email I was planning on sending to my daughter's school.

Recently, I picked my 7yo daughter up from school, and noted that she was surprisingly quiet. Usually she's bouncy and chatty about what she's been up to.

Finally, at home, I sat her down and asked her what was wrong. She asked me if the world was going to explode. I was a little confused and asked what brought that on.

She told me that today, while learning about religion, her teacher blew up a balloon, held it up in front of the class, then said "This is the Earth. If God stopped existing..." then she let go of the balloon.

I know it's a small thing, and I feel petty, but it bothers me and wanted to get some thoughts on it.

Personally, I don't consider myself a believer, but my wife is, and we always agreed that we would teach our daughter about all faiths and thoughts on the subject of religion.

For example, I will never say "God doesn't exist" but rather "I don't know if God exists." and my wife would say the same but add on "...but I like to believe that he does."

I'm perfectly fine with this, but to have a teacher, someone I've encouraged my daughter to learn from, express their faith in such a definitive way has me concerned. On top of that, the fact that I've expressed my feelings on the subject has caused my daughter anxiety because she seems to think the world's about to explode.

Following on from this, my daughter said she'd been worried for a while, because the week before, the teacher told her that if God died, time would stop, and we'd all freeze forever.

Honestly, I'm not sure what to do about this. My wife told me to just let it go, and that we should tell our daughter that her teacher doesn't know everything and is wrong about the world exploding, but I would hate to put the idea into her head that she shouldn't listen to her teacher.

Again, sorry if this is the wrong place. It's just been on my mind for a while now.

Tell the teacher to stop spreading outdated and unproven hearsay

Tell them there's no proof god exists, and it's just a fantasy made up thing like Father Xmas and the tooth Fairy and how come nobody has ever seen this imaginary man?

Tell them that you only want your child to be taught scientifically proven facts.

Does your daughter go to a religious school?
I think you need to find out exactly what has said to your daughter.

I don't really understand what the problem is. You can always explain that different people have different viewpoints?

"This is the Earth. If God stopped existing..." then she let go of the balloon.
My dc go to a Catholic school and they wouldn't even come out with something that daft there!

The problem is with a teacher, in a position of authority and trust with these kids, is teaching them this nonsense as fact.

That's really weird. Surely, if you believe in God, then the concept of Him ceasing to exist is impossible; and if you don't believe in God, you would find the discussion pointless and irrelevant.

Not quite the exact same thing, but I never quite got the whole Tim Farron thing, where non-believers with a motive were trying to force him into saying that, according to his faith, their beliefs were a 'sin' - a concept that meant nothing to them anyway.

I'm sure vegans would all (correctly) agree that my regular omnivorous diet means that I am 100% not compliant with their beliefs - but as they are their beliefs and not ones that I claim at all for myself, it makes no odds whatsoever to me. Where is the issue as long as we just live and let live?

Holy shit! I'd politely and professionally (as a professional person, scientist and sensible person) be discussing with the head, this is scaremongering, indoctrination and frankly worthy of the flat earth / creationist brigade ... fucking idiot teacher

@Marchforward As far as I'm aware, it's not a religion school. My daughter says there was children of different religions in her class.

@chilliplant634 I understand that I can explain it to her afterwards, but my problem is that I expect my daughter to be taught facts in school, and I've taught her to absorb what the teachers are teaching her.

When I suddenly switch my stance and tell her not to listen to the teacher on this occasion, I'm worried it could lead her to start ignoring her lessons.

Additionally, had I not noticed her being quiet on the trip home, the anxiety could have gotten to her even more. To find out she was upset for a week, worrying that time would stop displeased me.

I remember, when I was around 8, I snuck some whiskey from my dad's bottle (one of those tiny ones they used to give out on airplanes). It was vile, and I convinced myself that I had just drank poison. I remember going to bed thinking I wasn't going to wake up the next morning.

I'm worried that my daughter had been thinking that for a week, and suddenly had that thought reinforced that the world was about the explode.

Should I send an email to the school?

I mean, I will try to forget about it if that's the consensus. I have no idea if I really am just making a mountain out of a mole hill.

I'm afraid I'm a little bit blind when it comes to my daughter being sad :)

Speak to the school. Don’t accuse them of anything, just ask what they should be teaching and tell them what your child has said she was told.

It could be a ‘miscommunication’ or it could be a bit of an odd teacher. It does happen.

Hope your daughter is ok, I can imagine some kids finding that quite scary, especially if they really look up to their teacher.

I'd be extremely unhappy with my child being saddled with anxiety and having a belief system forced upon them during their education

But my child often repeats things wildly differently to how they were actually said too

I'd email the school and ask if they could confirm what was conveyed and consider if it was wildly inaccurate how young children might perceive things being said

Part of teaching young children is being able to communicate in ways they can comprehend

No, that's not okay and you definitely should speak to the school about it. All religions should be discussed but demonstrations like that to younger kids... completely out of order. The teacher should know better, shame on the school if that's how they want kids to learn about religion.

I live in a country where I would be having more than a few words with the teachers supervisor. I would first ask for clarification to make sure the story is reported accurately. If it is, with Something that egregious, I would expect the teacher to be removed from the classroom.

since you are likely in a country where you don’t have the right to a secular education, which is absolutely bizarre , I would at least be trying to get your dd moved to a different classroom.

for your child, you need to tell her that her teacher is wrong. It is ok for a child to realize that a teacher is a flawed human being just like all adults and will not always be correct. Everyone makes mistakes, including teachers and her teacher has made a very large mistake.

You don’t understand what is wrong with a teacher telling a young child that if a (potentially) make believe character stopped existing the entire world would implode?

I'm sure vegans would all (correctly) agree.......we just live and let live?

If previous threads on that subject are anything to go by, you are very wrong.

Or... we could not terrorise young children with the idea the world might end and we'll freeze or disappear

I've been indoctrinated as a kid... I despite not believing anymore still suffer with nightmares about a literal hell and relatives who've passed burning in it (bc they didn't believe)

Its extremely traumatic for children

If previous threads on that subject are anything to go by, you are very wrong.

Which bit is wrong: the first statement that vegans believe that eating meat wouldn't be compatible with their beliefs or my conditional logical stance at the end?!

But kids are also being taught that there are 72 genders and that they can alter their biological sex. There will always be messaging that you don't agree with, whether it is from a teacher or wider society. I don't think it's realistic to think you can block everything out. The child should respect their teachers but I personally do not think you should encourage them to think that teachers are the authority on everything or that they are always right.

Thank you, everyone, for your replies. I appreciate hearing the opinions from both sides here.

The Headteacher often stands at the gate at home time, saying goodbye to everyone, so I think I may take the opportunity to briefly and politely let her know about the situation. I didn't want to seem like one of those dads that would complain about little things.

Honestly, this has been eating at me for a while now.

Again, thank you all for your help!

Or... we could not terrorise young children with the idea the world might end and we'll freeze or disappear

To be fair, that's the message that some people in positions of authority give children when talking about climate change: not encouraging them positively to act responsibly and live eco-friendly in order to protect the planet, but giving them scary pinpointed black-and-white horror messages that cannot but leave them feeling frightened and powerless.

To be honest I'm highly skeptical. I'm not sure I believe the teacher really said that or meant that. It could be that the child has also misheard or misinterpreted what the teacher has said.

My 6 year old son came home one day thinking his friend had broken his back and was going to die, after his teacher went through safety instructions for kids on the playground after his friend was hurt. She didn't say anything of the sort.

There is a difference between “messages you don’t agree with” and telling them things likely to traumatise them, especially if the lesson seems specifically designed to incite terror onto children, rather than just being incidental (for example, this isn’t the same as my 7yo coming home irrationally scared of the northern lights)

@WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll and I would argue the same there. What does it serve to terrorise young children who can't really do much about things anyway

There's a time for these things, and a way to do it age appropriately

You didn’t say that the kid may not be telling the truth though, you said that you don’t understand the problem and that different viewpoints are okay.

Don't change the goalposts.

That’s probably because it’s live and let live....except for the animals that die.

But that’s another thread. 😅

This.

I won’t allow my child to take part in Religious Instruction at school because I am aware that some people feel very strongly that they must convert people. I don’t want my dc indoctrinated.

Do you have this option to opt out of Religious Instruction? Or is this teacher including her religious beliefs in the regular classroom lessons?

I remember at Religious Instruction at school being told that if we weren’t baptised we would end up in hell. The teacher asked us to put up our hand if we had been baptised. Then he said to those children with their hands up that they would go to heaven. The rest of us should talk to our parents about getting baptised because if we weren’t we’d end up in hell.

I remembered being scared and anxious about it because my parents wouldn’t take me to get baptised.