Is this how people socialise now?

[decobra]

Scenario 1
Neighbour: Are you around this afternoon? Our little one would love a play with your little ones.

Us: Sure, we're free after 2pm see you later

Neighbour: Never texts or show up but we see them literally walking past our house off to the local park

Scenario 2
Me: A bit short notice but do you fancy a play date this afternoon

Neighbour: Would love to, can I come back to you later?

Me: Yes, sure

Whole day passes and they never come back to us.
*
Scenario 3*
Me: in the last few years organises birthday drinks, Christmas drinks, walks, half term days out, playdates, adult only dinners, takeaways etc. for a small group of mum friends.

Group of Mum "Friends": organise literally nothing (with me anyway),

I feel like some people are atrocious are at socialising and can leave me feeling a bit like shit.

Luckily DH and both have good friends from school, uni and work, and we get on really well with a couple of families in on our street etc. etc.

But I just don't get some people and how they treat others?! I just don't "get" that way of socialising/opting out if socialising.

Why not send a polite text in the first two scenarios. And in the third scenario is suggesting something even basic like a walk or coffee so hard?

Anyway I've ditched the mum "friends" recently and today I've decided to give up on our immediate neighbours as they're just a bit shit.

But it did make me wonder... is this just how some people are? As in they don't think they're coming across a bit rude? AIBU?

But I just don't get some people and how they treat others?! I just don't "get" that way of socialising/opting out if socialising.

Neither do I. I don't bother with people who do this.

I think scenario 1 is rude, especiallyas they instigated it. Its quite likely that you've told your child X is coming over to play after lunch...and he's not 😕
Scenario 2 - on the fence a bit here. You've as good as said if you're free this afternoon pop round. Gheyve said, yeah could do, not sure what we're doing yet. Yes, ghey could have got back to you but I wouldn't be too fussed about this.
Scenario 3. No problem with this at all. In fact I would be pissed off if someone (you) started dropping hints that maybe I should organise something. Now from your point of view you feel it's unfair that others benefit when you do all the hard work and you want someone else to return the favour. My view is that if I 'liked you' or 'cared enough' it would happen spontaneously.....a bit like a guy offering to buy you a drink but then sulking because you didn't kiss him. I can guarantee (well 99%) that if the 'rule' was you all took a turn most would opt out. Not because they're mean and selfish, but the responsibility to pleasure ratio is too high.