To ask for a handhold/encouragement to hand in my notice at work this week

[courageto]

I've been there a year and a half, it's my second 'proper'/'career' job since university and I've been unhappy there since my first week, but pressed through thinking I need to just get on with it/it will get better/this is what the adult working world is like.

My mental health has been really low because of work, I wake up with a constant sense of dread and it's been affecting my health too. Last year I got signed off sick because of poor mental health, I returned and had a lot of support put in by my manager, HR and occupational health. However, my mental health has never really recovered and I still struggle a lot with work-related stress and anxiety. I have bad days at work multiple times a week, and my confidence is constantly being knocked.

I've started applying to jobs and had interviews lined up for every position I've applied to so far (which I cancelled as I couldn't attend due to important meetings at work I couldn't miss), so I hope that that is a sign that I'll be ok at getting another job? I have a 6 week notice period, and have enough savings to cover my bills for the next year. I also have support from family, who are encouraging me to leave.

AIBU to hand in my notice this week? My manager works remotely, so would I ask for a call with them and then say it over Zoom?

Our place would need it in writing, so email, even if you discuss it face to face with a manager anyway.

But YANBU. If the place is making you miserable and damaging your MH then leaving would be best

I have handed my notice in twice since wfh and both times have called/video called my manager to explain and then emailed across a letter of my formal notice of resignation.

Good luck! Taking the leap is scary but from the sounds of it is for the best. I’m in a similar position and also just need a little push!

I'd leave and if I had to, I'd temp if no job in that 6 weeks.
Good luck

My contract says I need to speak to my manager in my person to tell them, but if we are WFH most days I'm sure a call is fine. Then to follow it up in writing only after it's been discussed.

I'm dreading it as I know my manager will be trying to convince me to stay and probably frustrated as they have put in a lot of support to help me only for me to leave anyway

How does temping work? Is it easy to get a temping job?

Decide when you’re going to do it - will it be tomorrow? If so, it’ll all be over by the time you finish work. And however it goes, it won’t be the worst day you’ve ever worked there, will it?

what I try to do if I’m nervous of how a person will react, is to imagine to myself what they might say, and practise what you’ll say back. Have some stock phrases to use if it makes you feel better - ‘I appreciate it might be a shock, but my mind is made up’, ‘I’m prioritising my mental health and I’m sure nobody would begrudge me that’, etc etc. Things they can’t really come back from.

Good luck though! I remember handing my notice in a few years back for a role I’d been in for a while, and it’s nerve racking, I know. But that’s not a reason not to do it.

You'll be fine. Get it done first thing.
I left my toxic job recently and I can't describe how good it feels to get rid of that sick dread feeling. Lying awake worrying, crying in the shower, having to take a deep breathe and make myself turn my computer on. It's finally over.

If they know that you have had problems with work related stress and MH, maybe they won't be too surprised - they may be able to be flexible with time for interviews during your notice period.

With temp work, it depends on your field, but typically you'd sign up with an agency who will find you short term work. In some respects, it helps if your fairly robust - lots of new people, new environment, expected to hit the ground running - but equally employers will often recruit someone with more experience/seniority than the task really requires.

I think I want to do it tomorrow. Do I message my boss and ask if they are free for a quick call? They are very busy with a full schedule so I'm worried they will just ask me what I want over a Teams chat.

if they do, tell them you need to hand in your notice. Sure they’ll call you then, but if not it means you don’t have to feel awkward on the phone!

consider whether it might be worth making out you’ve got another job. If you don’t, they might think they’ll talk you into staying.

Have you done it yet?