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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to not be cooking dinner right now?

5 replies

PhDlifeNeedsaNewLife · 10/02/2008 19:58

I am fuming because - although he HAS helped with the housework and childcare this weekend - he has NOT cooperated with me IYKWIM. I keep asking for help/input into planning/organising stuff - in the longterm we really need to discuss/balance childcare/housework/his work/his study and either of us ever getting any 'quality' time - in the short term today I just wanted some input on meal planning/prep.

But apart from one suggestion (for a meal we don't have any ingredients for), most of the things I've said/asked him today have been met with silence. I know he doesn't mean anything by it - other than that he is preoccupied thinking about HIS stuff (his work, his study, his new fun hobby, his plans for going out on tuesday nights) to help me think about OUR stuff - but that is kind of the point, and it is getting right up my nose!

I know we need to talk calmly and rationally but so far he just ain't hearing my calm rational attempts to start this discussion. Is a strike a reasonable way of getting his attention? Should I at least go in there and TELL him I'm not cooking? Or should I just go cook, and think of some other way round this? (If it's the last, fgs give me some suggestions - I'm stuck!)

OP posts:
nametaken · 10/02/2008 20:28

Order yourself a take away - that should really annoy him.

PhDlifeNeedsaNewLife · 10/02/2008 20:47

am I really coming across as that petty, then?

OP posts:
pippylongstockings · 10/02/2008 20:59

If it was me i would stomp around a bit! Until he asks me what wrong...

DaphneHarvey · 10/02/2008 21:07

Trouble is you both need to eat. If going on strike, I'd just stop doing his washing (assume you do it?) and wait til he notices. Then sweetly say, I've cooked for you/for us for the last week, and decided what we're eating, but I'm not prepared to do everything for you.

Twill really hit home when he has no clean clothes to put on and you can do this strike quietly in the background while he's still taking you for granted and it will then really hit home IYKWIM .

PhDlifeNeedsaNewLife · 10/02/2008 21:08

if I get stompy he just gets more withdrawn. I kind of have been PO'd all afternoon and he is staying well out of my hair, not so much hoping I'll get over it (though that's part of it) but being too preoccupied.

OP posts:
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