This thread is depressing 
I'm still fighting for a referral. DS was 4.5 and about to start school when I first realised he might have ASD and/or ADHD. Now, 1.5 years later, he's in Y1, about to turn 6, and I am still struggling to get the SENDCO to take me seriously. Referrals have to be through school in my area. DS masks in school. I am paying for private OT (assessment and ongoing sessions) and the OT is supposed to be going into school to meet the SENDCO and observe DS together, I have been waiting for this for a while but hopefully when it happens it will be another small step in the right direction. SENDCO needs to agree to put DS on the SEND register because we will need all the associated paperwork for a referral.
According to the information I can find, waiting times after referral will depend what year he's in by then:
^Priority one:
These are pre-school children, years 5/6, those at risk of exclusion and safeguarding / looked after children.
The target wait to first assessment is 18 weeks.^
^Priority two:
All other children who fall outside of the priority one remit.
The longest wait is approx. 68 weeks, but this may change depending on demand and capacity.^
So if we can get a referral in Y2 (I'm not holding my breath) the current wait is about 16 months.