To ask what to buy as a wedding present for a couple who have been together 15 years and have two kids?

[Thepeopleversuswork]

Very settled, don't want for a great deal in material terms, own their home and loads of nice stuff in it so no obvious need for typical wedding presents and I don't think they would want that.

Want something which is significant for both of them and something which is appropriate for a wedding but they aren't making a fuss of the wedding; it's a small civil service. I don't think they'd like anything obviously commemorative or "weddingy" if that makes sense ie crockery or jewellery. They are big readers, outdoorsy. Neither particularly materialistic. Two kids approaching teen years.

National trust membership or RHS membership for the family. They will get lots of super family days out and memories x

I will be in this position and want nothing. I would just be thrilled to see everyone and have them celebrate with me. No gifts necessary, genuinely

Because some people don't like to. It's not that far a stretch to imagine that. You're very irritated by others who may not think like you.

Also, in some cultures giving money is rather gauche. (I know my mam/ aunts would never have done this. Even my sister who's a bit older than me wouldn't either. Things have changed somewhat, but it's still there).

I would give vouchers rather than money, personally.

Sounds similar to my ex, bless her lest she's doing well, and has the kids ect.
Not sure what id advise getting I guess something like a picture to celebrate their years of service ?

My nephew is getting married soon and has specified no gifts, just donations to their favourite charity , which we will do .
I have also made for him a compilation of our family video camera footage that feature him as a youngster and his grand parents who died 25 years ago .

Gift should be about recipient not gifter really.

Honestly, imagine if everyone.gives them god forsaken silver frames. Waste.
Give money or what the couple needs and that's it. The money can go towards bigger purchase such as nice bedding, kitchen aplliance, holidays.
It should be about the recipient and what suots them the best.

Though vouchers are kind of ok ifore people give same vouchers. Franky, getting 20 quid voucher for John Lewis is rather... Not practical

National Trust annual pass or vouchers

Just give cash or a voucher . Then they can get whatever they want or need .

Generally speaking, a cohabiting couple of a decade and a half who have nearly teenage kids are less likely to be caught up in traditional ideas like not giving cash as a gift.

If I was going to a full wedding it wouldn't be £20. The standard here is you pay the equivalent of your meal. So a couple = minimum £100. So the vouchers wouldn't be useless.

Perhaps you're right. But it depends how you're brought up, and I've been brought up not to give cash (unless it's very close family- children/ siblings/ nieces/ nephews).

If they've said they don't want anything then don't get them anything 🤷🏻‍♀️

How odd.

Then they don't want stuff. As said just give cash or a voucher for something that you know they would like.

Just been to a wedding today they already have there life and said any gifts of money would be appreciated towards a honeymoon which I thought was great rather than buying something they don't want

I was speaking from the recipients point of view, not the sender. I’d be surprised if the recipient in this situation would find it odd given that they have clearly shunned tradition thus far.

Depending on budget:
National Trust membership
Hotel vouchers
Restaurant vouchers
Starbucks gift card
Unlimited cinema membership for a year
Personalised art?

As I said, you're probably right.

How rude.

Just offering my perspective as someone in a similar situation (long term cohabitating couple with kids)- I respect others may disagree, but gifts should surely be about the recipient rather than the sender.

Id accept all gifts graciously, but I really wouldn’t expect anything (and I’m not just saying that to be nice - we do tend to be quite minimal/mindful in terms of “stuff”) but my “favourite” gifts would be those which are consumable or cash/vouchers.

I do think that a long term cohabiting couple - or, to a lesser extent, any cohabiting couple - are less likely to appreciate towels or glasses, and more likely to appreciate cash which they can use towards something tangible like a honeymoon, a house deposit/renovation etc.

I do think that a long term cohabiting couple - or, to a lesser extent, any cohabiting couple - are less likely to appreciate towels or glasses, and more likely to appreciate cash which they can use towards something tangible like a honeymoon, a house deposit/renovation etc.

Yeah I'm pretty sure they don't want towels or stuff like that from the home. They really don't need anything like this.

An inflatable kayak

I'd get a voucher for something and possibly something memorable which they could do as a family - llama trekking is a good one, indoor skydiving, zip lining etc.

Or if you don't want to spend x 4, maybe an afternoon tea for two somewhere nice but not too far away.

I personally wouldn't want more household stuff for my already overcrowded house and anyway, I'm quite particular in my tastes. Buying a one off piece of art etc only works if you know the recipient very well.

What about a three or six month flowers-by-post or chocolate brownie letterbox subscription?

We had a no present wedding too but told close friends to bring us something in a bottle. We got the usual champagne and wine etc but also some fantastic olive oil, gorgeous bath stuff, balsamic vinegar etc. And beautiful wine glasses

If they love their garden what about a statement potted tree. An olive maybe in a lovely terracotta pot.