AIBU to spit my dummy out?

[totallybonafido]

I know I am, and I'm being ridiculous, but I'm having a proper strop!!

We were told about our bonus outcome and at work this week. We have a bonus scheme where a set % of any grade can be awarded a bonus uplift. I made an agreement with a colleague to tell each other if we got the uplift - he did and I didn't.

For the last couple of years I have worked on a very high profile project and had great feedback for it. I have presented about it numerous times on big conference calls. My colleague was involved in the project as well but I was the lead.

My colleague has also been involved in other activities, where I'm sure he did a great job, and probably he deserved the uplift, but I really feel like I did too. It's a real kick in the teeth to not get it, as my boss has been telling me for years that I'm the person she relies on, and I'm considered the go to person when anyone needs help.

I'm feeling really down about it, and like I immediately want to stop putting in so much effort and do the bare minimum. The bonus that I got, someone who was considered just satisfactory would have got the same. Considering calling in sick next week and leaving them in the lurch as we're in a really busy period, and if my colleague is so bloody great, he can deal with it. I think I will start looking for other jobs, maybe I've made myself too useful in my current position.

Again, yes, I know that IABU but I've had a big drink and feeling very unappreciated and sorry for myself.

Your face quite literally doesn't fit. I'd hang on for the ahare option then move.

Based on how you described the set up it sounds like a workplace I am aware of. I would recommend reaching out for advice from your union rep, explain exactly as you have here and that you were told there was no area to improve which would lead to better outcome and that it was personal preference that led to the decision. They may be able to help you properly appeal it.

It's so annoying, because I've worked there nearly 10 years and never had an issue with anyone else, people come to me all the time to ask me for help and I get on well with everyone else. It's just this 1 woman and I hate to let her push me out. No union unfortunately.

This is so unfair. Start looking for a new job and wait til you get your shares if they are a decent amount. It may take that long anyway. Don’t take it personally your line manager will give you a fantastic reference seems like BB and VP don’t like the look if you and are being snide in their treatment.

Similar happened to me. I was regularly told how much they value my experience, top-performing worker, really represent the brand brilliantly.

We have about 15 different sites around the country (think similar to a kids activity centre), and they asked us to enter a company-wide competition on our fb page, showing a day of "best practice". I went all-out. Documented an amazing day, great links to child development and showing every single little scrap of evidence of best practice. So the entry for my site was A*. And when I saw the other entries, knew that mine was the best by a country mile.

A member of head office chose the winner... He chose the site nearest his house, that he has a lot of day to day involvement with, where he's friends with all the workers. Their entry was 50% as good as mine.

I still work for this company, but now I just do my job and leave it. I continue to mentor and support the young staff on MY site, but I don't do ANYTHING that could be seen as sharing my expertise with the wider organisation. If they value my experience and skills so little, then fuck em. I'd advise you take the same attitude OP!

If you don’t want to say anything, invest in a couple of nice interview ready for Sept, but start enjoying them now at work. Dump your 2 least faves. Not saying they’ll rethink, but there was a certain suit that paid for itself many times over. ( you know what us girls are like, can’t help ourselves wearing the new shiny things … so obvious what we would be buying that for 😉)

Obviously the guy who did get the bonus is good at smiling at the right people. That doesn't mean he particularly deserves it though, does it. You're right to decide to leave.

I feel for you OP. I had a disagreement this week with new manager who was previously a peer. We got on fabulously. Agreed on lots of things. Yesterday, my last day before a week's holiday I got a massive dressing down about my conduct. How he is aware of 3 complaints about me (no detail though) and has heard other things. Examples listed are easily defended. But his boss has always hated me so now the planets have aligned for them and I'm being monitored. But it's the culture that's been built. Say nothing and don't act without permission. Time for me to go so will have to bite my tongue and try to get out. I'm devastated though. My holiday ruined.

You may as well update your CV and start looking now then? You'll feel better if you can see an exit. You've done a good ten years so I'm sure you'll find another company who will place more value on you.

Six months is a fabulous length of time to look for a new job. I agree with @Jebatronic about the new work outfits. Just a little bit of a polish, plus walking back the efforts at work, and zhuzhing up your CV, and you will feel better about taking control. They can watch their company circle the drain as you leave for better things.

I’d be considering documenting the conversation, including your prior performance, the achievements, positive feedback, your awareness of other employees receiving the bonus. Then that no areas for improvement were noted but to confirm her comments that ’you don’t look happy’ and she feels you’re ‘unapproachable.’ I would document it unemotionally and note it’s to confirm the details of your discussion. I would copy HR on the email and your current manager.

I wonder whether you might find that an agreement can magically be reached regarding a settlement to leave early.