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AIBU?

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Original poster

Would you report this? Potential benefit fraud

389 replies

Overthebow · 03/03/2023 09:35

I’m struggling with this one, on one hand I think just leave it as everyone is struggling to survive, on the other it just doesn’t sit right with me. And I’d it even benefit fraud? I don’t have much experience with benefits so not sure. I need your thoughts! here’s the situation.

A couple had a baby a few years ago. Almost straight afterwards they split up.she got a housing association property and universal credit, she doesn’t work. He lives at his mums, has a decently paid job and doesn’t claim UC. But ever since they’ve still appeared to kind of be together. He sleeps over a few times a week, they go on days out and holidays together and she talks about them as ‘we’ and ‘us’. She’s also talked about buying a house together in the future as he is able to save a decent amount.

OP posts:
Theunamedcat · 03/03/2023 09:48

If he is saving for a house he won't be giving her all his money will he

fluffylampbear · 03/03/2023 09:49

not benefit fraud and not your business frankly. He could be staying over to help with the child. Provided it's not his main address then there's no issue.

Also your judgement is totally wrong. It's tough being a parent to a young kid, even more difficult when you're a single parent. Give this person a break.

philautia · 03/03/2023 09:49

@Overthebow "they" are not getting "benefit money", she is getting Universal Credit.

It sounds like you want her to struggle!

Honestly, keep your beak out.

GoChasingWaterfalls · 03/03/2023 09:51

Does it matter, really? The amount they are claiming is a pittance compared to the billions lost by this government's failure to tackle tax avoidance by the wealthy, or the amount they wasted on dodgy PPE contracts they gave to their mates.

If you're so concerned about the misuse of public funds, why not use your energy lobbying your MP about these issues instead?

Daffodilsandbeer · 03/03/2023 09:52

Ok what’s the real deal here op. Why you itching to cause them some pain and so focused on them ?

and no it’s not benefit fraud.

Beaverbridge · 03/03/2023 09:52

Not benefit fraud. Why do you care?. Worse going on in the world just now.

Skyeheather · 03/03/2023 09:52

It's not fraud because he's not living there.

Maybe she doesn't want him living with her, to protect her house so it's just hers incase they break up again in the future.

I didn't think that child maintenance is taken into account for UC? So he can give her as much money as he likes to support his child?

WhatInFreshHell · 03/03/2023 09:54

Keep your snout out Smile

MrsSkylerWhite · 03/03/2023 09:55

Yes it is likely fraud. I have a relative, who I don’t see for many reasons, who is very deliberately in this situation. They both live in separate social housing (he has disabilities and is priority for housing and a notability car) claim various benefits as single people and spend several nights together with their children each week. They are very much a couple.

TheFormidableMrsC · 03/03/2023 09:55

It's not fraud and quite frankly their personal situation is none of your business. Mind your own.

Chippy1234 · 03/03/2023 09:56

Its playing the system and its rife. But people on MN's seem to think its OK because they arent paying for it (you are indirectly).

Lets all wish them happiness (not!)

Hevviie · 03/03/2023 09:56

You want to report a family with a newborn baby on an inkling they might be getting more help than they 'deserve'? You don't think you could just leave it alone and get on with your life? Do you have some kind of vendetta towards these people?

Idkrealorfake · 03/03/2023 09:56

MrsSkylerWhite · 03/03/2023 09:55

Yes it is likely fraud. I have a relative, who I don’t see for many reasons, who is very deliberately in this situation. They both live in separate social housing (he has disabilities and is priority for housing and a notability car) claim various benefits as single people and spend several nights together with their children each week. They are very much a couple.

That's not fraud either.

TheFormidableMrsC · 03/03/2023 09:57

MrsSkylerWhite · 03/03/2023 09:55

Yes it is likely fraud. I have a relative, who I don’t see for many reasons, who is very deliberately in this situation. They both live in separate social housing (he has disabilities and is priority for housing and a notability car) claim various benefits as single people and spend several nights together with their children each week. They are very much a couple.

Couples are not required to live together. Are you saying that single parents should not have a relationship? I wouldn't actually want to live with somebody again so the situation you describe seems perfectly reasonable.

Flamingogirl08 · 03/03/2023 09:57

Who pays this much attention to other people's lives? Just mind your own business

Flamingogirl08 · 03/03/2023 09:58

MrsSkylerWhite · 03/03/2023 09:55

Yes it is likely fraud. I have a relative, who I don’t see for many reasons, who is very deliberately in this situation. They both live in separate social housing (he has disabilities and is priority for housing and a notability car) claim various benefits as single people and spend several nights together with their children each week. They are very much a couple.

Well that's not fraud at all is it 🙄

lazycats · 03/03/2023 09:58

Doesn't sound too bad. If the a baby stands to lose money I wouldn't report.

MrsPelligrinoPetrichor · 03/03/2023 09:59

idontbutido · 03/03/2023 09:38

That's not benefit fraud though. You can have a boyfriend who sleeps there a few times a week and you go on holiday together and still have a single UC claim.

This!!

It needs filing under 'none of your damn business!'

LetThemEatTurnips · 03/03/2023 10:01

Chippy1234 · 03/03/2023 09:56

Its playing the system and its rife. But people on MN's seem to think its OK because they arent paying for it (you are indirectly).

Lets all wish them happiness (not!)

My taxes are paying for it, obviously.

But my view is:
a) the benefits system is extremely tough in the UK anyway, with far higher resources going into catching those rule breakers than into ensuring tax evaders are caught despite the vast amount of unpaid tax
b) what the OP describes is within the rules
c) I am a happy person with a good life so tend to think about that rather than trying to drag others down

Idkrealorfake · 03/03/2023 10:01

People like the OP make me lose hope in this country.

Fingers crossed you're just goading and not an actual mother looking to put another new mother through a government investigation and potentially court for no reason.

That would be extremely cruel.

35965a · 03/03/2023 10:01

This is within the ‘rules’ so keep out of it.

JaffaCake70 · 03/03/2023 10:02

They aren't doing anything wrong. She's allowed to have him stay over a few nights.

How will you benefit personally from reporting them? Will it make you feel good about yourself?

Times are hard, what does it matter to you if she receives UC and also a few extra pounds from her child's Father? Would you prefer it if you could see that she was struggling financially?

I think it would be very spiteful of you to report them. Mind your own business instead of interfering in other people's!

Moonicorn · 03/03/2023 10:03

memyselfi · 03/03/2023 09:38

What the hell is it to do with you ?
Just mind your own business.
Do people really live like this ?
Monitoring friends or neighbours for some transgression?
You've no clue what their lives are like , wish them happiness.

I always think posts like this are by people on the fiddle themselves.

Report her, if there’s nothing amiss then she won’t be in any trouble 🤷🏼‍♀️

But let’s not pretend benefit fraud is a ‘victimless’ crime or ‘not really stealing’.

Chickychoccyegg · 03/03/2023 10:03

Completely baffling that some posters think it's fraud if a person claiming benefits enters a relationship and has their partner to stay the night sometimes.
As long as the partner doesn't live there it's not fraud, there's nothing more to it, you can be in a relationship with someone while claiming UC and living in social housing, its not difficult to understand.
Op you have absolutely no grounds for even considering reporting this couple, are you jealous?

DramaLlama20 · 03/03/2023 10:03

WFHbore2023 · 03/03/2023 09:42

Not fraud - but defo playing the system

This
They know what they're doing, we all know what they're doing but if you report then nothing will come of it
Wish I could be that morally bankrupt to behave like that but hey at least I've got my pride.