Too early to go on a date?

[Singlelady23]

I recently separated from my husband, like 3 weeks recent. I’ve been trying to do it since October but only just had the nerve to. We have been living apart for a year as he works away, only spent a few weeks together over that time. Because of this I already feel like I’ve ‘moved on’.

Someone has asked me on a date, and I really like him. AIBU to go?

Plenty will disagree with me, but I feel that it's too soon. I wouldn't have processed any of my emotional baggage that early on. And would run a mile from any guy so soon out of a relationship. It screams not being able to handle being on your own, and I don't find that attractive.
However, only you know what feels right for YOU. I'm only saying how it was for me.
I hope everything works out ok.

Bump

Everyone feels differently about when the right time is, personally I waited 2 years after my marriage breakdown as I needed time to be on my own and process everything. My marriage had been over for years before I finally left, but I still needed that time before I started dating again.

I met my partner whilst still married but mid divorce separated about 9 months. Prior to that I internet dated casually but wouldn't have been ready for proper dating.

I went on a date about 3 months after separating from my Husband and it was good, although it still felt strange in some ways. I really think 3 weeks would be far too soon for the vast majority of people/circumstances. If the person is special/it’s meant to be, they should be prepared to give you a bit more time. And I think you should hold your horses a bit and just breathe for a month or two before starting something new.

You should trust your own instincts. It sounds like you mentally exited your relationship awhile ago.

I think the only way you'll know for sure is to try. There's no harm in going on a date. I would be cautious though of easily falling into another full on relationship too soon.

Depending on circumstances and what's happened in your previous relationship, only you will know if you've moved on completely and just what too soon is.

No one needs to know you're dipping your toe in, if you're worried about judgement. Life's too short to pass up on opportunities. Let us know how it goes. Good luck and congratulations on your new life. X

Thank you ladies. New year, new me. Always lived a boring life, I feel like I deserve some excitement, I’m only 38!

I can relate!
Good luck

I would say too soon.
Spend sometime getting comfortable with being you - even though you seem to have checked out of your last relationship a while ago, it is only very recent that it has all been finalised.
I am / have been in a similar situation and just enjoying that time getting to know exactly what I like and doing everything on my own terms has been an eye opener.
I know my mum (quite crassly I hasten to add) always used to say "to get over one you need to get under another one" - it's really not true. Don't under estimate the power of learning and knowing your true self before opening that door to let someone else into your space, mind or emotions.

Go on the date and see how you feel about it. Only you can say if you're ready or not. There's no rules on this everyone's situation is different. Just don't fall to fast and go with an open mind, slowly slowly.

I dated a guy for 3 years, we broke up and didn't date anyone again (seriously) until I met my my DH 4 years later. I enjoyed that bit of time to myself and enjoying life without being committed to a person etc.

And dating doesn't necessarily mean "relationship". Dating can be quite casual, no strings attached.

I think it's a personal choice kinda thing. Like others have said, only you will know when you're ready.

Well ladies, I went on the date. It was excellent 😁

Fantastic news! Congratulations and thanks for the update. Is there likely to be a second?