Crying at work. Send help.

[Dunkindonuts8]

Ok, so I know I am being unreasonable to cry at work, but how can I stop?! I want to project a professional appearance but I am going through some difficult circumstances at the moment and, if I talk about them, I inevitably cry. I am sick of myself 🙈 It is really frustrating. I want to make my point and what I have to say is important, but the whole message is lost or detracted from because I can't stop myself from becoming upset.

Please please PLEASE does anyone have any tips to stop me from being a 'cryer'.

Focus on the work and really focus on it and your colleagues. Business as usual will ground you and it'll take your mind off whatever it is really.

I agree with an pp. Or the personal stuff in a box and close the lid tightly. Don't talk about it. If someone else brings it up just say, I'd rather not talk about it and move swiftly on.

Deep breaths in through the nose and out through the mouth. Just close your eyes and concentrate on the breath. Then, when you can, a brisk walk round the block in the fresh air.

Don't talk about them. As unfair as it may seem being a "crier" damages your credibility.

Can you not talk about them at work?

Fake it. Pretend in your head that you are a totally together hard ass boss bitch.

Don't talk about them. Tell colleagues (in an email if it helps) that you don't want to speak about your personal life, then once you get into work, it's heads down and problems left at the door until it's time to leave. Use headphones as a distraction if necessary.

Sertraline. Stopped me being overly emotional, crying or angry. Such a relief to feel in control of emotions.

Pretend you are an actor acting the role of work mode you

Why are you telling people at work about your personal stuff OP? Is that normal for you?

Someone once gave me advice that if you tip your head right back when you're tearful, it stops you from crying. It works. You physically can't cry with your head tipped back.

I'm a cryer. Always have been, can't help it, just the way I'm made. I felt AWFUL about it and so unprofessional and embarrassed until I got be a manager for a whole team. And guess what? Of the staff I have currently in my team who have been there over 1 year, I have seen all of them either crying or trying very hard not to cry. It's just normal unfortunately, shit things happen and sometimes having a cry is weirdly what you need to get the emotion out and feel better. If you feel able to, I'd make sure you tell your manager that you're having some personal issues that have knocked you off your game (you don't need to be specific if you don't want to). You can do your best not to cry in front of people, but you know what? If you do, IT'S OKAY. Nothing to feel ashamed about. It's literally just water coming out of your face.

Compartmentalise at work, but make sure that out of work you have lots and lots of appropriate outlets and you really prioritise your wellbeing.

Try and keep a steady pace of work going, so regular pace of meetings not leaving too much time for your thoughts to drift. Plan your diary around when you typically feel more robust, have a plan for moving subjects away from personal topics.

Working from home also helps as you only have to do "face" for a short period.

Find the colleagues who get it, and lean on them if you can.

Do you need to be off work with stress until your personal life becomes less upsetting if that's likely to be something that will have an end? I'd say it looks better to be off than to be crying in work. You could maybe sit down with your line manager and explain what's going on and ask for flexible working, perhaps reduced hours or working from home etc? And I'd suggest getting another outlet for whatever is stressful eg counselling/running/walking outdoors/ baking literally whatever works for you so it's not as pent up and coming out in the workplace.

I'm a cryer. I really have no control over it. I wish I did. If I'm sad the tears come out.

The only thing that would work for me is to simply not talk about whatever triggers your crying at work and to also avoid thinking about it if you can. I can block out things pretty well when I need to. As long as I don't talk about the problem I can fill my gear with other stuff quite well for a period of time.

Obviously you can't block it for too long. You need an outlet even if it involves crying. The blocking would just be to get you through the work day.

Is the thing that’s making you cry work related?

My mum is very poorly and i basically just say to my colleagues i just prefer not to talk about it as it's upsetting..
One trick I've learned to stop crying is to put your tongue at the roof of your mouth.. it really works!!

Also sedatives of some kind... see your gp.

If you are unable to compartmentalise then you need to look at whether having some time off to deal with what you're going through is feasible. Thing is I tend to put on a game face at work and in any moment of weakness go to the bathroom / for a walk outside etc. If you find yourself tearing up when randomly standing at the photocopier then is it possible you need to talk to your manager and see what can be done, because despite your best efforts the tears might still come.

I’m sorry op. I hope you’re not working on the checkout at Tesco x

Try looking up at the ceiling, just pointing your eyes up, I do that to try and stop tears

As a fellow crier, I feel your pain. I find that once I have started, the harder it is to stop with the added embarrassment and frustration with myself for doing it.
A pp has said sertraline. It might have worked for her but not me. Other drugs are available though for depression if you are in that state.
It’s shit so massive hugs from me x

I had this and had to get medical help. I took diazepam at work to function. Otherwise I would cry non stop.

I take pregabalin now as I fucked my life up again and need help to function for a bit.

Glass of water. You can’t drink water and cry at the same time.

Depends where you work.
My office seems to be the designated "crying" room. I regularly get the tissues out - probably more than once a month. Even my boss of 2 months has had a bottom lip wobble.
So, either don't go close to trigger topics at work, or find a safe space to let it out.