MIL kissing baby?

[mommaoft]

I've told my MIL on various occasions that I don't want anyone kissing DS. Yesterday went to the extent of telling her "Dad and I don't kiss him either" we did up until DS has developed some sort of oral thrush twice now.

Of course a lot of things could be causing this, doesn't necessarily mean it's kissing him, could be the fact that he's crawling and tries putting everything in his mouth. Regardless, I've always said no one is to kiss his mouth, and she's never respected this, especially now that father and i aren't to do so either.

Yesterday when I told her off for doing so, she said i've got DS in a bad habit of kissing, he kissed her, which is complete trash, he doesn't know how to. He does not kiss.

I've tried teaching him to blow kisses, give me kisses on the cheek and do the same to him but he hadn't learnt it yet, so it's impossible he would've kissed her.

AIBU to tell her if she does it again there will be serious consequences and i'll consider less visits since she can't respect parental boundaries?

Kissing on the cheek or head is lovely but I don't like the idea of kissing babies on the mouth, but everyone to their own.

I don’t see any reason, no matter your family title, why you’d kiss someone else’s baby like that. My MIL tried to do this to DS when he was a newborn when she gets coldsores. DS is 3 now and we instil into family members that they must ask him for a cuddle or a kiss and if he says no, they don’t pursue it.

Just makes me uncomfortable and not to mention the germs they could be passing beyond what your little one might just pick up from being a normal baby and mouthing everything. I don’t think you’re being unreasonable

British people are so uptight! I'm very protective of my baby, but I allow family to kiss him! Smh!

Well fair enough if your MIL is disgusting with coldsores, but I don't think normal people are like this. I have never had a coldsore, neither had DH or any of our parents. If they did that would be a different story

On the mouth? You realise a large percentage of people who carry the herpes virus which causes coldsores are unaware they carry it?

Call me uptight then! No kissing on the mouth from anyone! Why would anyone expect a baby's parents want to kiss a baby on the mouth!

How old is your baby if hes crawling? I have such fond memories of big slobbery kisses from my babies. What a shame your baby isnt getting kisses from his own mum and dad.

Do not allow her unsupervised access. If she continues to do this while supervised no more visits. Do not ask her for childcare. If she's ignoring this she will ignore everything else.

I am British and agree with you. I have never known a baby become ill or die from being kissed but I'm sure a load of posters will be along soon to correct me with facts.

Yeah who doesn’t want a bit slobbery kiss from their baby. I’m slightly offended to be scooped up in this view of U.K. parents as uptight.

Are you seriously suggesting op goes no contact because her MIL shows affection to her grandson? Are you always this dramatic?

Don't get me wrong if my family was riddled with herpes then fair enough, but in general I'm happy for family to kiss my baby, if anything it's just natural?

No I'm suggesting the child is not left alone with her.

The parents have expressed their wishes for no kissing baby on the mouth. If she has such a blatant disregard for this then what else will she ignore. Car seats? Safe sleep advice? No hotdogs?

Cold sores can kill babies, google it. I wouldn’t like this either.

What a sad world when grandparents are admonished for kissing their grandchildren.

Babies have very good immune systems for the very reason that everything goes in their mouth at that age. A quick kiss on the face or lips from granny isn’t going to harm them. The benefit from the familial love and attention far out ways any risk.

Do you treat your own mother like this OP? This is very cruel advice. I would be devastated if when my sin was older I was treated like this by him and his wife.

I most certainly would if I'd asked my mum repeatedly not to do something I considered harmful to my child and she repeatedly did it anyway.

How old is your baby? Mine is 10 months and loves giving big sloppy kisses. Especially to MIL because she loves her Nanny. I have no problem with it. I caught her trying to lick her Dad's shoe yesterday so 🤷

I've never had one (I'm anal about sharing cups), are they infectious if it's not actually presented? I assumed you'd only catch it if you saw it

How do you avoid kissing your baby?? From about 1 THEY give you these big slobbery, open-mouthed kisses when you least expect it.

Whilst I agree with your comment regarding uprightness, you need to tone down the derogatory language. Riddled? Disgusting? Coldsores are common and normal, and not disgusting. The person with them isn't disgusting. They have a virus.

I’m on team Kiss The Baby as well. How do you expect babies to build immunity, if it’s never needed? Babies crawl on the floor and eat dirt. A kiss from grandma is socially necessary and physically needed, and not a risk. I read your post OP, and thought you were bonkers. Then I read some of the posts beneath. Why would someone need to kiss a baby, indeed! Actually when it comes to that, why talk to them, sing to them, cuddle them, play with them or any of it!

This. And which is it, you don't want her to kiss him at all or just not on the mouth?