How are we just raising marriage age to 18?

[Whattodonut]

Just that. Amazing its taken so long!

There are a hell of a lot of things you can't do until you are 18 now like not be in education or training. If the government wasn't bothered with a certain shitty thing I think they would align the law in England so you couldn't do anything until you were 18.

My DD is 16. She doesn't socialise much with boys because she goes to an all-girls school. She's not had a boyfriend yet. Her head is full of getting good results at School, playing video games, listening to music and hanging out with her mates. She doesn't have a job, yet. She is soooo far off the marrying type. I was the same at her age. I didn't have a boyfriend until I was 19. Until then it was all, school, university, books, music, friends, discovery of the Internet (late 90s/early 2000s), going out. Though I did have a weekend job.

My mum, however, left school at 15 and went to work. She married at 21. My aunt married at 18. This was the 1960s, and a different time for women. Much less opportunity for one, and there were still some rules about needing a male guarantor to get a credit card or mortgage. Getting pregnant before marrying was shameful. My cousin came along very quickly after my aunt & uncle got married! (They were married for five decades)

So a lot has changed in the past 60-70 years. Women have a lot more rights, safeguards and opportunities now. Still not saying it's perfect though. I hope the new law will stop some families marrying off their daughters before they've completed their formal education. The old, "We're going on holiday to see the aunts and Grandma" and coming back with a husband with a spousal visa.

I know some young women are more mature than others but society isn't really set up for marriage at 16 anymore.

In parts of the US sex with a child is statutory rape, but if the rapist can mange to get the girl to marry him the charge magically disappears.

Could raising of the marriage age actually make things worse for those who are shipped off abroad to marry older men? If they wouldn't be legally seen as married in the UK, could they end up "going to college" aka stuck in their spouses homes for 2 years before being allowed back to the UK by their parents?

I'd like there to be a law that makes it illegal to have a relationship with a teenager when you are more than 10 years older than them. Maybe even less of a gap for 16-year-olds. Stop those older pervs grooming teens.

My M got married with parental consent at 17 to my F who was nearly twice her age. They consented because she was pregnant and they thought it was for the best. It wasnt. Shame really that they couldn't have facilitated her to finish her education and stand on her own two feet.

@BadNomad I agree

People can be parents younger, enough of the ageism. Should we say we wish people started menopause earlier so they don't have kids so old (30s/40s)?

Personally I think it should be 21. Even 18 is too young(honestly I think 21 is too).

I actually know two woman who got married at 16.

First in in her 50s now, married her now ex husband who was 18 and just about to join the army, 3 kids very quickly but he rarely came home, no married quarters due to him somehow putting a stop to it, she was pregnant when they married and married for the housing. Separated about 10 years later.

Second married at 16 he was also 18, still together 18 years later and still like newly weds with two children.

I think we need to educate young people (and everyone else) better about what marriage is. Press the point that it is not a romantic commitment, but actually a financial one. And one that only lasts for the length of the marriage. Always have a way to support yourself should that contract end. Don't leave yourself vulnerable by believing you are protected for life.

16-year-olds are a bit young to understand the financial implications, but it might benefit a pregnant 16-year-old to get married because having a child so young will likely affect her ability to finish education, have a career, get a mortgage, and have savings. That's if the boyfriend isn't a feckless teenager who doesn't work and only plays the Xbox all day.

And make divorce easy and shame free. No one should stay in an unhappy marriage.

Lots of my aunties married at 17,18 and 19. Some still with their husbands some not. There was no living together before marriage in my family so that might of been a driver for marriage at a young age.

Same.
Actually the marriage age used to be 21, although you could get married before that but only with parental permission. My friend, in her seventies now, was 20 when she married and had to get her parents to agree.

My auntie married at 18 to a man who went on to beat the shit out of her, including throwing her down the stairs when she was pregnant. They're still together 50 years later. Divorce was never an option. It wouldn't even have occurred to them. In those days when you married, you married for life.

A long marriage doesn't mean a good marriage.

I needed parental consent before the banns were called, although the wedding was after I turned 21. We got married because our parents objected to us "living in sin!" Different times....

Me too. The vulnurable need to be protected. I have a 16 year old Dd. The thought of any man preying on her makes me feel ill. Although to be fair, her and her friends aren’t interested at the moment.

If it's so important to them they can use contraception or practice abstinence.

I would say that protecting children from being exploited is more important. It's usually a much older man involved.

I agree, they should. But accidents happen, even to the most cautious. To remove their right to be married in such circumstances is unfair. If the law thinks you're old enough to have children, they should be old enough to have the right to have paperwork legitimising that.

16 does seem young to marry but I'm unsure how specific rights/responsibilities are assessed.
So at 16 you can atm marry, have sex, medically 'change gender' pay full fair on the bus....but you cant vote, buy cigarettes or Red Bull or a alcohol or a pen knife, can't opt out of training/education, watch porn, x rated films, work on a building site or stay overnight in a travelodge even though your parents have paid and are in the next room!

@MarshaMelrose I'd agree with that.

Yes the majority of society wouldn't bother if a teen was pregnant (accidents happen) but for some it would be a horrendous scandal esp with a religious background.

It all does add up to having one age for everything, consent, marriage, voting and toasting the bridesmaids and taking your kid swimming.

But I cannot see them raising the age of consent for a long time.

In England?

My auntie married at 18 to a man who went on to beat the shit out of her, including throwing her down the stairs when she was pregnant. They're still together 50 years later. Divorce was never an option. It wouldn't even have occurred to them. In those days when you married, you married for life

Maybe in your family, but I was married over 50 years ago and divorced four years later just because we wanted to.

We weren't living in Victorian times, 50 years ago was 1973

The age of majority in England & Wales was lowered from 21 to 18 in 1969 (came in to force 1st Jan 1970)

In many families. Especially here in Ireland. But you missed the point of my post which was anecdotes like "my auntie married at 18 and is still married 50 years later" don't prove anything.