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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Health visitor visit

13 replies

WonderWoop · 27/02/2023 11:10

AIBU to think health visitor could give a reasonable window to visit in that isn't 'sometime this morning'?

Have two week old and three year old and stuck inside this morning waiting from 9-1 for HV visit. 11 now and toddler starting to climb the walls. Not entirely confident HV will even arrive by one.
Don't see any real benefit in their visit either based on DC1 interactions.
Is it just me?!

OP posts:
yevrah1102 · 27/02/2023 11:20

Mine is great and always gives me a set time when visiting any of my children (she's been with us for 5 years) so I'm sure it is possible

Midwives were a nightmare but I understand it as they may have longer appointments or be called to hospital but HVs surely have an idea how long each appointment will take them

AndTheSurveySays · 27/02/2023 11:23

Can't you just tell her you require an appointment time?

Bunnyishotandcross · 27/02/2023 11:24

Imo dc enjoying time in their own home is important..
A friend of mine had dc who literally half killed each other at home because they were dragged to every play group and soft play for the first 4 years of their lives! Literally out 9 til 4 every day.
Just Living at home is a great skill ime!

StarsSand · 27/02/2023 11:38

I'd tell her you will need to take the older child out this morning but you will stay local. Ask her to call you when she is 15 minutes away and you will meet her at your home.

Expecting you to wait at home all day is really unreasonable.

They did that to me, it drove me crazy so I put a stop to it. Sometimes you need to get out for your mental health or for the other children.

Original poster
WonderWoop · 27/02/2023 11:41

Have no number for her so can't get in touch

After this visit I will look to avoid home visits.

OP posts:
Original poster
WonderWoop · 27/02/2023 11:42

@Bunnyishotandcross I'm not dragging my DC to a class, just want to take them out for a walk for all of our sanity.

OP posts:
Isthisexpected · 27/02/2023 11:44

Yes that's really crap of her.

Singularity82 · 27/02/2023 11:47

Honestly, YABU. It won’t kill you to wait in for ONE morning. Hiwever, if you don’t see the value in her visits, that’s a separate issue, and it’s an optional service. Call the main office and decline all future visits.

Singularity82 · 27/02/2023 11:49

Isthisexpected · 27/02/2023 11:44

Yes that's really crap of her.

How is it crap of her? It’s not a clinic with set appointments. They’re very stretched at the moment, often covering colleagues workloads to cover sickness etc. you can’t always predict the length of a visit, sometimes things run over. Remember she won’t be only doing home visits, but other work such as safeguarding meetings with social services too, which are impossible to predict how long they’ll run on.
im sure she isn’t leaving the OP waiting round for her own amusement.

fruitandfibreg · 27/02/2023 11:51

@Bunnyishotandcross judgey 'friend' have you not thought that maybe they were dragged to every playgroup because they were terrors indoors?
Playgroups and classes are great.

Op yeah I wouldn't be happy either! Maybe ask for next time x

Mariposista · 27/02/2023 11:54

StarsSand · 27/02/2023 11:38

I'd tell her you will need to take the older child out this morning but you will stay local. Ask her to call you when she is 15 minutes away and you will meet her at your home.

Expecting you to wait at home all day is really unreasonable.

They did that to me, it drove me crazy so I put a stop to it. Sometimes you need to get out for your mental health or for the other children.

That is sensible.

Saddlesore · 27/02/2023 11:54

Use your time to suit you and your LOs. It's not acceptable for a health visitor to give you such a vague timescale and then expect you to accommodate that.

(But then I never did get on well with one particular health visitor who kept me waiting 45 mins in a clinic. When I did finally get in to see her, she did apologise but then said "I'm very busy." I replied "And I'm not?" That went well.)

ThreeLittleDots · 27/02/2023 11:57

They'll probably have at least 10 visits to make this morning.

You can opt out of HV service if you get no benefit.

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