What would you do: buying a house

[Booooot]

My husband and I have 2 children so the house we are looking to buy has to have a minimum of 3 bedroom. However we’ve recently decided we would quite like to have another baby.
With our budget, a 3 bed we could get a lovely large house with a big garden and everything we need, but 2 kids would have to share.
We could get a 4 bed, but the house would have to be much smaller and in a less nice area. But the kids would have a room each.

Everyone I k ow who had to share a bedroom as a child hated it so I feel quite against it but also don’t want to move from the lovely big house we’re in now to somewhere smaller.

What would you do?

Let two of them share. You could potentially move again when they're older

I hated it

How big is your current house is you’re describing it as lovely and big
i had to share a room and didn’t like it but it’s a fact of life for lots of people
House buying is always a compromise

I would always aim to have a bedroom per child by the teen years. I don't think it harms children to have otherwise (although DH who had to share growing up would say otherwise!) but it's usually preferential and that's what I'm aiming for when making decisions like these.

How old are your other 2? Would you be in a better position to upsize in a few years?

I would get the three bed. I

If the 4 bed is smaller than the 3 bed, could you divide a bedroom of the 3 bed? Or reconfigure it somehow? If the garden is big enough would extending in the future be possible? It seems wrong somehow to buy a smaller house because you'll have a bigger family.

It’s a 3 bed but the rooms are big and it’s over 4 stories. We currently live in a much cheaper area that where we’re moving to though.

Can you get a lovely, big, 3 bed with extension/loft conversion/big enough room to split in too/downstairs bedroom potential?

I would not have a third and get the nice big 3 bed with a lovely garden in a good area.

What's your current home like? Four storeys sounds like a nightmare. We're renting a 3 storey and it's a real pain - nothing is ever on the right floor, thundering chidlren sound really loud hurtling up and down the stairs and the room configurations limit us eg want DD on same floor as us but only two bedrooms on that floor - with an en suite no other bathroom. So we get woken up every time she needs the loo in the night.

Can you find a nice 3 bed that you can extend to the loft or to the side if needs must?

Me too.

We could extend in the future I guess we just don’t really want to. We just want to move and be done now really!

Some of my children shared and enjoyed it. They still talk of it fondly.

Yes sometimes there were arguments - but mine did/do get along very well in general.

I made sure there were other spaces for times when people wanted to be alone (we had a summer house for example).

Me too! Rather live comfortably with the two kids than stretch myself by having another and having to compromise on area. Kids sharing isn’t a long term solution. I have two teens, no way would they had been happy sharing from about 10 years old onwards. They need dpace and privacy too.

The other compromise would be turning a dining room into another bedroom as we were going to turn one into a playroom anyway. Not sure. Will have to see what’s about when our money is ready! I’m just so excited haha.

Kids sharing isn’t a long term solution This is not the case for many happy families.

I would not have a third and get the nice big 3 bed with a lovely garden in a good area

I do agree with this too, we have a large 4 bed but still opted for 2 children because we wanted a comfortable lifestyle with enough money and time focussed on the 2 kids, 3 would have been a stretch for us for the quality of life we wanted.

I would not have a 3rd child.

I'm in the same sort of situation with an unexpected 3rd and early on in the process of buying. We decided to move further out so we could afford a 4 bed. Right now we have one of each with my oldest being a 6yo boy. It didn't seem fair at all for him to need to share with a sibling 6.5 years younger. Especially when he was 18 and baby was 12. Or even when he is 12 and baby is 6.

I'd definitely have the third child! And everyone I know who shared absolutely LOVED it as a child. I'd say most of my friend's kids share rooms, even when there's spare rooms available. In fact, my goddaughter shares with both her siblings still, even though she's got a lovely much bigger room she could be in 🤣

I think unless you’re planning on moving again in the future (5-10 years) it would be madness to buy a 3 bed and then go on to have another child. You cannot imagine the rows having teenagers sharing, and in fairness it’s an age where a bit of privacy is needed. And if you converted a downstairs room to a bedroom wouldn’t this really compromise the space you have to live in? Don’t underestimate how much space is needed once the kids are beyond their pre-school years. And what if all 3 need to live at home in the future when they are either at uni, or starting a career?

I shared and it was totally fine! I was pretty happy when I got my own room when my elder sister moved out but I was 13/14 by then.

You say you’d ‘quite like’ to have another, not that you desperately want to, in which case I would get the lovely 3 bed and stick at two dc. I honestly can’t tell you how expensive things get as they get older, especially now as the government cover less and costs are growing. I’m currently paying hundreds for braces for one dc and wondering how to help fund university. I know that’s not what you asked, but when I was wondering about three I don’t think I realised.

Surely there will be other four beds with decent gardens. Doesn't need yo be a choice between specific houses