I think I've just been accused of racism at work

[Imlookingatapicture]

Panicking somewhat..

For context I'm the only Welsh person in our London office. Lots of banter around the football World Cup.

Chat started on teams (chat not video) re the 6 nations game tomorrow. Collegue (huge football fan, most vocal in the world cup) said 'I don't care about rugby. I'm half Welsh anyway'

I replied

'Oh I'm half English too. We all have our crosses to bear ;)'

Manager has just emailed me to say collegue above has complained, and it's not acceptable, especially given recent discussions around inclusion and diversity.

It was honestly just a joke, in the same vein as the world cup 'banter'

I know I shouldn't have put it on teams. Maybe context didn't come across.

How much shit am I in?

@TreadLight

Okaaay. I don't think you are going to understand. Just don't work for the HR ever. You'll end up costing the company tens of thousands.

Apart from the fact, that the crime in the link is Apples vs Oranges to this thread...
You're not saying that OP targeted and then victimised the colleague based on his racial identity?
Are you party to some incriminating evidence that no one else is aware of?

If we take away the certain threshold (mostly racially motivated crime, discrimination, and slurs) that exists to protect the minorities then... Everything is racism and there is no racism anymore.
Good luck to anyone encountering me in the workplace then. As most people can't "place" me, they often put their foot in their mouth. It's all very Lady Hussey but where are you REALLY from?! I'll start taking offence and claiming racism.

Crosses to bear is also a reference to Jesus carrying the cross upon which he was crucified. Could offend anyone with an issue with that particular secular view of the world. Even atheists. So probably shouldn’t have thrown Judeo Christian metaphors out willy nilly without knowing your audience would be receptive to them.

Still, live and learn, eh? We live in a hyper sensitive age of woke snowflakes. Someone will have got a few days off to recover from that traumatic event, and you’ll go to a few seminars laid on by some outside agency that specialises in the re-education of those who need their thinking checking.

Does your company have a safe room where staff can go and chill out if they hear bad words?

@WillowBeeT

Ha, someone else lives in the real world.

Here’s an idea, but it’ll cost you £30.
You can get them on Amazon.
Go into work, apologies.
“I’m really sorry if I offended you. I didn’t mean it. Here, I’ve bought you a spinal column.”

I hope the colleagues discuss female team sports for an equal amount of time weekly.

Otherwise (well that's a given! ) I deduct three stars from the workplace inclusivity star-chart.
The team re-education course involves cuffs, chair and a whole season of team netball.

That would have made me laugh. 🤣

Your comment about crosses to bear suggests he has a cross to bear being half Welsh too ie equal burdens.

I loathe all this bullshit racism stuff. There's real racism going on that everyone's ignoring and yet reacting to stuff like this!

OP you obviously work with a soft lad as thry call them in Liverpool!

Tha mi ag aontachadh gu tur. Gun teagamh gheibh an duine beag foighidneach rudeigin eile ri caoidh ge-tà.

Crosses to bear is also a reference to Jesus carrying the cross upon which he was crucified. Could offend anyone with an issue with that particular secular view of the world. Even atheists. So probably shouldn’t have thrown Judeo Christian metaphors out willy nilly without knowing your audience would be receptive to them.

Oh aye, right enough. Taking the Lord Thy God's crucifix in vain. Deduct 10 point for Judeo-Christian centric language.

Tha mi cinnteach gu bheil thu ceart. Tha e coltach ri tosser. Duilich, chan eil anns a' Ghàidhlig Albannach agam ach còmhradh.

oh look^ it turns out “tosser” has no translation from English.

Jesus Christ -what the actual fuck is wrong with people? People like your colleague are a major major blight on society (as is your manager and company). They are captured by an ideology whose aim is to destroy free speech actually sny as leech which is not preordained. If people can’t see how scary this is they need up give their head a wobble and read a couple of dystopian novels before they’re heavily edited/banned.

soon we will be afraid to say anything! If people can’t tell the difference between a bit of banter about one of the most privileged countries in the whole world and racism there’s not a lot of hope for humanity.. at this point I’m actually starting to hope for nuclear war. Although I suspect in putin presses the big red button they’ll be a bunch of 20 somethings with pink and blue hair whose last words will be “well Putin was entitled to live their best life, it’s so racist them being blamed, its the fault of the evil boomers buying all the houses”

Sorry, I'm yet to be convinced about Donald Trump or Tom Cruise ( tangerine is an issue)

Why would an atheist be offended by "cross to bear"? It's a figure of speech, not a statement of religious belief.

Do people get upset by lamb to the slaughter, fly in the ointment, fall from grace, apple of my eye, (wo)man after my own heart, another one bites the dust? Because they might want to check out the King James Bible ...

What do you suggest? Carting the OP off the room 101 and attaching a cage of rats to them???

What’s wrong with David Dickinson?

Sorry OP but you are going to get a lecture over this one. Think of it like this, if you had said you are half black African but we all have our crosses to bear then you can see immedietaly you would be bang out of order.

Racism is racism regardless of the person you are being racist too. I agree that far too many people are far too sensitive about small things but on this one you are rightly in hot water.

Once this has past, remember that whoever complained is an utter twat and needs to be 100% avoided except when actually necessary.

^ That. I'd have serious trust (lack of rapport) issues with whole office going forward, tbh.

I was responding to the OP's original question 'how much shit am I in?' I was trying to guess the company response. It's not my own response, I don't think she did anything wrong.

I was responding to the original post. I meant helpful to her to apologise as it might make her feel less worried as she asked 'How much shit am I in?' so I felt she sounded worried. Personally, I don't think she did anything wrong.

I'd go in on Monday and say you're really sorry for causing offence and on reflection can see how you could cause offence and want to apologise here and directly to the individual if they would be open to that and I'd ask if the company has any diversity and inclusion training you can undertake to refresh yourself.

My advice would be to take responsibility, apologise, try to make amends and try to do better.

This is the opposite of ‘woke’ you muppet.

This is bog-standard screeching about ‘reverse racism’ by exactly the kind of people who use the term ‘woke’: complete arseholes who hilariously think everyone else is a ‘snowflake’.

Destroying families 😂😂😂😂😂. Get a grip.

Sounds like he deliberately baited you.

Rise above.

I beg to differ.

This is merely emblematic of the “take offence” culture that ironically categorises some people as worthy of abuse and others as worthy of “protection”.

as in for example - the media tries hard to “protect” trans women who are men who go on to rape women in women’s prisons, and feminists scream about women’s rights - but if I choose to be a stay at home mum and cook for my husband every night i am allowed to be ridiculed and told I am letting the side down and that I “don’t work”.

you have been taken in. OP points out the tip of the iceberg.

my step grandkids are some of my most precious people, they are mixed race, the second anyone is racist towards them I would know and bloody hell I would deal with it straight away. You have lost perspective.

woke is the pretence that we cannot have opinions and must reduce everything to bland fence sitting in order that any opinion at all does not offend. It’s nothing at all to do with racism, sexism or anything else.

Wow this thread just leaves me so disheartened. Some of my best friends were made through work ( including finding my husband ). We used to form tight bonds through so many shared experiences- good and bad and we still regale over some of the more hilarious post work drinks etc . Is this all over now ?

I am from Australia - so don't understand the Welsh/English issues.
My workplace has a lot of banter about the AFL (Australian Football League) - and a lot of sledging amongst each other - it's all part of the sport. What's said isn't really offensive, but reading this thread, if it were to happen in the UK, there would be a lot of complaints from precious snow flakes.

I would prepare myself for various scenarios as to what the complaint is about.

Is it possible to turn it back on him, and make a complaint?

'I don't care about rugby. I'm half Welsh anyway' - is he actually half Welsh? Or could you say you found that offensive - you felt he was mocking you?

I would ask them to explain exactly how it's offensive, and would ask for time to reflect on what's said, before you respond, and also ask for a summary to be emailed to you.

If they push for you to apologise - then push back and insist you also receive an apology from him.

I would also suggest that they ban talking on the chat about non-related work topics, so that this sort of incident can be avoided in future. ;) Make them regret making this an issue.

Good luck with dealing with this ridiculous complaint.

WTAF???? Do you actually think she’s done anything wrong?