Friend Fishing for Info?

[Rain95]

AIBU in finding it hard to converse with a female friend who rarely gives details about her own life but asks a lot of questions about what I'm doing?

It's someone I've known for a very long time. It's always been this way.

On the off-chance it was slow fading, I deleted her number and made no effort, but every day or so she'd continue to ask how I am.

Not sure if she's just not great at messaging, though conversations tend to go as below:

Her: How are you?

Me: Good, thanks. Doing xyz.

Her: Good, thanks.

There is nothing to build on. Even when I ask open questions I tend to get a very brief response.

In contrast, she asks a lot about what I'm doing. Sometimes I'll just say things I'm involved in so there's something to build on, but this makes me look self-absorbed.

If it's relevant, in person she tends to gossip a lot about other people.

YABU - Some people are very reserved
YANBU - Fishing for info

Maybe try actually calling her to have a conversation. I much prefer talking to people. I do this with one or two friends, will text to ask if they are available for a chat, then grab a coffee or wine and call.

It's much nicer.

I think it's odd that you have interpreted this as 'fishing for info'. To me, this seems like a person who wants to retain a friendship group but is really not good at it when not in person.

Just give her short answers like she does you.
Her: What you up to?
You: busy with family hope you have a nice day!
If she replies ignore it r reply much later again with a brief comment that shuts the conversation down. I wouldn't even bother ask about her.

My honest opinion is that this is somebody that you're not likely to ever have a close friendship with. One where you find out about the person's life and what they really think and feel.

You know that, you deleted her and avoided contact. You must have know it wasn't a friendship you were getting much from. You've known her for a while by the sound of it, and it doesn't sound like she's ever been any different, so I don't think she ever will be.

It sounds as if she's making you feel uncomfortable with her constant questioning and then not sharing anything about herself. She doesn't want to, and it doesn't sound nice that she likes to gossip about others when you see her.

I don't think this is a friendship you should invest any more effort in. You've tried hard enough and never made any real connection with her. Turn your attention to other friends, or find new friends where there's a much better interaction and you can build rapport. She's not really on your wavelength for whatever reason, not really a friend in the true sense of the word.