Do I need to give up alcohol completely?

[MaggieMaze]

I just did Dry Jan - and it wasn't that hard after the first few days.

But it's only the 19th Feb and I'm back to almost every day. Even on the days where I'm not drinking (Monday, Tuesdays) - I think about wine. Like I'm weighing it up. I never get drunk. But I do drink enough that reading a book etc is hard at the end of the night.

I gave up booze with all 3 pregnancies easily. And as I say - just did Dry Jan and it wasn't too painful. But I can't seem to moderate. If I have wine in the house - I will have a glass or three.

have 2 young kids, work full time, husband and me have our issues, been through quite a bit over the years - as well have.

I did Dry Jan to show to myself I could. But I promised I wouldn't drink today - and instead get ready for the week with a clear head, but I'm two glasses in and it's only 6pm.

Do I need to stop completely? the thought is surreal almost to me.

I never get drunk. But I do drink enough that reading a book etc is hard at the end of the night

I think that sounds as though you are drunk by the end of the night? Maybe not staggering around drunk, but still drunk?

Only you can decide if you have a problem and/or if you want to give up. Have a look on the Freedom thread, there are some wise heads there (but you should only post if you have decided to give up).

Well done for completing dry January! 😊not many in my circle can do it! It sounds to me like you are developing an unhealthy relationship with alchohol, especially as you didn't want to drink today but had a couple of glasses anyway.

Its a tough one to say what to do, i used to be the same with smoking and would promise myself "oh I'll only have 1 before lunch" and end up having 3! For me stopping cold turkey was the only thing that worked and now im able to socially smoke on the (very occasional!) Night out with friends, could you try not having wine in the house normally and only for special occasions?

On A Mission To Moderate or Absolutely Abstaining? Join us for encouragement, support and non - judgemental chat.

try this thread above which is supporting those if us who want to moderate our drinking - sorry dont know how to do a proper link!

It sounds like you do need give up if you can't moderate or not drink alcohol that's in the house. Maybe unpick the reasons why you drink as that will help you understand. I drink because it feels like a treat after a long day so I only ever drink that the weekends unless we have a special night out planned in the week (rare). I do feel I still need a treat though so have a lovely long pampering bath twice a week were I shave, exfoliate, clarify my hair and give it a hair mask, use nice scents in my bath, exfoliate my face and put a face mask on. I then slather myself in creams and feel so relaxed I go to sleep early.

You're drinking enough each day to get drunk. It's dangerous to just stop. Things like dry January can be dangerous when your body has become reliant on alcohol. As an alcohol and substance misuse worker, you need to give up but you need to do it safely. Wean yourself off it and not just point blank stop.

It does sound as if you are on the way to developing a problem with alcohol. If on the days you don’t drink you are preoccupied with drinking you are becoming dependent.

Have you sought help with this?

What was the difference in yourself when you were not drinking in january?
Did you sleep better?did you feel better?have a bit more money?do you drink to help you stop thinking of things?
comparing January and February,in which month did you feel emotionally and physically better?
I think by looking deeper into this you will find the answers you want.when you are ready.🌈

I could have written this and have a lot of the same stresses, also my clothes are getting tighter with all these extra calories!

I’ve decided to give up - not forever but for now and see how I go, if it’s something I think of constantly I think I will have the answer that it’s become a problem!

Hopefully it’s just a habit that needs breaking! Good luck

tbh the fact that you're asking yourself this question means that deep down you know you're in a danger zone with alcohol.

What do you think?

I've just downloaded the Drink Aware app and although this has been an unusual week with a few celebrations, was a bit horrified to see my units totalled up. The app is designed to encourage you to drink less the next week so to me, this feels like a bit of a competition with myself. I will definitely aim to half this week's units and then gradually trim it down from there.

The app is worth a look!

People tend to think that ‘ordinary’ drinkers are ok, and alcoholics need to abstain. There are actually a lot of people who fit in between these two categories as “grey area” drinkers. Some grey area drinkers find abstinence works better for them (especially if they tend to take an all or nothing type approach), and some find strict moderation works ok.
There are some really useful apps out there to support you with either approach- whether you want to quit or whether you want to cut down and feel able to control.
I hope it goes well for you, OP 🤗

I stopped completely and it's one of the best things I ever did.
I'm fitter, I sleep better, I eat better (no "oh let's just order a takeaway" after a couple of glasses of wine) and that sense of dread and unease I used to get the morning after having even one or two glasses just isn't there any more.

Sounds like you are alcohol dependent and it is better if you give up because you are unable to moderate.

Yes. You are obviously a bit all or nothing so none would be the better option

I’m the same OP. I really enjoy a drink but when I open a bottle I’ll have 2-3 glasses when I only set out to have one. I’d probably drink 2 bottles a week at home, which isn’t loads but I’d wind up feeling crummy. I did dry January too and felt so much better in the mornings, made my anxiety much less too, I’ve had a few drinks between but stopped buying a couple of bottles in my weekly shop so it’s not so habitual now.

I'm just trying with stopping now. I did dry Jan and really missed alcohol to an unhealthy degree. Then it has crept back in to almost every weekend. Followed by catching nearly every bug going as it lowers our immune system.

So after all this and years of not being able to moderate I think it's time to ditch was is effectively poison. It does nothing for us and so much bad stuff. Just getting my head around the social side of things and learning to be ok without it when at parties etc.

But I will. :)

Feel a lot better without out

Good luck!!

I really don't think willpower works with alcohol. Alan Carrs the easy way is good

You really have a distorted relationship with alcohol. I would kindly suggest you seek some support to work out can you have a healthy attitude towards it .