How do I get my sick baby to breastfeed again

[MehMilkyMama]

Hi, I'm really down because I have a very sick baby in hospital who I am very worried about, so I am a little emotionally fragile.

My firstborn couldn't breastfeed. I literally pumped for months desperate for the experience but it just didn't happen.

So I went into my second pregnancy with the mindset of it might or might not happen.

So I was overjoyed when my newborn latched and I was able to exclusively breast feed within three weeks. Baby was doing so well, lactation consultants signed me off, great latch, good appetite. I was so happy.

However, now I'm in hospital and baby is not feeding. No idea what is wrong with her yet but it doesn't look like it's getting better. Anyway, I had to give in today and give baby a bottle as no proper feed in well over four hours.

I'm really quite upset about it. I felt so proud of us both for getting there with the breastfeeding and now on top of worry for my baby I'm worried baby will refuse the breast.

I know for some people it wouldn't be a big deal and as I ended up bottle feeding my first I know there are advantages to bottle, but I really don't want to have to if I can help it and finding the possibility quite upsetting.

Has anyone else had a baby with reduced feeding they've had to tube or bottle feed and managed to get them back to exclusive breast feeding please? I know fed is best as I did it with my first but really want to do all I can to protect breastfeeding as it's important to me, and I particularly don't want to be forced into bottle feeding by horrible circumstances as I feel it would always be a reminder of how it wasn't a choice. (This was the case with my first and I found it really emotionally difficult)

So far I'm trying to pump, though not always possible as hospital aren't always able to sterilise etc. I'm putting on the breast regularly, breast compressions, waking with nappy changes (trying to, very lethargic)

Please please help if you managed it. Everything feels very bleak at the moment:(

Hi OP. So sorry to hear about your LO being unwell. Fingers crossed baby is better soon.

Not the same situation, but I have an almost 3 week old and just this week I was admitted back into hospital due to complications with my c section recovery. My LO wasn't with me for the first 12 hours, so DH gave him formula at home. I also paused on breastfeeding for two whole days in order to let my body rest and recover.

This meant I was having to pump and give him EBM as well as top ups of formula. So he had feeds from a bottle for two days and no breast whatsoever! I did notice my supply was dipping as I was pumping and noticing I was getting less and less. A midwife on the ward suggested I just get baby back on the breast (providing I felt well enough), which I did.

When he got back to breastfeeding, there was a definite difference in his latch. He'd clearly got so used to the bottle that his latch became so shallow. It really upset me. But we stayed persistent and continued to practice the latch every single feed. I offered him the breast frequently, even when he wasn't necessarily due a feed but just kept putting him on me to increase exposure and build supply again. We are now back home after our hospital stay after 4 days and back to feeding as usual.

I'm sorry I know its not the same situation as it may not be possible for you to be so persistent with the feeding having an unwell LO. But I hope things work out for you the way you want them to and wishing your baby a speedy recovery. ❤️

Thank you, yes I'm finding it so difficult because it's mostly down to baby and out of my control.

Do you have any tips how to correct the latch? It wasn't easy getting there with the latch and we literally only just got it so I was happy and bam were rushed to hospital.

How old is baby OP?

If baby isn't able do be on the breast so frequently I would really suggest pumping to continue mimicking the feeding. I'm so surprised your hospital aren't able to sterilise for you? Do the hospital have pumps that they provide? I took my pump into hospital with me but never actually used it once as the hospital one was fab.

In terms of correcting the latch, I would literally take baby off me each time his latch was shallow and try, try and try again. It made feeds a bit longer but it helped. Do you have a local infant feeding team you have access to? When my baby was a week old, I'd booked onto a video call with our local team and they supported me with his latch etc.

Also the infant feeding team had sent me this link, it may help:

www.unicef.org.uk/babyfriendly/baby-friendly-resources/breastfeeding-resources/positioning-and-attachment-video/

Thank you. Baby is three weeks so we literally just got there with breastfeeding. There is a pump but they share it with the maternity unit so I can't have it as frequently as I would like as it's shared.
I'm getting my husband to bring my old pump I used with my first baby but not sure it even still works.
Latch when baby even tries is so shallow at the moment but am reluctant to correct as it results in baby giving up.

I can't believe how sad I am about this. I think it's just because I thought we'd nailed it.

Here to give you a handhold as I am sure you are exhausted and stressed to the max with all that is going on. You don’t say how old your baby is, or what symptoms have brought you into hospital, but as a general bit of reassurance I can say that having cared for hospitalised babies for well over a decade, there is every reason to be optimistic that you will get back to exclusive breastfeeding once your baby recovers. I can think back to hundreds of babies who have had breastfeeding interrupted for various reasons - being nil by mouth, requiring tube feeds, being physically unable to feed directly at the breast etc etc, and the proportion not being able to go back to breastfeeding has been very small. So try not to let your fears spiral, and whilst baby is unwell make sure you are doing all the usually recommended things to maintain your supply. Pumping regularly overnight will be absolutely key here, and the staff have a responsibility to ensure that you have access to all the sterile equipment needed to do this. Please explain your concerns to the nursing staff and ask if there is a paediatric dietician / infant feed specialist or similar that can come to talk to you tomorrow. Likewise make sure the treating doctors know that maintaining and resuming breastfeeding is very important to you. Finally, I would recommend calling the La Leche League or similar for advice as they will be well experienced in helping mothers in this situation. Best of luck, and be kind to yourself.

Oh of course, that makes sense about not having access to the pump as I'm assuming baby is on a children's ward? I think I was able to access it so frequently as I was re admitted to the post-natal ward. Ah that's rubbish :( but glad you have an old one you can use. Hopefully it works for you. You could always try and hand express although I've never had any experience of this.

If you can, definitely try and correct the latch and practice loads with it. Not correcting the latch could lead to baby not having full feeds, not able to reach the hindmilk but also could result in a very painful experience for you! I hope it works out for you.

Thank you @Puddlelane123 . I did already express my worries to the staff but as it was between sobs I am not sure the message was well conveyed. I'm just so pessimistic because of what happened with my first child so thank you for a more optimistic message. Hopefully I can be one of the lucky ones because I have had as much bad luck as I can bear.

Yeah will try and latch baby on in a few hours but I don't have high hopes

Sorry OP, just saw your update. Not ideal at all that you have limited access to the pump. In my hospital (admittedly a large childrens hospital) there are at least 4 per ward, but I appreciate that isnt the case in smaller hospitals. I know there are companies you can rent them from if you are not in a position to purchase one yourself, although I know that won’t help you tonight. Maintaining your supply by pumping / and maintaining your comfort / reducing your risk of mastitis etc is absolutely crucial if baby isnt feeding normally, and the hospital has a duty of care to make sure this happens. Is there a NICU on site they could borrow a breast pump from?

Yes desperately want to maintain my supply. Do you know the best plan for that, should I try and feed baby, then pump after or in-between feeds or any other way?

Pump I've been given is shared with maternity but hopefully I can get it every three or four hours, do you think that will be enough?

Baby is also spluttering at the breast as well, so don't want to overdo it either incase oversupply is an issue.

A good friend had significant feeding problems with both her children (inverted nipples with first, something baby related with the second I think). For both kids it took about 2 months to establish feeding from the breast, otherwise she pumped and did tube feeding on the breast. I think she generally steered clear of bottles in favour of tube feeding. She said it was absolutely hell and absolutely not worth it but she was so locked into the idea that she HAD to breast feed that she struggled to stop and then eventually with both kids it worked out.

So this is sort of both sides - she was successful at getting both kids to breast feed exclusively and neither did when they were born, so you're way further along there, (and did then for a year for both) but it was really bloody hard. I would HIGHLY recommend considering getting a wireless pump, Willow or Evie for example, they are a complete game changer if you're going to do a lot of pumping.

Ideally you’d want to be pumping every 2-3 hours overnight if baby isn’t feeding from you herself, but every 3-4 hours will also be fine. The breasts produce milk on a supply and demand basis, so you’ll need to make sure that they get the same or similar level of stimulation they would have had prior to feeding being interrupted, which with a 3 week old I imagine was pretty frequent feeding. I obviously can’t comment on what you should be doing in terms of putting baby to the breast as that will depend on her condition / symptoms etc (have the nursing and medical staff given you a plan for this?? They should have), but if her condition allows it then little and often js usually key in sick babies, and skin to skin cuddles will help keep the hormones flowing if she is well enougg for this. And hard as it can be in hospital, make sure you don’t neglect your own food and fluid intake. Anecdotally I know mums who swear by mainlining oat milk and flapjacks in these situations.

Has anyone suggested nipple shield's to you? They were a life saver with my first who was bottle fed the first few days because she couldn't latch. I ended up using them for 3-4 months before baby could latch without them.

Definitely pump when you can, even just express a little in the shower. Your supply will increase faster than baby's appetite after they've been so poorly, so don't worry too much about supply, it will bounce back.

I would speak to the nurses again, they really should be doing all they can to support breastfeeding, as it's in the baby's best interest to continue. Ask if they have a lactation support person that can come.

As for the spluttering, try to express a little before latching on - just into a towel/cloth, makes breast bit softer and easier to latch, letdown less overwhelming for baby. Also try different holds, the football hold is good if they are getting too much, too quickly. Try to resist "top up bottles" as this is a cycle that baby feeds from bottle with different sucking action, so is lazy on the breast, breasts don't think baby needs as much milk and the cycle continues.

Hope your little one is better soon.

Where abouts are you op? I have a hospital grade pump plus a Medela swing pump. Happy to bring to you if nearby. All sterile and ready to go.
Keep offering boob, plus as much skin to skin as you can now and at home. The biggest supply killer is stress. Try as hard as it is to rest and relax. So hard to do when you babe is poorly, more so when doctors don't know why.

Good luck, don't give up!

Mine was older, but we were able to re-establish breastfeeding. Pumping definitely, and giving that milk by bottle or tube helped. Also just keeping trying was really important and lots of skin to skin whenever possible.

Lots of sympathy, OP. I think most of all I just didn't want breastfeeding to end like that for us, with no choice or decision in the middle of a situation where I felt helpless already. Keep your supply going and you have time.

Sending much love x
We had lots of feeding problems (incl 2 hospital stays) and I was pumping and feeding with a bottle until 10 weeks when we managed to get back to breast.
Don't panic, you have time to resolve this.
Main things are to keep your baby fed, keep your baby close (skin to skin as much as you are able) and keep your milk flowing (pump).

Ask you midwife team/health visitor as well as the hospital if there are pumps to borrow. I hired one from medela and then also got spare parts to make it easier to keep on top of cleaning.

Try and pump at least every 3 hours. Also take a look at power pumping where you pump multiple times in an hour or closer together once or twice a day to stimulate a newborn. It's particularly important to pump in the early hours (2-5am) due to hormones at that time to stimulate your supply.

Lookup paced feeding, which is when you use a bottle at the right angle so baby takes the milk on demand rather than pouring down its throat... It helps to avoid bottle preferences of expecting fast immediate flow of milk.

You can use a Milton cold water tank in hospital for sterilisation, its a big tub with a lid and you use a tablet and cold water, pick up at boots or amazon- you need to just refresh it once each 24hrs.

Get onto la leche league/local groups for more support. Call the breastfeeding helpline - it's staffed by mums who have been trained up and they are there to chat and support you.

Xxxxx

My first baby had to be bottle fed at first (using my milk, pumped) as the hospital needed to monitor how much he got. He got used to the bottle so wouldn't take the breast when allowed back to breast. He was used to the instant milk from a bottle and didn't understand that he needed to suckle for a few seconds before the breast let down the milk. I was given a syringe with some soft tubing on the end and advised to express a small amount and put in the syringe. Put baby to breast and slide tubing on syringe into the corner of his mouth and squeeze a little milk in. I had to do this for about 24 hours and he soon got the idea that breast equalled milk. We never looked back after that. Good luck with your baby! I always felt lucky to be able to breast feed as it was just so much easier.

Thank you for the advice everyone, lots to think about. Hope I can get through this xx