'Nicola Bulley's reputation 'destroyed' by police'

[MyrtIe]

Article here

The points made about victim blaming and the police disclosing this information to cover themselves are spot on imo.

The usual gutter press are having a field day with this today.

What exactly was the point of it? What's it achieved, apart from compounding the heartache of her loved ones?

YABU - the police were right to divulge this sensitive information as it was relevant to the investigation

YANBU - there was absolutely no need to do so

I was listening to the radio yesterday and heard the full press conference. I was absolutely shocked with the presentation, the police were so unprofessional. They seemed so pissed off at the public having opinions and made numerous digs at them and blamed social media/the public/press into forcing them into revealing things that they shouldn’t. They should rise above that and not engage in speculation and rumours and victim blame.

Yes all the armchair critics and detectives have caused this. Shame on them.

If she is hiding out somewhere it's not exactly going to entice her to come back is it.

'All the armchair detectives need to stop' 'ghouls' 'stop playing cluedo'

These childish insults are inappropriate, insensitive and unhelpful.

A woman is missing, the police do not instil confidence, for example talking about privacy and refusing to be drawn on vulnerabilities one minute then releasing these exact private details the very next.

Not sure why people keep trying to silence women. Barring accusing the family which would of course be wrong, I see no problem whatsoever with scrutinising the police's about turns regarding releasing this info for starters.

The whole handling of this is bizarre to me. The unusual amount of attention it has received and the armchair detectives have probably led to them having to divulge this. I really do hope she is found safely but I do find everything about how it has been handled by the media and public generally very odd.

No her private medical information should NOT have been released either at the beginning of now, to the baying hungry crowds. Haven't people got anything better to do? Work? Children? Nothing?

I can see this going the same way as the madeleine mccann threads.

My heart goes out to her family, especially her children. I hope they get some closure.

I was quite shocked when I heard it on the radio, as I don't understand why it was relevant to the public. But on the other hand, I'm not police officer, nor detective, so I might not have a clue. I read the news, but don't really try to come up with theories where she might be. The only thing that annoyed me was daily mail posting pictures of NB with drink. Her and boyfriend holding glass of champagne, NB out for drinks with friends. Did they look up her social media accounts or what?

@BentleyRhythmAce you know that many people are “functioning alcoholics”, right?
A functioning alcoholic can continue to appear completely normal to their friends and acquaintances, get tasks completed, generally be a good member of Society Etc. Once they are “outed”, their reputation is irreversibly trashed by many people - you only have to read the experience of honest ex-alcoholics to see that this is true…
The fact is, that being able to carry on life appearing to be perfectly normal but with too much alcohol in your bloodstream has been known about for hundreds of years (take a close look at this issue in the Nordic countries)…
The problem in this case is that the wording used by both the Police and the Media is weasel - an expression of “care”, when they really only want to use it to either shift blame, or sensationalise respectively.

But why? My friend went missing a few years ago. We knew she was suicidal and had substance abuse issues, the police knew she was suicidal and had substance abuse issues and it was no one else's business. What if by some miracle my friend had have been found safe? Would you want the whole town knowing your business like that? Why should they know?

This.

Its been poorly handled from start to finish. The misogyny is shocking.

If she was really that vulnerable why on earth would the family have no issue with her driving the children alone? The police are manipulating the facts to fit their narrative.

Explains why the area wasn't sealed off as a crime scene and also why the police have been so sure she went into the water. It's looking increasingly likely she went wherever she went through choice and alone.

Maybe don’t make a post with the title her reputation has been destroyed !!
Why should having alcohol issues be seen as destroying someone’s reputation? It is an illness, quite often as a result of people using alcohol to self medicate as they’re not getting the support and help they need for other issues. Saying it destroys someone’s reputation can only lead to more people hiding the issues they may have with alcohol instead of speaking up and accessing help.
Alcohol issues only destroy someone’s reputation because of how we see it as a society instead of as an illness that needs treatment and support.
I know it can destroy other peoples lives who are around someone with a drink problem but saying this has destroyed Nicola’s reputation isn’t going to help anyone! If as a society we were more open about alcohol problems and that it can affect anyone, even a relatable school mum like Nicola , she may have been able to get the help she so dearly needed.
The police have stated that they are still looking and investigating all avenues. I pray that she has decided she needs some time out and that she is found and able to get the help she needs. If she is , having titles on SM about her reputation being destroyed helps no one, especially Nicola.

I have absolutely no faith in police in the UK. They’re an embarrassment.

If I was raped tomorrow I wouldn’t report it. I wouldn’t trust them to do a good job.

Lancs Police were absolutely abhorrent to disclose personally information in a case that is eliciting more tittle tattle and speculation than the National Enquirer.

Theyve fucked this up royally and tried to cover their backs. Heads should roll. Policing should be better than this.

Yes people seemed to get into some sort of frenzy and were doing unreasonable stuff. All they did was interfere with the work the police were doing.

I think the information is relevant. It now seems more likely that she could have taken herself off somewhere due to troubles in her personal life rather than being abducted. Her husband said she was very organised that morning, sounds like she might have been planning something.
The new information may make people who weren’t in the immediate vicinity of the lake think about if they had seen her. Hate to speculate tbh, but I hope she is alive and just had a plan to get away. If that is the case she could be anywhere.

As I've said, I haven't followed the case. The headlines today jumped out at me for the reasons I've given.

I saw one very unpleasant thread here with some very nasty speculation and that's it. I had no idea people were posting maps and YouTube videos, as PPs have said.

This isn't a thread for speculation - I was just appalled by the headlines today and the fact that the police disclosed sensitive, personal information which gave the gutter press the fuel for those headlines.

As another poster said, they did similar with Claudia Lawrence. It absolutely does smack of sexism and at a time when the police seem to have a pretty dim view of women generally.

I thought that and it was as if the press conference was only taking place because they wanted to shut the public up, it was all very odd. Why didn’t they just do regular updates and state she was vulnerable from the start?

The worst bit of the press conference was when someone asked a question to do with the public and the lady laughed and said ‘I’ll take this one’ 😳 It’s not actually about them, it’s about a missing mum. Yes I’m sure some members of the public have been overly involved and possibly getting in the road but if it was been sealed off like you’d expect they would never of had that problem. Surely they can rise above any inappropriate social media comments and focus on their investigation

If she went to AA, then they probably wouldn't, no. It's called Alcoholics ANONYMOUS for a reason.

The public, media and social media, including mumsnet are responsible for this

Yes, they are - though the police aren't without responsibility either

As said, they're not obliged to kowtow to silly noise from others; it's a question of judgement, and IMO rather more is needed

So the public don't think the police are doing their job, thus require and have the right to all this womans private information to enable them to go and investigate themselves?

This is one fucked up world. Social media and the monster it has created has a lot to answer for.

I think the police are damned if they do and damned if they don't. They told the public and and to explain what they meant by vulnerable.

Michelle after dark lives locally to the area I like her streams which gives facts and a no nonsense tour of the areas.

Beyond saying she's vulnerable, her health issues have got absolutely nothing to do with anyone other than the police and her family. The police knew from the outset - this isn't new information. There were ways to deal with this at the beginning and deciding to blame the public for disclosing this extremely private information, the police just highlight what a shit job they've done with communication.

What are they trying to achieve? Everyone to assume she's killer herself or somehow her disappearance is justified and to stop thinking about it?

Aspiringmatriarch · Today 11:39

This is clutching at straws, surely. If so then someone would recognise her regardless of the information being divulged - her face is everywhere.

Can you guarantee that?

If she doesn't want to be found - she might have changed her appearance

How many homeless people do you see on the streets curled on the floor covered in blankets - how many times have you gone over to them and checked up close to see if its Nicola?

If you haven't done it - other people won't either

I feel incredibly angry that they have released this information, especially as it seems to be as a direct result at their ability being doubted by the public. The armchair detectives like on the threads on here, idiots on tiktok etc have gone on and on about not believing the police despite them saying there were very valid reasons for their hypothesis.

We can’t necessarily stop the horrible threads like on here, (fuck knows what number the obsessives are on now), or posts on tiktok, but the police should absolutely not give in to these people constantly questioning.

I think we should all be feeling quite annoyed that should our families be involved in a high profile case, that the idiot armchair detectives and vultures need for gossip, could mean that ours or our loved ones very personal information, could be released to them.

How fucking dare the police do this? And seemingly because they couldn’t just ignore the idiots like those who are obsessed with this case, who are posting photos of cameras not working and maps of the area, insisting the police are wrong despite knowing fuck all. Should the police not be above giving in to these vultures? As long as their processes are thorough, other teams are checking to make sure nothing is overlooked, they should ignore the public’s demands when they do not need that information.