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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

... to wonder if people really have bucket lists?

37 replies

MindMyRead · 15/02/2023 20:19

Discussion with my DSis who recently turned 50. It seems she's created a list of things that she's not done or experienced, or places or events she's not tried and so on. I've heard the concept of course, but I don't know anyone who's formally done something like that?

YABU - I have a bucket list
YANBU - That's crazy! I've never had such a list

On a personal level there are many things/places/events I'd like to do. Of course I'd like my indie band to play at Glastonbury(but we're not good!), I'd like to shag Brad Pitt (I'd have to check with DH first), etc. ... but why write them on a list?

The list of things from DSis seems like things she should just go and do, or they're things that are very unlikely to happen.

OP posts:
BuddhaAtSea · 15/02/2023 21:48

@StealthToddler hugs. Love your living list!

I’ve always had one on the go, the last one was , 40 things before I’m 40, I did most of it. I think. Can’t really remember to be honest.
Now there’s a thought, 50 things to do before I’m 50?
Last time my list was more of tool to spur me on. The ones in my youth had stuff like learn to drive.

I’ve done so much in my life. I think I just want to do little things now. I’m still not signing up for that marathon though, sod that 😂

Inthe60s · 15/02/2023 22:16

I think the concept makes a lot of sense. Looking back there are things I wished I’d don’t in my 20s or 30s. I can’t do them a today ( for a variety of reasons ).

There are general everyday type of things I try to be aware of, like eating well, exercise, being more thoughtful of DH and kids. These are not the things for my list.

the bucket list type of things are more once off things I’ve never done, but really do want to try, and are realistic. Drive coast to coast in the US, visit the area of our old family home (Southern Rhodesia), and a few more personal ones I’ll not detail here ;)

PurpleParrotfish · 15/02/2023 22:16

@StealthToddler I hope you get to Rome. Flowers
I don’t have a bucket list.
Partly because I did some travelling when I was younger but don’t feel I can justify the carbon footprint of long haul now, particularly x 4 for a family. And partly because I’m more interested in thinking of smaller things that I can do now, this month or this year (having said that, there are some New Year good intentions I ought to get on with!)

CherrySocks · 15/02/2023 22:35

I'm surprised some people haven't heard of a bucket list (ie things to do before you 'kick the bucket').
It can give people nice things to look forward to, or people set themselves challenges to give more meaning to life. They can be experiences you want to have, or places you want to go, or things you want to achieve.

butterfliedtwo · 15/02/2023 22:40

I do. Chronic illness and pain focuses my mind. There are things I want to do before I physically can't.

Quveas · 15/02/2023 22:43

I'm 65/ I don't have time to write a bucket list. I am too busy doing stuff that might have been on it if I hadn't already done it.

Quveas · 15/02/2023 22:44

That said - if you haven't seen the film... www.imdb.com/title/tt0825232/

CuteCillian · 15/02/2023 22:45

I recently said to DH we probably should jot down things and places we want to do/go. We tend to buy each other trips or experiences at birthdays and Christmas, and it would be informative to know where and what we would each like.
I think I prefer to call it a living list rather than a bucket list, and we'll probably not get around to it.

JamSandle · 15/02/2023 22:47

Yabu. It helps focus me on what I want to experience in life. I love the satisfaction of ticking things off.

RedToothBrush · 15/02/2023 22:50

Talking about this with friends at the weekend. They have a bucket list.

I got upset after leaving cos I don't and I felt like I don't have much ambition etc etc.

DH had to calm me down and say how many things on the friends bucket list I'd done, even though they were ten years older.

He made the point we don't need a list. If we want to do, we just do ...

Tbh now I'd rather just enjoy a lot of simpler things rather than the big goals anyway

dizzydizzydizzy · 15/02/2023 23:02

I haven't written down my bucket list but I do have one in my head. Just been to a place
That has been in the list since the early 90s!

Tillow4ever · 15/02/2023 23:48

I have one - it's written down in the back of my diary. Every year when I get my new one for Christmas, I copy the list into the new book.

I started it about 4 years ago now.

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