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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Is husband paying fair share

11 replies

Passivhaus · 14/02/2023 00:20

Husband is a terrible saver and wastes money right left and centre. He currently probably has around £400 of his £2300 per month after taxes and pays the rest into the joint account to cover all bills. AIBU that he could get by with what is essentially £300 fun money?

OP posts:
Kate8990 · 14/02/2023 00:30

Do you split the cost of bills?

Littlebluedinosaur · 14/02/2023 00:35

How much do you contribute to bills and save from your salary?

AnneLovesGilbert · 14/02/2023 00:39

Not much detail to go on. What’s your contribution?

Bubblesandsqueak1 · 14/02/2023 01:08

Depends on how much you pay in and have left over should be equal

Lovinmyblanket · 14/02/2023 01:11

Is it just fun though? Does it include his phone contact, anything to do with his car, Netflix - or is absolutely everything paid jointly except for nights out and clothes? Paying a gym membership or other hobby adds up too. Depends what you can afford though - we keep £500 each for personal money but we do quite a lot with that.

steff13 · 14/02/2023 03:13

What percentage of each of your income goes toward bills?

JudgeRudy · 14/02/2023 03:29

Yes, as others have said not enough to go on. If there's one income coming in I think you should both have the same 'picket money' each week but I don't think you can force him to save if he doesn't want to.
This does make stuff like holidays and large purchases tricky let alone pension. You need to meet in the middle.
If you're both earning, particularly if you don't have shared children I think the split should be pro rata. If you earn less you pay in less, but you probably get less spending money too.

Snoozysnoozy · 14/02/2023 07:03

So far asi can tell on MN the split should be:

Man earns more, all money goes into one pot bills paid and remaining money split 50:50. Anything less shall be considered financial abuse

Woman earns more, each pays the proportion that they earn and what's left out of your post is yours. Any suggestion that he gets any of her money means he's a "cocklodger"

BarbaraofSeville · 14/02/2023 07:43

£400 monthly spending money isn't an enormous amount if you can afford it, and doesn't especially square with 'wasting money left right and centre'.

Is £1900 from him into the joint account enough to cover all joint costs including annual and irregular ones like Christmas, holidays, white goods replacement etc?

How much do you earn and put into the joint account. The fairest way is that you're left with equal personal money to spend/save as you wish.

Do you both pay for things like cars/work travel and mobiles individually or do these come out of the joint account?

Without the answers to those questions, it's impossible to say. But it sounds like you have different attitudes to money, but it's only really an issue if one of you is spending more than is affordable or a disproportionate share of the spare money, meaning that the individual or the family is in debt, or you don't have money to spend on yourself.

gamerchick · 14/02/2023 07:44

Not enough context. How much do you put in to compare?

jitteryquick · 14/02/2023 10:56

More info needed OP. £300/400 isn't a huge amount for a month depending on what you mean by "fun" money.

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