"I cheated because I was insecure" Really????

[BasilParsley]

www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-11742583/Watch-moment-tearful-Ben-Ofoedu-admits-DID-cheat-Vanessa-Feltz.html

Am I being unreasonable to feel that the guy who went and dipped his wick somewhere else because he felt insecure is not worth having back? If you are feeling insecure, surely the last thing you would do is screw someone else? Or maybe blokes think that's an OK thing to do?

I’m a strong believer in the cause of the behaviour being less important than the impact of the behaviour on others.

Poor him, he’s insecure.

No excuse for his partner enduring him being unfaithful though - ever!

It doesn't matter what he thinks made him do it, he still did it.

There's no excuse in the book that makes it acceptable.

Well I'm not really surprised that an insecure person makes bad choices. Doesn't make it OK.

Women do it and then justify by not getting attention, having issues with not feeling wanted, too busy with children heaps of other reasons

Well thank god she didn’t marry him.

Blames everyone but himself - he did it because he could.
He needs to own up to his own behaviour and not blame everyone else - the other women, the first husband etc etc

Actually I do believe that a huge majority of people cheat because they are insecure and have low self esteem however that’s never an excuse nor does it warrant pity

Of course, insecurity could be his reason.
We make bad decisions when we feel bad about ourselves.

And of course a person would have boundaries and not allow cheating - for any reason.

Both are true.

He made a choice

this is part of his ploy to get Vanessa back and it wouldn’t surprise me if it worked then publicly they rebuild their relationship

I agree. I think they need the attention/validation. An explanation does not equal an excuse though.

Agree - he’s also blaming his ex partner for his infidelities! Typical! She would t agree to get married even though we were engaged & that made me feel insecure. Jeez. She def won’t take him back after that (never was going to anyway by sounds of it).

I am continually staggered by how men risk EVERYTHING for casual sex with someone else. He is clearly regretting it now and has realised what he has lost - not just a wonderful woman but a home and a family unit too - but why can they not think ahead? It's incredible! It's like a disease on MN. These poor women blindsided by men who have affairs then shit themselves when their wives kick them out. Men need to sort themselves out.