So am I over reacting here or does my boyfriend need to be a bit more respectful? I feel like he has no respect for me, whenever I ask him to do something he doesn't do it most of the time and when I mention he hasn't done it he just tells me I'm moaning. This morning our daughter poo'd on the bed and it leaked through her nappy and some went on the bed. I stripped the sheet and put the duvet back on the bed folded with the dirty bit folded up and gave it a quick wipe (I had to get ready for work) so left it like that to sort later and just told him not to put our daughter or anything on the duvet until I had a chance to clean it, so what did he do but put her clothes and milk cup on top of the duvet so I mentioned I told him not to and then he went and put his phone right on top of where she had poo'd so again I told him he'd put his phone right on top of it. He stated aggressively pointing down saying 'oh it's right there is it' in a really aggressive voice and I said there was no need to be nasty and he said all I've done this morning is moan so I said it's because you didn't listen to me, the one thing I said was not to put anything on the bit that's unclean.
The other Sunday I had to go out and I phoned him because I was taking longer than I thought and told him to just put the washing on dry that was already in the machine, I get home and he hadn't done it. Our daughter was upstairs napping and he was on the PS4 and said 'sorry I forgot' basically he couldn't be bothered to pause and walk a couple of feet put it on dry.
My car is always dirty because he leaves rubbish in it when he uses it (I leave my own but also have a bin bag in the footwell to put it in) but I can't take it to get cleaned because he says if he take it to a car wash he won't clean it himself again or fix any 'scratches' they cause so I have to wait until he has time to clean my car which isn't often. I could do it myself but with a one year old I really don't find the time..
It's only since September he's actually got a proper job and started making money.. he decided to open his own business (which caused a lot of issues as it wasn't actually his business) and he didn't make money for at least eight months which meant my mum was paying our bills whilst I was on maternity.. he finally gave it up and got a job when I'd had enough and went to his dad after he wouldn't listen to me so his dad told him if he doesn't sort out his shit, he will back me up if I leave him and tell him to get out..
He blames me for being late but has no sense of time and is known by his friends for being the late one long before we got together..
He makes up stories in his head of things that I've told him when I haven't like for example, we turned out airing cupboard into a clothes cupboard and instead of fixing the holes in the wall and painting it, he wanted to put ply wall up and plaster over it and when he got annoyed at doing it he said 'you are the one that wanted this done' I never even suggested it, I wouldn't know to ply a wall and plaster over it as I've never done DIY in my life?!
Another one was my mum had our daughter on the Sunday night of Easter bank holiday and he was under the impression that I was taking her to my mum on Sunday morning but I'd never said but he wouldn't let it go that I told I was dropping her off Sunday morning.. these were never the plans with my mum..
Sometimes it's just a question like 'have you messaged so and so about the part for the shower head' and I get told 'I've just got in, does it look like I've done it'
AIBU? I just feel like he doesn't listen to me ever, with anything. I mean these are just a few odd things but I don't feel respected at all. I love him but I find myself more often getting less and less tolerant of these aggressive outbursts as soon as I open my mouth..