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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Is 50 too old??

113 replies

NewRollover · 08/02/2023 13:32

I'm 50 years old - it feels like a big jump from 49 I am suddenly feeling closer to retirement and old age.

I have a chance to jump into a new career opportunity in a job I would have given my right arm for 20 years ago. I don't know if I feel too old and tired.

I'm working full time but this is longer full time and a slightly longer commute. It's more money, more responsibility, more challenge. Senior management in a growing business.

What would you do? AIBU to feel Iike this.

OP posts:
PurpleButterflyWings · 08/02/2023 16:35

@NewRollover I would only go for it if you actually really dislike the job that you're in now and if you really need the money. 'A fantastic opportunity' and 'a new career/great job' could actually mean a lot more responsibilities, longer days, and a lot more stress.

I'm in my mid 50s and I had a really stressful and demanding job for almost 20 years and swapped to a much more simple, less stressful job in my late 40s. It was less money, but it's less hours, and a LOT less stress and responsibilities!

I would never go back. I can just sign off at 2 o'clock in the afternoon when I finish. I am 10 minutes walk away too compared to 35 to 45 minutes in the car - (one to one and a half hours round trip,) depending on the traffic. Hardly any responsibilities either. I don't have to worry about anything else from 2.00 in the afternoon, until I start again the next day at 9.am.

Only YOU can decide what is best. As I said, ultimately, a 'better' job, that is higher ranking than you have now, will bring with it more work, more responsibilities, longer hours, (and as you said - a longer commute.)

And despite the cries from a few saying 'I have waaaay more energy in my mid 50s than I ever had in my 20s or 30s...' I find that utterly baffling. Because I don't understand why. The vast VAST majority of people would not have way more energy in their 50s than they had in their 20s. Such a bizarre comment. And this type of comment always pops up on these threads!!!

IsThereAPenOfIt · 08/02/2023 16:37

I'm nearly 50 and looking to change career, but I'm planning to go in at entry level. That way I'll have control over work-life balance if I climb the ladder. But I am lucky enough to have quite small outgoings.

PurpleButterflyWings · 08/02/2023 16:38

Even the vote thus far has two thirds of people saying YABU. Like, don't do it!!!

OneCup · 08/02/2023 16:38

What are you worried about? Failing the interview? Finding the job too difficult? Too tiring? Colleagues' perception of you?

Dibbydoos · 08/02/2023 16:42

Go for it. Who knows what fruits it'll bear!!!

I'm 56, self employed and doing fine. But come Oct I'll be a c suite in a company that has huge potential - it's all pretty much sorted. A few years growing that business will set me up for the rest of my life when I'll be principally retired, but as still keeping my hand in as an NED.

ForeverAnonymous · 08/02/2023 16:45

Age has got naff all to do with it. If you want to do it…just do it surely.

You’ve got nothing to lose.

Arniesleftleg · 08/02/2023 16:57

YANBU. Personally I wouldn't take it. At 52 my time is more important than money. I left my job in property at the start of the pandemic and set up a cleaning business. It pays more but I don't have any real responsibilities and thats just how I love it. I'm too tired and long in the tooth to be responsible for corporate stuff now. Good luck what ever you do.

Hoppinggreen · 08/02/2023 16:58

I started a fantastic new job 1 week before my 50th!

Hoppinggreen · 08/02/2023 16:59

Hoppinggreen · 08/02/2023 16:58

I started a fantastic new job 1 week before my 50th!

Posted too son.
I am working more hours than I have since I went in Mat leave 18 years ago. I’m coping fine and really enjoying it

newwings · 08/02/2023 17:05

50 is the new 40!! I'll be restarting my career at your age so go for it. I've worked with people in their 70's they were on the ball and lived very full active lives. Good luck!

UnshakenNeedsStirring · 08/02/2023 17:05

TwoLeftSocksWithHoles · 08/02/2023 13:52

50 is too old is you are a cat but not if you are a Galapagos giant tortoise.

Hope this helps. 😉

Haha you made me laugh

Blossomtoes · 08/02/2023 17:06

I started a whole new career when I was 54, moved from a permanent job to contracting. It meant no job security, paid holiday, sick pay or employers pension contributions. It also meant constant change, massive mental stimulus and meeting and working with an enormous range of people. And a lot more money. It was absolutely the best thing I’ve ever done.

theleafandnotthetree · 08/02/2023 17:06

Hoppinggreen · 08/02/2023 16:59

Posted too son.
I am working more hours than I have since I went in Mat leave 18 years ago. I’m coping fine and really enjoying it

Show quote history

But the OP may well have worked full time for 30 years, very different to having worked part time or being a stay at home mum for chunks of time. I know because I am one of those people. I have a bit more enthusiasm and juice in me because I am not as worn out by commuting, travel, corporate bullshit, etc. And even I at 49 would be wary of taking a job where my quality of life overall declined.

flabbygoldfish · 08/02/2023 17:07

Never too old. Most US presidents are over 70, many prime ministers are 50+. And the way things are going you maybe working for another 10 - 20 years before retirement so make the most of it.

p.s. a man would take the job without a second thought

Ponoka7 · 08/02/2023 17:14

I'd be aiming for good work/life balance with enough money to live on. As a pp said, it gets tougher to fit in hobbies and you don't know what your health will be like in your 60's. Do you have enough money for a cleaner etc? You could end up just absolutely knackered. Are your friends starting to retire/slow down? I've retired at 54, but I'm planning on doing some part time work in around five years, when my DD will no longer need me for childcare. I'm not wasting what good health I might have slogging my guts out. Are you fully through the menopause?

Ponoka7 · 08/02/2023 17:16

"p.s. a man would take the job without a second thought"

Not necessarily. You start to want hobbies. Many men are starting to have heart/blood pressure issues. It tends to be how far into your mortgage etc that influences the decision.

Rainbowlights · 08/02/2023 17:32

Age is just a number, go for it. I’m 50 and have just went back to full time education 😁

Abra1t · 08/02/2023 17:36

I realized just after Covid when my career seemed to be coming to an involuntary end, that it really mattered to me that I carried on. I'm 59 now and have been given another chance and I'm making my work my top priority again, at least for now. A kind of twilight retirement made me feel really low, especially when my covid clinic volunteering ended.

topcat2014 · 08/02/2023 17:39

I changed job at 49, I'm 51 now, and love it. I feel 10 years younger than my old job where I was getting stale.

Too soon to "wind down"!

Isithotinhere · 08/02/2023 17:45

You'll have a better pension anday be able to retire earlier, that would swing it for me - I went for a higher public sector grade role at 48, will be able to retire at 60 rather than 65.

And they obviously think you're able for the role, so trust them.

Hollywolly1 · 08/02/2023 18:17

Op most poster's here are getting caught up with the age 50 thing, folks it's not about her age I'm sure she flying it, it's more about the longer hours and the longer commute and more responsibility on too of all that. It could be great for a while but when the initial excitement wears off you could be wishing for your old life back.......grass looking greener on the other side and all that.........

Barnowl25 · 08/02/2023 18:27

I'm 63 and just been offered a promotion in my dream job. I skip to work every day. Grab the opportunity with both hands and help show the world us older women have a lot to offer.

Passmeaplacard · 08/02/2023 18:45

You get one life, just go for it! If you decide it’s not for you then at least you tried, better than regretting things

WhoNeedsSleepNotISaidMyBody · 08/02/2023 18:48

@NewRollover I found turning 50 a bit crap too.

Ibhave health issues holding me back, but if you don't then I'd go for it, enjoy the challenge & the money! In my situation id out the extra into my pension.

I'm 53, I have the aforementioned health issues and crippling brain FOG, not sure if that's part of my health issues or menopause, but I can't focus, retain information or think straight.

I will be made redundant next year & have no idea what I'm going to do. I won't get another job like the one I have, they're like Golden Hens Teeth where I am and I can't afford to buy a house where the jobs are.

I had intended on renting my house & renting where the work is, but since the Govt has decided to make that virtually impossible now, I have NO idea what I'm going to do!

So my perspective is 'Give it a go'. Make your commute as comfortable & enjoyable as you can and make any home adjustments that'll help it work (cleaner, outsourcing ironing etc).

bulk up your pension.

but only you know what you want to do & whether you'd regret not giving it a go or leaving your current job to give it a go.

I only regret the things I didn't do!!

good luck whatever you decide!!

Oblomov23 · 08/02/2023 18:57

I would take it. Wouldn't give it a second thought. Why would you not?

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