AIBU - parenting with Ex

[mzpsmummy]

First hearing ex claimed he did not receive my C7 and was unaware of any abuse. I was instructed to make a witness statement as well as a scotts schedule. I’ve sent both over. DRA is in March. I have also proposed in my position statement for the DRA if he is to admit to the abuse, do a DV course I am happy for contact to start at a contact centre and we build it up gradually, I’m willing to pay 50% of the costs for the contact centre.

I stopped contact in September as police had safeguarding concerns. I originally went to report threats of revenge porn from which they picked up on coercive control and rape. Both NFA. A non molestation order granted in Jan too.From early December i was sending videos and pictures to ex’s mum (my child’s grandmother) and this was continually as Cafcass said to simply continue this at FHDRA which I was happy to do. His mother has suddenly blocked me? I don’t message her at all, just send the videos and pictures every 3-4 days. I sent a message to c’s grandfather saying I think I may be blocked, if this is also blocked I will respect that you don’t wish to see these updates and will not send them.

I have some concerns here though. A few weeks back I sent a message to c’s grandmother on c’s birthday “you are free to communicate with me regarding c’s wellbeing / anything you’d like to know I’m a text away” no response or to any pics etc too.

I’m worried now in court, he will say my mother had to block you as it was too much to see videos and pictures of the grandchild she doesn’t see. I’m also worried he’s made her block me so I have no choice but to communicate with him and the 3rd party of choice was her. What if he says I’m harassing them with pictures and videos now that I’ve sent via grandad?
I’m worried about looking stupid in court doing all when they’ve blanked me / stonewalled essentially.
Would someone be able to advise me on wether I should keep sending the pictures or just give up.

As a parent I’d be looking at those updates feeling happy my child is happy well fed & makes cards for me! An ex who despite all that abuse is willing to offer contact centre and build up and posts the cards out! I’d be using my mothers communication with my ex as a tool to ask the well-being of my child!

AIBU here or is my ex taking the p here?

I have no direct experience but common sense says a judge will not see anything negative in your behaviour if it was agreed you sent the pictures then you were blocked. Stop sending them and await further professional (not the ex) direction but basically do nothing

As above. Wait for clear legal.advice or a new number from the third party. Do nothing in the time being, you've acted reasonably.

@Temporaryname158 thank you! Yes Cafcass ordered to continue sending pictures. I will stop now as it's not clear wether or not they'd like for this to continue.

I sure hope a judge sees through it and I'm given my peace back. Trying to do what's best for your child all while healing from your worst nightmare is the worst thing I've ever had to do. Just trying my best.

@Conkersinautumn thank you! I appreciate that. I've been full of anxiety wondering what I've done wrong here? I suppose it is best to just wait for better direct legal advice.

I think I would take screen shots showing the pics aren’t going through, to prove you sent them and perhaps even continue to send them to the blocked number. You cannot then be held responsible if a new number was not provided

@Temporaryname158 I approached the child's grandfather and said I believe I may be blocked, I sent the video of our child posting a card to his dad, I mentioned if there's no response / this is blocked I will respect that you do not wish to see these updates.

I will not send anything else to the grandad as I'm very likely not to receive a response at all which no other words means they don't care.

It worries me a lot that they have open communication with me yet fail to ever ask how the child is? If he's been well / sleeping etc? Not a care in the world.