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AIBU?

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Original poster

What age did you stop bedtime stories?

138 replies

AmIreallyBeverly · 07/02/2023 12:58

We've always read a bedtime story. My daughter will be 13 this year and I still read her a chapter or two of a book before bed. It's very much led by her and she's started occassionally saying she doesn't want me to read. That's fine but I'll miss it when she no longer wants it at all. I won't necessarily miss the books though - she likes some nonsense!

What age did you stop?

OP posts:
chronictonic · 07/02/2023 22:12

Feels like we're reading more than ever to our DD9 at bedtime as she stays up later - so we all go to bed, she and DH have a series they are into together.. then we all read our own books for while.. then I often read her something when we turf her back into her own bed!
We're really enjoying it and tryinf to make the most whilst she still wants to

Hankunamatata · 07/02/2023 22:14

About 9. They discovered audio books who read much better than mum or dad

Snowpaw · 07/02/2023 22:15

I remember being quite old and my Mum reading me and my sister (who was 3 years older than me) a story every night. I loved it. She read us all sorts of things. I think I was probably well into high school when it stopped. I hope to do it with my DD as long as she wants.

LostinSpacialAwareness · 07/02/2023 22:15

Mine is 12 & listens to an audio book for 15 minutes while lying in bed. Also listens to audio books while drawing, showering, playing games, tidying room etc etc etc. They have a little portable speaker & it just moves around the house with them. Kind of like how I was permanently plugged into my walkman at that age.

Spongecake556 · 07/02/2023 22:19

SafferUpNorth · 07/02/2023 13:27

My DS (14) loves reading at bedtime... me reading to him gradullay morphed into him reading to me while at primary school, and now we both read our own books but together, in his bed, before lights out. 15 mins or so every night. Very relaxing quality time together.

Love this

I’ve always said I’ll stop when they want me to. Hope it’s not for many years to come as it’s not just reading- they seem to open up at bedtime and talk about stuff (probably cause they know it’s close to lights out and they’re trying to postpone it!)

Stompythedinosaur · 07/02/2023 22:32

I still read to my 10 and 11yos. I have been wondering if they would ask me to stop, but they haven't yet, and I love it.

SirSamVimesCityWatch · 07/02/2023 22:51

This is lovely! I read to 8yo DD every night but I was definitely reading on my own at that point (I'm like a pp's child up thread, I hate being read to, have done since I was in primary school - it's too slow) so I wasn't sure when DD would want me to drop it. Hopefully I've got years left because I love it.

Curiouscucumber · 07/02/2023 23:32

Oh I love this. I was worried that I still read to ds who is nearly 11 and whether I should force it to stop but I love it..I shall carry on with both DC until they want me to stop

Ivesaidenough · 08/02/2023 00:39

We liked the Secret Breaker books because of the puzzle solving. Might be a bit young for her, but my son liked them at 12 because they were fairly easy reading.

Newmumatlast · 08/02/2023 00:51

BabyOnBoard90 · 07/02/2023 13:29

Very very surprised at the responses, not what I expected.

But great people are able to find that bonding time

Same. I read to myself from primary age bar reading books. Bedtime stories were for when I was really little. But I love this.

kateandme · 08/02/2023 03:37

the more i grow up the more i realise by experience and what ive seen is how essential,whatever you do that bedtime time is for kids and their parents.

Johnisafckface · 08/02/2023 05:25

My dd was never really interested. So it stopped around age 2 or 3. I was fine with it as I hate reading aloud.

Aethelred · 08/02/2023 08:19

I still read to mine at 7 and 12.

Rosio · 08/02/2023 08:25

HappierTimesAhead · 07/02/2023 14:35

This thread has made me smile. My two are still little and sometimes I wish for storytime to be over so I can get some downtime but this is a reminder to cherish it as it won't last forever. 😍

Same! I read a story to my 4 yo last night but some nights if I’m tired and he doesn’t ask I put his music on and say goodnight with no story as I just want to chill myself. But this has made me think twice and just tell the story as one day he’ll be too old for it

celticprincess · 08/02/2023 08:30

Can’t recall but it must have been quite young as mine are 10 and 13. Youngest has been reading to herself since quite young though. Then they quite liked Alexa reading to them as well. The secondary school hBe made a huge issue out of reading every day and having parents sign a log so we did start doing a family reading session each evening when we could fit it on. But all reading our own books silently.

Greendoorsaremyfavourite · 08/02/2023 08:34

DH reads to our 8yr old every night and will carry on until ds wants it to stop. They both love it and its a big bonding thing for them.

shockedballoon · 08/02/2023 08:40

Still reading with my DS(13). Not every night as sometimes it gets late due to scouts or he has to finish homework he 'forgot' or something. He still loves it though- and he reads something else himself afterwards.

As he loves dystopia YA fiction I very much enjoy reading to him still as well - we're currently on the second book Of Michael Grant's 'Gone' series.

Also sometimes we don't read and just have a chat & a cuddle.

mdh2020 · 08/02/2023 08:53

When bedtime reading petered out we still maintained early morning reading during school holidays - Wind in the Willows and Lord of the Flies - I remember. The last book I read to my DC was To Kill a Mockingbird so they must have been quite old.

BuntyMcHooves · 08/02/2023 09:07

I’m still reading to DS (13) and DD (10) although DD will more often say she wants to read to herself - she tends to have a home reading book from the library, a school reading book and the book I am reading to her so it depends how into each book she is.
I asked DS’s English teacher when he started secondary and she said keep doing it as long as he’ll let you! He likes the one to one time and is mildly dyslexic and I think he takes in the story better when it’s read to him.

Wishiwasatsoftplay · 08/02/2023 10:12

AmIreallyBeverly · 07/02/2023 14:06

My parents never read to me.

She has always been a voracious reader. We can't keep up with her book and audio book demands! 🤣 As for walking past a book shop without stopping... hahaha!

She's not really interested in Harry Potter but has read the script book. We've read all the Narnia books. I didn't realise how religious they were as a child.

CSLewis was a prof of medieval history- so they (narnia books) are built around lots of medieval church concepts too- fascinating!
what about some biographies?
and we found this quotes useful:www.booktrust.org.uk/booklists/s/suggested-reading-for-year-7--year-8-autumn-term/
terry pratchet if she has a cynical sense of humour - found some went over his head, but had some great discussions about poverty/politics etc

BabyTa · 08/02/2023 11:59

As soon as they are a confident reader I would say. 13 seems really old and I'm surprised she hasn't wanted to read herself but then not all kids like reading books. I would have said 6 or 7 otherwise.

redskydelight · 08/02/2023 12:16

BabyTa · 08/02/2023 11:59

As soon as they are a confident reader I would say. 13 seems really old and I'm surprised she hasn't wanted to read herself but then not all kids like reading books. I would have said 6 or 7 otherwise.

It's not really to do with not wanting to read books themselves. It's to do with having a shared moment with a parent. It was quite common for me to read a chapter to my DC and then for them to read ahead by themselves (which is annoying when you have no clue what is going on because you only read chapters 2, 7 and 13).

The great thing about reading a book with your older child is that you can then talk about it - children don't necessarily read books with the same understanding as an adult and it can be fascinating to share opinions.

Otherwise just the act of sitting quietly with your child sometimes prompts a discussion about something entirely unconnected to the book. For us, bedtime reading was as much about the 1:1 interrupted time as it was about actually reading. Of course you can do this in other ways but this is a less pressurised way than the "tell me about your day" type conversations.

evtheria · 08/02/2023 12:35

@redskydelight Agreed.
I actually dislike reading aloud but also hate listening to books being read (can't do Audible etc) because I start daydreaming.
But I find the bedtime reading moment is a good way for both DS and I to hang out without distractions, and often leads to small chat where he might reveal a worry or something he's upset about... He enjoys the intimacy and I manage to turn off the other 20 To Dos in my head and just focus.

MrsBartlet · 08/02/2023 12:48

We read to ds until he was 13 and dd until she was 15, although by then it wasn't every day as homework/life etc got in the way. Both were able readers with dd going on to study English at Cambridge, a fact that is not unconnected to the amount we read to her! Not saying this to show off but to say carrying on reading to your children is very worthwhile. None of the reading was done to hothouse her, we were merely sharing our passion for books - dh and I used to have a bookshop and both work in publishing now.

Research shows that many parents stop reading to their children once the children can read to themselves. Children who continue to be read to are much more likely to read for pleasure independently as well. As well as missing out on the bonding time, you can read books beyond what they would manage to read to themselves which can only be a good thing.

Article from the Guardian linking to research on this -

www.theguardian.com/books/2019/mar/04/give-older-children-story-time-to-halt-fall-in-young-readers-urge-experts#:~:text=Most%20parents%20stop%20reading%20to,%25%2C%20compared%20with%2024%25.

Return2thebasic · 08/02/2023 15:14

To ask everyone who's able to keep it going well into teen years: what if your DC want to jump ahead of the story that you are reading at 15 minutes/day rate? Would you let them read the book ahead and then carry on reading from where you left behind the night before? Or you start from where they stopped reading themselves?

I thought that was the biggest hurdle back then when we decided call it off, as DS didn't want to be read to in a slower pace than he could do himself.