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AIBU?

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Original poster

To not do food for party

371 replies

ttctimeforme · 06/02/2023 18:54

If you went to an party in the evening at a venue, around 7:30pm onwards.. would you expect food to be provided?

OP posts:
MarshaMelrose · 06/02/2023 20:46

Don't pay for caterers. People are really easily pleased that you've given them something. A couple of nice puddings to finish.

Dunnoburt · 06/02/2023 20:52

Surprise party 2 days ago, started at 7.30pm.....full buffet provided..I'd have been annoyed if it wasn't as I drove 3 hours to get there!......I'd go with savoury more than sweet but that's just my personal taste.....any local chippies you can approach to deliver?

OhClunge · 06/02/2023 20:53

Could you do an American supper sort of thing , where everyone brings a small dish of something ?
Guests may feel more involved in the surprise party and there will be lots of different food to eat
Sorry if it's previously been suggested I've only read your posts @ttctimeforme

BelleMarionette · 06/02/2023 20:55

Yes, absolutely, you need to feed guests. It doesn't need to be anything fancy, but it would be rude not too, plus alcohol on empty stomachs wouldn't go well. Don't forget to provide veggie and vegan options too.

I will always remember the parties were no/next to no food was provided, and not for good reasons. It shows a real lack of care towards your guests.

Katjolo · 06/02/2023 20:55

Always

Wife2b · 06/02/2023 20:56

Absolutely, what’s a party without food? Cake is the best bit even as an adult 🤣

Chocbuttonsandredwine · 06/02/2023 20:57

Genuinely at that time of night people would much prefer pizza than sandwiches/cheese that’s been out for hours.

Doing something is better than nothing… if they don’t like pizza then it’s tough:

Nanny0gg · 06/02/2023 20:59

ttctimeforme · 06/02/2023 19:16

It's not a big party, just something small with 30-40 close friends and family

No caterers that I can find on google really in this area unfortunately

I had a look at getting the sandwiches from m&s and they had wraps etc too but then sandwiches and wraps aren't enough either on their own are they..

The pizza idea could work but would this look a bit naff I'm not sure?

I don't know when I'll be able to get to the party to set up either

If I manage to pull this party off without getting caught out I'll be amazed 😅

Could you get a food van to come along?

FelicityFlops · 06/02/2023 21:01

19:30 is an odd time to hold a party. Either it is a dinner party, so food served from about 20:00 or it is the "tail end" of early evening drinks, where people are expected to "bugger off" after 30 minutes of small talk.
Depends on how the invitation is worded, I suppose.
I would say, for drinks:
Felicity is at home on xx from 18
For dinner:
Felicity invites you to dinner on xx 19:30 for 20:00

Confusion101 · 06/02/2023 21:01

DuplicateUserName · 06/02/2023 19:31

Ok, I'm not sure what the eye rolling emoji is for.

I'm just trying to assertion exactly what you're providing the guests with (as an aside, I'm Irish and the majority of parties will have at least a certain amount money put behind the bar by the hosts).

So if you're not providing guests with drinks, I'd say you definitely need to provide them with a bit of food, and not just sweet stuff.

Show quote history

What Irish parties do you go to and can I come? I've never been to a party here that had that. At most a free round for the house! That was all

Kennykenkencat · 06/02/2023 21:03

I would get a boxes of mixed crackers, about 8 -10 baguettes and small soft rolls,
a couple of tubs of spreadable butter and a range of different cheeses (around 10lb-15lb in weight and large Costco type pots of hummus
cheeses on a large platter with bags of salad and a couple of large jars of olives.

You will be surprised at what people get through. Last party I did for about 30 I only had a few bits of cheese and olives left and they had got through nearly all of the bread and crackers I had put out as well as the 12 large pizzas I ordered for later on in the evening.

thinkfast · 06/02/2023 21:05

Yes I'd expect proper food at a party at that time of day. I wouldn't stay long if there were only donuts and cakes.

If there's a pizza place nearby, I'd order a delivery so that everyone can have some slices.
If not, can you order some platters or party food? There's a place near me that does wonderful home made giant quiches and frittatas. Each one serves about 20. Couple of those with some special salads would be lovely. Roast sweet potatoe, spinach and feta salad. That type of thing.

NancyJoan · 06/02/2023 21:05

Yes, I would expect some food, and a drink provided on arrival. If you have time to lay out doughnuts, cakes and desserts, you have time to do bread/cheese/meats/pickles etc. plus crisps/breadsticks, and could do a plate of brownies and a sliced lemon cake for those who want sweet food.

Makingupfactstosuitmyagenda · 06/02/2023 21:12

I’ve been to at least three weddings as an evening guest at that time and there has been no food. Not a free bar or even a free drink. One I even got a wedding gift thank you card one year later, saying you came you ate, we drank, we celebrated, thanks for the gift! Felt like sending it back corrected and asking for the gift back.

it always make sense to provide food but you wouldn’t be the first host not to.

Johnnysgirl · 06/02/2023 21:15

Makingupfactstosuitmyagenda · 06/02/2023 21:12

I’ve been to at least three weddings as an evening guest at that time and there has been no food. Not a free bar or even a free drink. One I even got a wedding gift thank you card one year later, saying you came you ate, we drank, we celebrated, thanks for the gift! Felt like sending it back corrected and asking for the gift back.

it always make sense to provide food but you wouldn’t be the first host not to.

You came, you ate, we drank?? 🤣🤣🤣
Even if you'd feasted like kings that's an extraordinarily wanky thank you card.

TaRaDeBumDeAy · 06/02/2023 21:16

ttctimeforme · 06/02/2023 18:57

I was thinking of just doing some sweet food, cakes, doughnuts etc

Would that be sufficient?

It's not about budget it's because it's a surprise party it will be very difficult to arrange food and the venue doesn't offer it

Order in pizzas if you have to, but you have to feed people.

Wiluli · 06/02/2023 21:18

Yes of course . Unless you are under 21 and you are getting drunk before going out lol

Ladybrrrd · 06/02/2023 21:19

I hosted a party for 35 in v similar circumstances. Pizza was v well recieved, plus some chicken strips and wedges. Just bear in mind vegan/gluten free etc, which is still usually doable with pizza!

tillytoodles1 · 06/02/2023 21:23

Yes.

fruitbrewhaha · 06/02/2023 21:23

RemusLupinsBiggestGroupie · 06/02/2023 19:49

@DuplicateUserName We will have to agree to disagree. I've never been to an event in a venue that provided a free bar. We clearly move in different circles.

Then you’re missing out. I’ve been to plenty of weddings, 30th, 40th and now 50th party with paid bar. I’m fact my 21st had a paid bar.

BelleMarionette · 06/02/2023 21:25

I just saw that the OP wasn't planning on providing drinks either. How will you host the guests? Better to not do a party

Blueink · 06/02/2023 21:25

Party food eg from M&S ie sandwich/wraps/rolls alongside sweet stuff/cakes like you said before is perfect and keeps it simple

Sunsetintheeast · 06/02/2023 21:26

RemusLupinsBiggestGroupie · 06/02/2023 19:31

Why on earth should it be? Silly and irrelevant question imo.

Show quote history

Well our last party was a free cocktail bar and a beer bar. Plenty of people do provide a free bar, but without food, expect a messy night.

fruitbrewhaha · 06/02/2023 21:28

caringcarer · 06/02/2023 20:13

You can buy tubs of precooked sausages, buy 10 scotch eggs and just cut them in halves, it takes about 5 seconds to pop open a packet of pringles. Same with crisps, tip into a bowl. Buy the M&S wraps and a couple of platters of sandwiches. Chocolate fingers can be just tipped on to a paper plate. Turkey dippers and chicken nuggets need cooking but can you get someone else to do that? A few bags of salad leaves and a couple of tubs of cherry tomatoes. Slice up a few cold quiches. Should all be done in 10-15 mins and use paper plates so no washing up.

Hmmmm maybe not though.

Cheese boards, nice bread, charcuterie, good dips, quality crisps, nuts, grapes. Not chicken nuggets.

Johnnysgirl · 06/02/2023 21:29

A free bar is a perfectly normal thing. Most people have encountered the odd one along the way, surely?
What I can't understand is why anyone would provide neither drink nor food but still call it a party.