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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Being told to work from home when sick

19 replies

bubble55 · 05/02/2023 17:08

I am 5 months pregnant with sciatica. It is so painful it reduced me to tears yesterday and could barely move. I’ve managed to move a little today but still in a lot of pain. My manager asked me how I’m doing and suggested I work from home this week from bed if I can’t come in. I am in a lot of pain and don’t really want to be working from home as it’s no different to sitting at my desk which is extremely uncomfortable! What do I even say back to this? AIBU?

My manager has a thing about sickness and makes a point that she never has a day off sick.

OP posts:

Boneweary · 05/02/2023 17:09

Sciatica is awful, back pain is exhausting apart from anything else. It’s rubbish but you do just have to reiterate you’re in too much pain to work.

Bankofrave · 05/02/2023 17:10

Just reply no sorry I’m not well enough to work so I shall self certify for the week then see how I am and visit the doctor if needs be.

Bonbon21 · 05/02/2023 17:11

Bully for her!
If you are in pain/off sick you are not fit to work. She needs to respect/accept that.

BigChesterDraws · 05/02/2023 17:11

Just call in sick. You can self-certify for a week.

RandomMess · 05/02/2023 17:12

Tell you can't because the pain killers you have to take are making you spaced out.

I would highly recommend going to see an osteopath that is qualified to treat pregnant women, they really helped me with sciatic and pelvic girdle pain

FavouriteSlippers · 05/02/2023 17:12

Just call in sick. Say sorry im in too much pain to concentrate

Tiani4 · 05/02/2023 17:13

If you are in too much pain to work then you sign yourself off sick for first 5 days and ask GP to sign you off after then. Legally you cannot work when signed off sick

Sorry for you as sciatica is awful and you'll need some meds from GP if ibuprofen and paracetamol aren't touching it.

What your manager thinks about it is irrelevant as if you can't work you can't work

Really no one should be working from their bed even if wfh when they are in acute pain

Tiani4 · 05/02/2023 17:13

Also leaning over a laptop from bed is worse for your spine than sitting at a desk properly with work station assessment

Mrsherdwick · 05/02/2023 17:21

Who is voting YABU? Obviously people who have never had sciatica!!! If you’re sick you’re sick. End of.
Take care xxx

Lolloped · 05/02/2023 17:22

Just in case it affects you, it’s worth considering that if you don’t get paid or receive less in your qualifying weeks for SMP you might lose income. Maybe she is trying to avoid this for you. But if you are in pain in bed YANBU to call in sick and not do any work.

MajorCarolDanvers · 05/02/2023 17:22

Call in sick and self certify.

custardbear · 05/02/2023 17:24

Benefit of the doubt it may be they're unaware of how painful it is. Just call in sick and do seek help from a physio or osteo specialising in pregnancy issues

Unikeko · 05/02/2023 17:27

Get a new DSE assessment when you return to work. We've purchased specialist chairs and desks for people with back pain.

I hope you feel better soon.

SmudgeButt · 05/02/2023 17:41

Def don't work if you are sick. Tell your bully manager that you've been told not to sit at a desk, not to work with a laptop on your lap, not to work in bed.

I used to help manage workplace adjustments and some managers were an absolute nightmare with no empathy for those who were sick, ill, injured. If they want you to WFH then they should be providing suitable kit - including a decent office chair, desk, full monitor and suitable keyboard because sitting on a sofa (or in bed) using a laptop on a laptray will only make your back worse. To be very specific - you need the right kit both at work and at home.

Mention that you want to ensure you recover so you can come back to work, that you don't want to do anything that will get you signed off long term.

PinkFrogss · 05/02/2023 18:04

Just tell her you’re too unwell to work, you can self certify for 7 calendar days and then you’ll need a fit note from your GP.

You’re still a way off this, but just to let you know if you’re off sick with pregnancy related sickness in the last 4 weeks before your due date your employer may begin your maternity leave early.

PlaitBilledDuckyPuss · 05/02/2023 18:09

Phone in sick.

One thing I have learned in nearly 30 years of work is that you get no thanks for forcing yourself to work when you are unwell. You might think you'll be seen as a 'trooper' or whatever, but no one actually gives a fuck.

JustDanceAddict · 05/02/2023 18:12

If you’re ill you should call in sick and that’s it esp if you’re in pain.
I was on a Teams call with someone in their sick bed and it was really wtf - they should not have online!! Thry we’re a senior person so their call, but it’s a double edged sword.

rwalker · 05/02/2023 18:15

If your too sick to work then go off sick

Maybe she was trying to be helpful so you can avoid registering sick and the implications that come with it ( pay and sick record )

ThinWomansBrain · 05/02/2023 18:33

ask GP to sign you off after then. Legally you cannot work when signed off sick

Not true - sick notes, where you couldn't work, were replaced by fit notes about ten years ago - with a fit note, you can be off sick, or return to work when you feel ready - possibly to adjusted duties or part time working, or indeed, mote commonly WHF these days.

That doesn't alter OP's situation, if you're sick and not able to work, then tell your manager - as PP has stated, working from a weird angle in bed is likely to do more damage/prolong your inability to work than at a properly assessed work station.

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