AIBU to stop neighbours from using the steps at the side of my house as shortcut?

[thelongroad]

I genuinely can't decide whether saying something would be unreasonable or not.
Our house (blue) is next to the corner house (red). There is a new build next to us, consisting of 2 semis. The one right next to us is still empty, but just before Xmas a family moved into the other one (pink).

All the houses along our road have the front entrance along the front road, but can also be accessed from the back road (we have no garden, only parking spots for the cars). Neither the front nor the back are fenced off. Front road is a dead end, so nobody going past. Back road has occasional cars and kids walking to local school but otherwise nothing (rural village).

We own the bit between us and corner house (their land is fenced off all round). It's sloping downwards towards the back, and we've paved it and put in steps (grey lines) so we can walk from front to back of house. I've also got plants growing there and we have our firewood stack on the side.

Very occasionally kids who are playing on either road use our steps as a shortcut to the other road. This is ok. We've also had workmen ask to use it when they've been working on one road and needed to get to the other. Also fine.

However, since the new neighbours moved in, they have been using it ALL THE TIME for getting from the front to the back. They have a garage at the front of the house but park their 2nd car at the back. Clearly they have no way of getting into their house at the back (we put in a back door specifically for this purpose) so they using our steps to cut through instead of walking all the way around the corner house.

Now, the thing is that the steps go past our living/dining room, and I actually see them zipping past every time. If they look in they can see us too.

It's (irrationally?) annoying the fuck out of me that they seem to think they can just come onto my property because it's more convenient for them.
I've even blocked the bit a the front with a row of plant pots to make it slightly more obvious that it's not a public way, but they're still using it.

I can't decide if I'm being deeply unneighbourly and unreasonable in wanting them to stop using our steps. I know I can ask them to stop and they will have to (from a legal point of view) but should I? Why does this bother me so much??

Apologies that this is so long. I offer a diagram as compensation of you made it through!

I have a back door/patio door
It unlocks from the inside so I can use it to get into the garden and back in
But it doesn't lock from the outside (it's a burglar prevention thing apparently!)
So I couldn't walk up to the back door and unlock it and enter my house that way

They walk through your garden rather than walk round a corner? CFers.

Op is in Germany

Ah!
thanks postitpatty
didnt pick up on that

Just tell them there seems to be a misunderstanding the steps are our garden not public path

You are NOT being unreasonable.

I would not want the liability of someone using (potentially slippery) steps on my property. You need to nip this in the bud before they can claim any kind of legal presumption that it's a bona fide right of way.

How about a chain from your house to corner house's fence, with a No Tresspassing sign on hit? Cheaper and easier than a fence.

Or have a note delivered: "Hello; there appears to be some misunderstanding. The steps marked on the enclosed map are private property and not to be used to access back road. Please refrain from tress passing. Thank you."

Seriously, don't wait till one of them slips and breaks a leg and tries to hold you responsible.

You say you don’t want to say anything or get your dh to say anything? How come? Genuine question btw, not trying to be snarky.

That makes things clearer. No need to worry about rights of way then- that would only be the case if there was an easement specifically registered with the Grundbuchamt, or in very rare cases, such as if the only road access they had was across your ground. However, you should be extremely concerned about liability. Winterdienst is absolutely fierce in Germany - if you haven't properly cleared sidewalks of snow and ice by 7am and somebody slips you'll be liable. Crucially that includes on your own ground. (There's a very elaborate blog/Twitter by a lady in a wheelchair who doesn't want to put down gravel or sand on her property as it's bad for the wheelchair, and it's a constant battle with all kinds if bystanders.)

Also, you're being ridiculous being so British and coy. If these folks have only moved in a month ago, the obvious solution would be to knock on their door with a small pot of plants to welcome them, then raise the issue in passing. I recently moved to a small German village/town as well, and the direct neighbours go around before Christmas distributing homemade bakery to everybody. Another set of neighbours had half the neighborhood over for their "Richtfest" - when their builders had finished the basic construction including roof beams- and hosted us for a meal. With small village living in Germany you'll need to build relationships anyway.

Seriously, don't wait till one of them slips and breaks a leg and tries to hold you responsible

As the OP is in Germany, this is very important. Even if the person who breaks their leg doesn't hold the OP responsible the whole thing will be investigated if the neighbour appears in the hospital with a broken leg. "What happened?" "I tripped on the neighbour's steps" "OK, so that's a case for insurance" - it's a complicated system to do with the various health insurance bodies in Germany. In the event of an accident, they look to recoup the costs of the treatment from the insurance of the property owner.
You wouldn't even need the neighbour to make a complaint or decide to sue.
Not like the NHS where the person would be treated and that would be paid for out of the NHS pot. The neighbour could then decide to sue later if there was long term damage.

As others have said YADNBU - it would actually freak me out having someone looking /walking by a window that's not meant to be accessible by people - privacy issues

@GrumpyPanda
Great post! I've also mentioned further upthread about liability in Germany and the right of way issue only applying if that's the only road access they have.
Hope the OP takes notes of our posts because the liability issue is very important.

Random neighbours using a shortcut across someone's property raise different issues in Germany than they would in the UK.

And as you also point out, OP shouldn't be so British and coy. Just go round and tell them to stop using the shortcut because it's on her property, and also get to know them a bit!

I would be highly annoyed too. Either gates, or in the meantime, could you put up a chain type of barrier, with a sign saying no entry.

Can you put a sign "private property no access"

I'm usually told I'm too nice op but this would annoy me

@thelongroad
That point made by a wise PP about liability for healthcare costs in Germany even though they were trespassers , may make you rethink the (preventative) costs of putting up a lockable gate to block off others using your property to take short cuts. Including the cf ndn

Fuck that

Definitely put a stop to it before it anyone can try to establish a right of way.

@GrumpyPanda @skippymcflippy
I've lived in Germany a very long time, and almost a decade in this particular place. It's nice that your village is so friendly, GrumpyPanda. This is not that type of village at all.

All the points about liability are valid though, I hadn't considered that really. I shall block the stairs immediately and put up a sign. Then look into fencing in the Spring.

Glad you will be protecting yourself. Please keep us posted!

I find it hard to understand why a gate at the start of the steps would be "super weird".

I have a passageway between my house and next doors. There is a fence inbetween and the gate attaches to my house and the fence. It's completely normal.

Also make sure when you get a gate it locks from both sides. Because otherwise the CFs may just start using it one way. Then you'll have a constantly banging gate to contend with as well as half the traffic.

If they ask about it I would point out the possibility of modifying their rear door, which if they are lazy would surely be a better option than having to take a detour round two houses and go down your steps.

I really don't understand why you just don't want to talk to them?

Despite saying they'd have to be thick as shot not to realise... stranger things have happened. Or perhaps they're just chancing it until you tell them to stop!m

Why don't you want to?

Please don't do anything passive aggressive (as often seems to happen when people can't just confront someone).

Just tell them it's your private property and not a right of way. It's fine to do that.

People never cease to amaze me. Just plain rude and lazy to do what they are doing. I would not tolerate it. I just don't understand how they don't realise what they are doing is inconsiderate! oh to win the lottery and be detached with a few acres and no neighbours :-)

As many others suggest, gates are the way to go. How inconvenient are they to you really? Easily unlocked, surely.

I would just speak to them and explain the situation. You can say you don't mind kids using it occasionally as a short cut but that this daily use by an entire family isn't something which works for you.