To expect a heads up?

[DelilahsHaven]

Would you worry, or be annoyed if your Dh persistently worked extremely late without letting you know?

Yesterday's example, I text him at 4pm to ask if he wanted anything from Tesco. Never replied. Rolled in at 10pm.

The night before he arrived home at 10.30pm.

He's contracted until 5pm, and I do understand that he has to work late often, it is usually around 8pm when he gets home.

I am not working at the moment as both our DCs have SENs and one us suffering very badly with school based anxiety following a breakdown last year.

Yesterday and the day before I was in tears before he left for work because of conflict with one of the DCs/worry about one DC health and some trauma of mine being triggered, which he was aware of.

Am I being unreasonable to expect a call or a text if he's going to be much later than 8pm?

Not being unreasonable at all, unless there was advance notice that it was going to be hectic that day and short staffed/loads of big meetings etc meaning you know they won't have their phone on them.

I had a very rare ranty shout this morning about it, and about his emotional/physical unavailability, but I don't think he sees it. It feels like he's checked out of our somewhat challenging home life.

I could understand it more if he was passionate about his work, but he's never stopped complaining about his job, across a number of different companies and roles, in twenty years of marriage.