to have perhaps had one party invite..............

10 replies

eleanorsmum · 07/02/2008 13:37

DD (3) started new pre-school last september and has yet to have had an invite to anyones party. this doesn't bother me (really) but there have been at least 6 in her class of 15 were nearly everyone else has gone. she didn't ask about ti at all until today when quite clearly the whole class is going to one little girls after school this pm. dd is very friendly i think with the partygirl. when i've been in to help she's played with her alot. just wondering really what i've (or dd!) has done to not get any invites yet! some of the group were in the mornings session together last summer but there have been others new to this group who have been invited.

god i sound like a spolied brat - i wanna go to the party - but just feel a little left out really for dd. wondering how she's going to be after school today when her friends go off to party. dd's bday is not till august so can't throw her a party and invite them all yet!

OP posts:

Sparkletastic · 07/02/2008 13:39

How about throwing a kiddy tea party just for the heck of it then you can suss the other mums out? See if they are in some weirdy clique or just socially inept!

hifi · 07/02/2008 13:52

there is a clique of alpha mums a dds nursery, they only invite each others children.
dd gets invited to the girls partys but not the boys.
how about having a word with the teacher and see if theres a problem.
its not nice to be left out, it will niggle you why.

VictorianSqualor · 07/02/2008 13:53

Have an Easter party, may help get you and DD known.
We had a halloween party partly because DD hadnt been at the school for her birthday the first year, and her birthday was on a weekend I was really busy this year so she just ahd one friend over, so we had a party for a different occasion.
It meant I got to know more of the mums and children and DD was more 'known' iyswim, remember the parenst are the ones doing invites at that age and they'll 'know' so many of the children, it's easy to forget some if they don't have any reason not to.

bozza · 07/02/2008 14:03

Is there a list of children that maybe your DD's name is missing from?

titchy · 07/02/2008 14:10

If others that are new have been invited and everyone else WITHOUT EXCEPTION is being invited then she must have been left off a list - check with playgroup leader and get her to amend the list pdq. If this is the case and you're feeling bold you could also ask one of the staff to have a quiet word with the party girl's mum!

titchy · 07/02/2008 14:14

again if you're bold how about asking the party girl's mum if she wants to come to tea/lunch on the party day. Then mum'll say oh she can't it's her party then be very embarrassed as your dd hasn't been invited and be coerced into inviting her

Original poster

eleanorsmum · 08/02/2008 07:44

Thanks for the tips. have discovered not everyone was invited, it just felt like it! DD is going to one in march - i'm quite friendly with his mum and he asked for dd apparently. but it still smarts a bit. dd was a bit upset when she relaised her good freinds were all going out tog and she had to come home with boring mummy. had to make up for it with a little treat.

arg the politics!

OP posts:

pulapula · 08/02/2008 09:54

My DD has been in nursery/pre-school for 2.5 years (she's now 3.1) and hasn't once been invited to anyone's party, but there again, we've never hosted a party either!

If you are bothered, then agree that you need to host a tea party or the like for a few of her friends.

cupsoftea · 08/02/2008 09:56

Could you invite someone round to play? or agree with asking the teacher.

Kitti · 08/02/2008 12:31

We've had various parties (Easter/Halloween) and had kids over constantly to play those first few years but didn't seem to help my kids get anymore invites which they then got upset about - the only thing I can think of (since the kids are always happy to come here) is the mums are put off by my two heads.... Seriously it is upsetting and it's very hard to socialise sometimes and birthdays in August make it even harder. You'll probably have to try and invite the odd one or two kids round for playdates just to get them friendly and see if that helps. There should be plenty of parties between now and August so if you think of something quick you might make the next birthday!! Then the next nightmare starts - do I have to stay or do I leave her - what sort of present to get - and when you get 30 invites and you have to cut down on numbers at the party in August ..... It's so much fun being a parent isn't it??

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