Son obsessing over food intake

[Ludoole]

My just turned 20 year old has decided he wants to eat meat, veg and fruit and nothing else.
Hes very strong ( works out nightly in his room and has a demanding job) but very lithe (not an ounce of fat on him).
I thought he was just being healthy which he may be. However today I commented about how I wished my tummy was as flat as his and he said I obviously see him differently to the way he sees himself.

I realise I may be worrying unnecessarily but he's perfect as he is , hes my baby boy.
I had an eating disorder when I was a teenager and i don't know if I'm over thinking. Am I?

Honestly, I would be worried. But I’m not sure how much you can do. I also had an eating disorder when I was younger and I had to hit rock bottom before I could come back

I can't even ensure he eats proper calorie amounts as he eats before I finish work.

You could try to get him to have a snack or glass of wine/beer with you when you come in from work?

I do think you're overthinking tbh if he is strong and wanting to eat healthily.

It's interesting that you say you were putting your own body down in front of him though. That's not a good move in front of kids... Although I appreciate he is an adult now.

He won't drink on a work day and says he's not hungry...

He's 20, you can't be monitoring his calorie intake 😵‍💫

I never mention anything about my body shape to him. I'm currently 12 stone. It was the comment that he sees himself differently to what everyone else sees that was my biggest concern.

You said to him that you wished your stomach was as flat as his.

Again, I know your son is not a child now. But poor body image in children can start by hearing their parents putting their own bodies down like that. Comparing, wishing for something different. It normalises not being content with your body.

I never mention anything about my body shape to him.
Yes you do! You just said you did.

It was a throwaway comment cuz he sometimes grabs my stomach and says he knows I've had 2 kids by that!

Any other time we are a body positive family!

he sometimes grabs my stomach and says he knows I've had 2 kids by that!

How disrespectful. I'd be telling him to stop that.

That's awful that he grabs your stomach! Wow!

Hes done it since he was 2. It's a running joke! Not disrespectful at all. Its a family joke.

But you letting it go on all this time is another sign of poor attitude towards body image in your family. You've told him it's fine to mock someone else's body because of extra weight since he was two.