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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

10 YEAR PARKING DISPUTE WITH NEIGHBOUR.

419 replies

eastafricanomad · 01/02/2023 17:23

Hi all,

I need some serious advice. I'm probably writing this in the heat of the moment so please ignore any theatrics. Let me break it down...

We've lived in this property for about 17 years. Our charming neighbour moved in on our tenth year. She is our attached neighbour on the right hand side. We all have allocated parking - what is the problem you ask?

See the thing is, we live in a cul-de-sac. Every house has an allocated parking spot and we have several visitor spots (families with multiple cars use these visitor spots as permanent parking spots and it doesn't appear to be an issue with anyone including me). My neighbour, has an allocated parking spot at the back of her house, but due to her mobility issues - she parks in front of her house on a public highway - again, no issues with this.

There is still space for another vehicle to be able to park directly parallel to her with no issues of blocking her car or her house. Yet she has proceeded to block off this empty potential parking space because she doesn't want anyone 'parking in front of her house' - bear in mind, this is a public highway. No one can reserve rights to a public highway.

Living in a cul-de-sac, naturally parking is tight despite the allocated spots we have. Households do sometimes have more than one vehicle and everyone else on the street is incredibly understanding.

However, this woman, has proceeded to put CONES! In an empty slot on the public highway, not reserving it for any reason as she has one car. No daily visitors - her sole reason is 'I don't want anyone parking in front of my house' (???) ITS A PUBLIC HIGHwaaaaay. Anyway.

Now that we are adding a vehicle to our household, this has only really started to irritate me now. We've ignored her a long time, DESPITE her harassing anyone that parks there. She has harassed my family, construction workers, delivery drivers - you name it! I'm at my wits ends. The straw that broke the camels back was this week, when we had a lovely gentleman come out from Hillary's to do measurements for my blinds. She left a note on his car and yelled at him when he left my property.

I've spoken to the local council, they have confirmed - no one can reserve rights to a public highway. I've spoken to the police, they have confirmed - this is illegal. I've sought legal advice, again - confirmed my perspective.

What on earth do I do with these cones? We work 7 days a week in my household, and coming home after a long shift, moving cones to park my car is proving tiresome! It's not even the inconvenience, its the AUDACITY!

Am I being unreasonable? What would you suggest? What would you do with these cones? I want to put them in my boot and dump them 500 miles from my house. Any advice on this issue would be helpful.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
5
Nightynightnight · 01/02/2023 17:45

Another one to say just keep moving the cones and putting them on her property so that you can't be accused of theft.

Quitelikeacatslife · 01/02/2023 17:45

Park in her allocated spot that she's not using

Mumsanetta · 01/02/2023 17:45

Easy - park there every single day and remove the cones or accidentally drive over them, every single day. If she comes out yelling, take your phone out to record her and then speak to your neighbourhood police officer about it - again, every single time. Complain about damage to your car caused by the cones.

L1ttledrummergirl · 01/02/2023 17:46

I'd buy a beat up, dented to fuck car/small van, tax it (to a friends address who lives miles away), insure it and park it there for a couple of months.

I'd go out periodically through the night(so they don't know it's me and turn it around just for giggles. I'd also deny all knowledge. A friend might do it for you.

MajorCarolDanvers · 01/02/2023 17:46

You need to be as assertive as she is.

Move the cones
Park
Ignore her
Repeat

Original poster
eastafricanomad · 01/02/2023 17:46

@Nightynightnight Can I be accused of theft if I remove objects obstructing a public highway? Grey area... I would consider it an act of service.

OP posts:
JudgeRudy · 01/02/2023 17:47

eastafricanomad · 01/02/2023 17:23

Hi all,

I need some serious advice. I'm probably writing this in the heat of the moment so please ignore any theatrics. Let me break it down...

We've lived in this property for about 17 years. Our charming neighbour moved in on our tenth year. She is our attached neighbour on the right hand side. We all have allocated parking - what is the problem you ask?

See the thing is, we live in a cul-de-sac. Every house has an allocated parking spot and we have several visitor spots (families with multiple cars use these visitor spots as permanent parking spots and it doesn't appear to be an issue with anyone including me). My neighbour, has an allocated parking spot at the back of her house, but due to her mobility issues - she parks in front of her house on a public highway - again, no issues with this.

There is still space for another vehicle to be able to park directly parallel to her with no issues of blocking her car or her house. Yet she has proceeded to block off this empty potential parking space because she doesn't want anyone 'parking in front of her house' - bear in mind, this is a public highway. No one can reserve rights to a public highway.

Living in a cul-de-sac, naturally parking is tight despite the allocated spots we have. Households do sometimes have more than one vehicle and everyone else on the street is incredibly understanding.

However, this woman, has proceeded to put CONES! In an empty slot on the public highway, not reserving it for any reason as she has one car. No daily visitors - her sole reason is 'I don't want anyone parking in front of my house' (???) ITS A PUBLIC HIGHwaaaaay. Anyway.

Now that we are adding a vehicle to our household, this has only really started to irritate me now. We've ignored her a long time, DESPITE her harassing anyone that parks there. She has harassed my family, construction workers, delivery drivers - you name it! I'm at my wits ends. The straw that broke the camels back was this week, when we had a lovely gentleman come out from Hillary's to do measurements for my blinds. She left a note on his car and yelled at him when he left my property.

I've spoken to the local council, they have confirmed - no one can reserve rights to a public highway. I've spoken to the police, they have confirmed - this is illegal. I've sought legal advice, again - confirmed my perspective.

What on earth do I do with these cones? We work 7 days a week in my household, and coming home after a long shift, moving cones to park my car is proving tiresome! It's not even the inconvenience, its the AUDACITY!

Am I being unreasonable? What would you suggest? What would you do with these cones? I want to put them in my boot and dump them 500 miles from my house. Any advice on this issue would be helpful.

You cannot reason with someone unreasonable. Speak to the decent neighbours and ask if they'll 'back you' on this plan.....you need to do prep to cover yourself.
Prep.... write a letter to all the neighbours saying that you have noticed that cones are being left out unlawfully. No one has actually claimed them, so you do not know for sure who they belong to.
DH comes home, cones in road. H removes and takes them home/puts in boot. You then hand them in to the Police/council (whoever deals with lost property in your area. Continue with the new replacements. Document with photos. When/if neighbours confronts you don't answer door but report a breach of the peace. If it persists inform Council as its interfering eith Highwsys...'Under the Highways Act 1980 it is an offence to obstruct the highway without permission from the local highway authority.' Eventually they'll get an asbo(or whatever its called).

Laiste · 01/02/2023 17:47

You can't be accused if she hasn't seen you ...... <taps nose>

Original poster
eastafricanomad · 01/02/2023 17:48

@Quitelikeacatslife I would do this, and it would save everyone the hassle but because she has left it unused and unattended for YEARS, someone else has now claimed the spot and I wouldn't want to disturb them :/

OP posts:
MzHz · 01/02/2023 17:48

The cones… you can’t take them/destroy them or you’ll be done for theft/Criminal damage

speaks from experience

remove them and put them on her property.
if she leaves a note, ignore it
if she shouts, ignore her and tell her that she doesn’t own the road and you’ll park wherever you’re legally allowed to.

as will deliveries, as will vans, as will friends and family.

if she continues with this behaviour, you’ll get her served with an asbo.

and do it.

people like this get away with things like this because nobody wants to confront them.

Laiste · 01/02/2023 17:49

JudgeRudy's suggestion IS the right thing to do.

MzHz · 01/02/2023 17:50

So launch the fucking cones into her garden. Every time.

see if you can get someone with a massive truck to drive over them

SunshineBoy · 01/02/2023 17:50

Look on your councils website for an email to report her with instead of calling.

You should openly go out several times and take photos of the cones to send.

even better, move them and when she comes to put them back take photos of her doing so. When she asks what you’re doing say the council asked for the pictures for the case they are building against her for illegally obstructing a highway.

convince a friend to come round a few days later with a clipboard to measure the space, take more pictures etc. if she comes out trying to talk to them get them to say “I can’t discuss an ongoing report with you Mrs Batshit, you’ll have to wait for someone to be in touch” if they use her name it’ll seem official maybe!

Sometimes a bully needs to be scared by someone bigger.

neverknowinglyunreasonable · 01/02/2023 17:50

My suggestion. Get someone local to do your blinds. In my experience that will give you enough money left over from your Hillary's quote to hire a skip. Put the skip outside your neighbours house and fill it with cones.

Laiste · 01/02/2023 17:51

Can you somehow fashion the squashed cones into a blind? ...

Mumsanetta · 01/02/2023 17:51

MzHz · 01/02/2023 17:48

The cones… you can’t take them/destroy them or you’ll be done for theft/Criminal damage

speaks from experience

remove them and put them on her property.
if she leaves a note, ignore it
if she shouts, ignore her and tell her that she doesn’t own the road and you’ll park wherever you’re legally allowed to.

as will deliveries, as will vans, as will friends and family.

if she continues with this behaviour, you’ll get her served with an asbo.

and do it.

people like this get away with things like this because nobody wants to confront them.

Yep! You must fight fire with fire!

TwoBlueFish · 01/02/2023 17:52

Is she fly tipping by leaving items on the public highway? I’d park my new car there and report any shouting or notes to the police as harassment.

Laiste · 01/02/2023 17:53

@MzHz · The cones… you can’t take them/destroy them or you’ll be done for theft/Criminal damage

speaks from experience

Come on ... do tell* *Smile

Iris1976 · 01/02/2023 17:53

I'd be setting up CCTV because she will probably damage car in retaliation.

Hoppinggreen · 01/02/2023 17:54

Laiste · 01/02/2023 17:37

Are they 'proper' traffic cones? The big heavy ones? If so i bet they're nicked - the ones you can buy are really light and pathetic.

Anyway - honestly - i'd be removing the cones at night not in the daylight when she could see and hiding them in my garage.

How much was your blind quote btw? I've heard they're painfully expensive.

I bought my blinds from Next
Orla Keily made to measure. £350 for 3 for my bay window

crew2022 · 01/02/2023 17:54

neverknowinglyunreasonable · 01/02/2023 17:50

My suggestion. Get someone local to do your blinds. In my experience that will give you enough money left over from your Hillary's quote to hire a skip. Put the skip outside your neighbours house and fill it with cones.

This

BasilParsley · 01/02/2023 17:55

Why has no-one demanded a diagram which is usually compulsory when it comes to parking posts? I need one in order to form a considered and balanced view ;)

sorrynotathome · 01/02/2023 17:55

Hang on a minute! Please can you explain about how the council charges you to speak to them? What is this??!!

sorrynotathome · 01/02/2023 17:55

Oh yes and a diagram please.

chocolateisavegetable · 01/02/2023 17:55

Make sure you provide a hi-vis jacket for your friend who’s going to come round with a clipboard to take photos and make notes

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