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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Should some songs never be sung again?

363 replies

Atethehalloweenchocs · 31/01/2023 21:57

I was at a social event where there was various songs which we were singing along to. One of which was Delilah. Obviously the content is abhorrent, but its a banger of a tune, and something that loads of people know. The day after, found an old playlist with a bunch of Michael Jackson stuff on. AIBU to think it is ok to sing along to a song with a good tune even if the content or artist is problematic?

OP posts:
Ludo19 · 01/02/2023 06:56

If I like a song I'll listen to it. One I don't like is W.A.P. I can't think why you'd sing about a fanny but each to their own.

CaptainMyCaptain · 01/02/2023 06:57

Young Girl is specifically about NOT having sex with an under age girl. I was not aware the singer had been conducted of under age sex.

CaptainMyCaptain · 01/02/2023 06:59

It's by Gary Pucket and the Union Gap BTW not Gary Glitter.

MrsMariaReynolds · 01/02/2023 07:00

Van Morrison's Brown Eyed Girl gives mega creeps with questionable lyrics. And if you know the origin of the song, you'd never sing along again...

PermanentTemporary · 01/02/2023 07:05

@MrsMariaReynolds I completely disagree.

lollipoprainbow · 01/02/2023 07:08

Ludo19 · 01/02/2023 06:56

If I like a song I'll listen to it. One I don't like is W.A.P. I can't think why you'd sing about a fanny but each to their own.

Bloody appalling lyrics ewwww

LlynTegid · 01/02/2023 07:11

In some cases the song, in some the artist singing it. Agree that this will include some rap misogynist songs.

Two little boys OK as a song, just not the Rolf Harris version.

littleburn · 01/02/2023 07:12

Songs sung by men about wanting/having sex with young women or underage girls - My Sharona ('I always get it up for the touch of the younger kind') and Girl, You'll be a Woman Soon ('you'll be a woman soon, soon you'll need a man') for example.

KangarooKenny · 01/02/2023 07:13

Jerry Lee Lewis married his 13 year old cousin, but people still sing Great Balls of Fire.

sorcerersapprentice · 01/02/2023 07:13

Don't stand so close to me

A cracking tune, but I don't hear it played often on the radio for pretty obvious reasons

CrapBucket · 01/02/2023 07:14

I'm always slightly wtf when I hear Michael Jackson on the radio. And I love a lot of things about Stormzy but its not great when I'm singing about 'finish with a f ..'

KangarooKenny · 01/02/2023 07:16

As soon as I hear Sam Smith on the radio I turn it over.

Chouetted · 01/02/2023 07:18

KimberleyClark · 01/02/2023 06:35

No plays to watch - Othello anyone?

Show quote history

I've never quite recovered from going to see Titus Andronicus as a teenager Confused

GimmeSleep · 01/02/2023 07:19

I can't / haven't listened to Lost Prophets since it was revealed what that sicko Ian Watkins did 😡Had even seen them live in the past.
Like PP I feel sorry for the other members of the band (assuming they had no idea what he was doing).

FancyFanny · 01/02/2023 07:21

A singer being convicted of something won't stop me enjoying their songs- they probably didn't write the song anyway and lots of great music will be lost if we have that attitude. Still love Michael Jackson- it's part of my childhood and growing up.

GimmeSleep · 01/02/2023 07:25

I also can't listen to Sam Fender but that's not on any moral grounds, I just think it's overhyped shit.

Cocochat · 01/02/2023 07:49

BenCoopersSupportWren · 01/02/2023 06:29

Part of the issue is that the world seems to have become so broad brush, black and white that we are increasingly losing the art of nuance, and there is a kind of glee taken in wilfully misunderstanding someone’s motivations in order to “other” them. So if Person A hears Person B listening to, say, Michael Jackson, there often follows a kind of performative outrage: “”OMG Person B doesn’t think there’s anything wrong with child abuse!” And no amount of protestations by Person B that they’ve chosen to separate the artist from the art will stop Person A finger pointing.

There are bands or singers I actively choose not to give royalties to any longer, but I wouldn’t beat myself up if I caught myself singing a snippet of one of their songs one day, because I know it doesn’t make me a CSA sympathiser. Similarly I don’t avoid old songs with “problematic” - by modern standards - lyrics; I might choose not to play them at a party but if it’s a banger I’ll listen to it in the privacy of my car or with headphones on.

I also think there is a difference between choosing privately not to listen to an artist’s output (or watch their films, read their books etc) because their actions now make you feel uncomfortable enjoying their art, and publicly calling for them to be “cancelled”. I’m not a massive fan of cancel culture or censorship in general TBH.

This^^

My dgs has loved Michael Jackson since his school friend told him about the zombies in Thriller when he was 6. He’s 10 now and really enjoys the music and we are not going to tell him he shouldn’t listen.

Ludo19 · 01/02/2023 08:04

"Every breath you take" has a stalker element too

FixTheBone · 01/02/2023 08:07

Cuppasoupmonster · 31/01/2023 22:24

You can’t help an ear worm but I wouldn’t play it if it was lostprophets for example…

This.

I think there's a line somewhere - where whatever it is about that person's psyche that makes them abhorrent, directly influences or shapes the music.

Lostprophets is a good example - even the name of the band could be construed as having some relation to the awful things their frontman was convicted of.

On the other hand, how do you deal with all the music Phil Spector had a part in making?

Obviously there's a line in the middle somewhere, where it is will vary person to person.

Siameasy · 01/02/2023 08:11

Free choice.
Art reflects life. Some of the Stones’ songs are now thought of as misogynistic but at the time this may have been the prevailing view. Listening to the songs now isn’t going to turn me into a misogynist. They’re very of their time-and as a result, a fascinating.

JustWantedACat · 01/02/2023 08:12

IAmWomanHearMeRoar1 · 01/02/2023 00:35

@JustWantedACat Neither was Jimmy Saville, so what's your point? Both of them were ever so clearly guilty, and we all (or most) know it.

Show quote history

Michael Jackson was found not guilty, Jimmy Saville was never arrested or charged as his crimes only came to public light after his death. If you think Jackson was guilty that's your opinion not a fact because the fact was he was found not guilty in a court of law.

OneFrenchEgg · 01/02/2023 08:15

The only one I refuse to have playing if it's my house or car is Little Drummer Boy due to the Hindley /Brady horrors inflicted on Lesley Anne. I can't listen to it knowing it was the backdrop to someone's torture and death.

Bubbylana · 01/02/2023 08:19

I was listerning to a compilation of songs by Dean Martin on Alexia my DH loves him. There is a song with Dean and Nat King Cole singing about the ladies in their life and they talk a bit in it and Dean said I would slap her and Nat agreed I was really shocked. Lots of old songs really are homophobic.

Marigoldandivy · 01/02/2023 08:21

Living Doll, Cliff Richard. ‘Gonna lock her up in a trunk….’ Ick.

Buffypaws · 01/02/2023 08:23

I’m reminded of that Reading goalie who deleted her Insta after singing a pro IRA song with the Irish team. She was more English than Irish but had no idea. I think people should draw their own boundaries - sometimes a tune is just a tune and you don’t know the origins or what it’s really about. It’s interesting.

For me I can’t listen to Michael Jackson but I can the Jackson 5. But I don’t get too worried about the lyrics/content so much.