Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Brits have a huge problem with alcohol

309 replies

SteveLpool · 29/01/2023 19:05

AIBU to think that this country has a particularly acute problem with boozing, alcohol, drinking (whatever you call it) compared to our peers in Europe and the rest of the world?

I've worked and travelled abroad quite a lot and i never had the issues i am having now being back at home in the UK with regards to being the odd one out at a bar or a pub just because I'm not having alcohol.

Sometimes a few of us will get together after work and I'll have a diet coke or even a soda water and lime.. when my choice of drink is known ("is there vodka in that????") there becomes an aura of uncomfortableness (if that is even a word) like I've committed a crime.. soon afterwards the comments come..

"what's in that?"
"why arnt you drinking"
"are you a lightweight"
"just have a couple"

I have a theory of why this is for Brits in particular.. We as a people are quite emotionally & socially reserved therefore inhibitions MUST be lowered to have any form of good time..

The med countries for example like Italy and Spain have more of a coffee wine bar culture because they are quite outgoing and introverted.

For the record I'm not against alcohol, I'm big on my fitness and gym and I'm not prepared to ruin my gains for a few hours in a dingy British pub.. I save my boozing for when i go away on holiday.

OP posts:
OutForBreakfast · 30/01/2023 02:01

SenecaFallsRedux · 29/01/2023 23:15

I'm in the US, too. A small and minor thing, but I'm always surprised at the posts on MN about teachers' presents where bottles of wine are mentioned. This would never happen in my neck of the woods in the US. It just would just not be acceptable, and you can never assume whether someone drinks alcohol or is teetotal. And it's not something you would likely know about your child's teacher.

Show quote history

DH gets wine as presents at work. He is teetotal but just gives them to me. It is seen as a generic present in the same way a box of chocolates or some flowers are seen.

GarlandsinGreece · 30/01/2023 02:04

This reply has been hidden

This reply has been hidden until the MNHQ team can have a look at it.

GarlandsinGreece · 30/01/2023 02:08

SenecaFallsRedux · 29/01/2023 23:15

I'm in the US, too. A small and minor thing, but I'm always surprised at the posts on MN about teachers' presents where bottles of wine are mentioned. This would never happen in my neck of the woods in the US. It just would just not be acceptable, and you can never assume whether someone drinks alcohol or is teetotal. And it's not something you would likely know about your child's teacher.

Show quote history

Interesting. I’m a Brit in Connecticut and always gift teachers wine, at the urging of American teacher friends. Ironically enough, I’m teetotal.

DdraigGoch · 30/01/2023 02:18

Sometimes a few of us will get together after work and I'll have a diet coke or even a soda water and lime.. when my choice of drink is known ("is there vodka in that????") there becomes an aura of uncomfortableness (if that is even a word) like I've committed a crime.. soon afterwards the comments come..

I've never really experienced this peer pressure. Perhaps it's the company you keep.

KimberleyClark · 30/01/2023 02:23

That2 · 29/01/2023 23:13

Not only has the culture become worse over the years, the strength of the Lager has increased. Years ago a pint was 3% ish now 5% is the norm. I’ve lived my life around drinkers. Mum and dad both pissheads, now both dead prematurely due to drinking/poor associated health and mates who drink way too much. I live in the North though and drinking has always been a big part of the Northern culture as many towns were traditionally working class with the men all going to the pubs after work.

The strength of wine has increased too. Hard to get a red under 13% and an increasing number are 14-14.5%.

DdraigGoch · 30/01/2023 02:30

Eyerollcentral · 29/01/2023 19:34

‘Here the pubs are steadily busy all day from opening in the morning. Mostly middle aged and old men wasting their lives and health away spending their pensions, dole or disability allowance.’ don’t know if you’re judgy or goady. My brother was a bar manager and 9/10 of the older men who sit in bars during the day do so because they like the company. They aren’t going home tanked up. They are sitting over two or three pints most of the day, chatting to others, maybe putting a bet on and watching the racing. It’s their social outlet. You sound very naive

Show quote history

Even so, before catching a train first thing on a Sunday morning, I discovered that the only place open to serve breakfast was Wetherspoons (£3.50 and you still feel short-changed). At 8am there were half a dozen men scattered about the place having liquid breakfasts.

DdraigGoch · 30/01/2023 02:36

AuntyMabelandPippin · 29/01/2023 19:43

I remember being in a park in France one lunchtime and seeing a school there.

The teachers were drinking red wine with their lunches.

Can you imagine if that happened here?

SNCF and French Eurostar drivers (so long as they are in France and won't be working into the UK later) are/were allowed wine with their lunch. That would be instant dismissal in the UK. Drug and alcohol policies are zero tolerance.

KimberleyClark · 30/01/2023 02:37

DdraigGoch · 30/01/2023 02:30

Even so, before catching a train first thing on a Sunday morning, I discovered that the only place open to serve breakfast was Wetherspoons (£3.50 and you still feel short-changed). At 8am there were half a dozen men scattered about the place having liquid breakfasts.

Show quote history

They might have come off night shifts tbf.

SenecaFallsRedux · 30/01/2023 02:37

GarlandsinGreece · 30/01/2023 02:08

Interesting. I’m a Brit in Connecticut and always gift teachers wine, at the urging of American teacher friends. Ironically enough, I’m teetotal.

Show quote history

One impediment for a lot of people is that many states and school districts prohibit bringing alcohol on to school grounds so they would need to find a way to deliver a gift of wine outside school hours and off school grounds.

Eyerollcentral · 30/01/2023 02:38

DdraigGoch · 30/01/2023 02:30

Even so, before catching a train first thing on a Sunday morning, I discovered that the only place open to serve breakfast was Wetherspoons (£3.50 and you still feel short-changed). At 8am there were half a dozen men scattered about the place having liquid breakfasts.

Show quote history

There are pissheads obvs but they could equally be coming off a night shift. There have always been bars in Dublin for example that opened at seven for workers on the markets who had been working half the night. I’ve also seen professional men in Spain having brandy w an espresso for their breakfast 🤷‍♀️

KimberleyClark · 30/01/2023 02:38

DdraigGoch · 30/01/2023 02:36

SNCF and French Eurostar drivers (so long as they are in France and won't be working into the UK later) are/were allowed wine with their lunch. That would be instant dismissal in the UK. Drug and alcohol policies are zero tolerance.

Show quote history

I visited the UN headquarters in Geneva about 23 years ago. They had wine and beer for sale in the canteen at lunchtime.

GarlandsinGreece · 30/01/2023 02:39

SenecaFallsRedux · 30/01/2023 02:37

One impediment for a lot of people is that many states and school districts prohibit bringing alcohol on to school grounds so they would need to find a way to deliver a gift of wine outside school hours and off school grounds.

Show quote history

Ah, okay. I didn’t realize things were so free and easy in CT. I simply drop off at the school office.

blebbleb · 30/01/2023 02:45

It's seen as amusing by some to drink a lot. I definitely agree with other posters that the under 30s drink a lot less. I've recently limited my drinking to half a bottle of wine once a week. Im not even 40 but don't want to set myself up for higher risk of cancer and liver damage. I've never been a heavy drinker as such but have been drunk many times in my younger years and I make a sloppy stupid drunk so it doesn't worth it.

WilburTheIron · 30/01/2023 02:51

I don’t think the UK is unusual for it based on other countries I’ve been to having the same problem.

Conversely, there’s one thing we’re much better at though, relating to alcohol - there is a stigma to drink driving in the UK (as there should be). Multiple other European countries I’ve been to, and multiple states in the US, happily drink and drive - to the point they think it strange to not to / to turn down a lift from someone who has drunk a lot.

Obviously it’s a generalisation, but a notable one. I think the change came around in the late 80s and the ad campaigns etc during that time.

Mummieslncorporated · 30/01/2023 04:50

CJsGoldfish · 29/01/2023 21:31

Go on over to the teen board and see how many 'parents' are buying their young teens alcohol because 'they all do it' and they don't want their kid left out. It's 'normal' to buy13/14/15 year olds alcohol to many. It's pretty fucked up so yeah, there is an issue.

Meh.

When in was that age, we didn't need parents to buy it for us - there was always a way to get hold if it without involving parents.

At least if it's the parents buying there's much more control over what and how much is getting bought.

I'm not at all convinced that in any way indicates that young people are drinking more. It just indicates that it's much harder to get hold of alcohol as a teen. When I was young, proof of age was a carefully doctored photocopy of a birth certificate. That's not accepted any more.

Mummieslncorporated · 30/01/2023 04:59

Ruffpuff · 29/01/2023 22:19

I’m 25, so I can’t speak for the youngest generation but there is definitely a ‘drinking culture’ within my age group. At uni the drinking culture was very much still alive.

Of course there is - but are they going out drinking every weekend, one, two (most common with my friendship group) or even three nights?

spickyspan · 30/01/2023 05:02

I think the young are drinking a lot less now. Pubs round my way are certainly not full of young people and there's plenty of young people around. They're more interested in healthy diets and the gym.

My dh doesn't drink at all but the culture in his work is to have a drink on a Friday, the biggest issues he's had is from Russians and certain Eastern Europes who cannot accept a 'man' won't drink.
He had a big argument with a Russian once when he refused to join him for a vodka (a client) and the client started to complain about dh not being a man luckily dh company stepped in to stop it all but I'd say there are worse cultures out there for it.

Most people here might say something or laugh but not get aggressive about it in the same way dh has witnessed some cultures do.

Roseyposeypudding · 30/01/2023 05:25

It’s not only a British thing. I know Brits who don’t drink at all. I live abroad at the moment and my friendship circle consists of Tibetan, Nepalis, Indians, French, Russians, Americans, and Dutch people who can drink forever - when I go for dinner with them, they’ll be out until the next morning still drinking! I’m the British one who can’t keep up, and I never drink unless I’m with them!

WeWereInParis · 30/01/2023 06:18

TheObstinateHeadstrongGirl · 30/01/2023 01:03

The wine thing is a bit odd. Its rank. Once upon a time it was to be consumed to complement food, now it’s a binge drink drink. I’ve never, ever had a wine that doesn’t taste disgusting. How can people stand it?

Well that's just a personal taste thing. I don't drink anymore but when I did, I genuinely liked the taste of dry white wine. I didn't like red wine.
I can't understand how anyone tolerates the taste of coffee but each to their own.

Original poster
SteveLpool · 30/01/2023 06:29

I do think young people are drinking less than when I were a teen.

My gym leisure centre is full of kids girls and lads. I think they all know how brutal the dating scene is these days.

Everything is online, and you need to look like an Instagram model to aquire happiness in love.

OP posts:
Mummieslncorporated · 30/01/2023 07:37

I thought I would see if there was anything recent about age and drinking - and found this from the end of last year, which confirms what many of us on here have said.

www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20220920-why-gen-zers-are-growing-up-sober-curious

MotherOfUnicorns4 · 30/01/2023 07:38

I used to be one of these drunks who drank to get wasted. I had mental health issues and got sucked in to the lifestyle of partying. I have ill health now so very rarely drink. The odd times I do I still binge drink, so try to avoid because I makes me feel awful (hangover, guilty feelings etc). My friend group has definitely got a lot smaller since stopping drinking as my old friends still drink a lot and find my non drinking very boring. I no longer like being around drunk people so meet these friends once a year for lunch.
DD 21 goes out with friends once or twice a week, has one or two and is rarely drunk. My teen sons are not at all interested in beer. We've offered them one before on special occasions and they either say no or nurse it then go back to their xbox! I'm glad they're not like I was at that age because I'd worry constantly about the stupid situations they may end up in.
Also, my maternal family is Lithuanian. Half of my ancestors have died from liver failure due to their vodka consumption.

LuciferRising · 30/01/2023 08:13

OutForBreakfast · 30/01/2023 01:57

In the United States:

Who is most likely to drink during pregnancy?
Among pregnant women, alcohol use was highest among:
Those aged 35-44 years (18.6 percent);
College graduates (13 percent); and.
Unmarried women (12.9 percent).

Women had a right be choice to drink during pregnancy but anyone who does has an issue with alcohol. I really can't see how they can deny that they do not. You see the post on MN bellyaching over whether to gave a glass. If they weren't dependent, they wouldn't care.

LuciferRising · 30/01/2023 08:13

*have

LuciferRising · 30/01/2023 08:14

Ignore the mistakes. Doing too many things!